Phenom | Kingz | Dabatos | TonySelf | Tha Q | Half Breed | Tito | 7th End | RV Radio |
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View Poll Results: Who won this battle? | |||
For$akeN | 5 | 71.43% | |
:.Faceless.: | 2 | 28.57% | |
Voters: 7. You may not vote on this poll |
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07-31-04, 09:12 PM | #1 |
Banned: Biting
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For$akeN vs :.Faceless.:
IP: A9A5 2BC6
topic: secret pleasures
due in 3 hours max unlimited line just dont make it a book house rules Minimum posts to vote: 300 Check in by: 08-03-04 at 09:12 PM Must drop verse in 4320 minutes after check in. |
07-31-04, 09:13 PM | #2 | |
Guest
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IP: A9A5 2BC6
:.Faceless.: has ACCEPTED this battle on 07-31-04 09:13 PM.
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07-31-04, 09:13 PM | #3 | |
Guest
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IP: DFD5 B866
For$akeN has ACCEPTED this battle on 07-31-04 09:13 PM.
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07-31-04, 10:07 PM | #4 |
Umm...Yeah
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IP: DFD5 B866
I love fictional writing........
July, 25th 1998, I sit silently in my empty house alone no noise at all but then a drop of a pen ruined the moment with a fall how it dropped I don't know was that fate for a reason? now a hobby...over the years it went to be a regular season each year at the same exact time I sit in the same place I abandoned my friends and my parents said I'm a digrace they have no idea of the enjoyable pleasure I've been through even after all the discrimination I knew what I had to do... *Pushes chair into the hall...* And I stay up throughout the entire night staring at the floor the sight of it was highly odd and the spot I couldn't ignore I quickly thought that there was completely nothing in the area but I see a shadow coming out of the darkness I get hysteria So I slowly turn my head around and I see nothing in sight all I knew was that a ghostly spirit was nearby me tonight I felt a pleasurable urge sneaking up by from what I do not know something was crawling up my leg creeping to the place below... *jumps up in fright but leg quickly stops...* it was edging closer and closer and the spirit got clearer to my surprise it was a woman and now I wouldn't fear her She was beautiful and by that I knew she wasn't gonna hurt me "she opened her mouth and said please help me become free"... I had no idea what she wanted so I asked her what do you mean? "free my wandering spirit...the story is I was killed as a teen I couldn't help myself I couldn't find the heart to say never "thank you kind man I swear to you I am in your debt forever" *she leads me to the basement* for what reason is she taking me here?... I look down in shock there was a skeleton in a chest that I tried before to unlock "please bury it in the backyard for that was my very last wish" I bring it outside and held it not dropping it like it was a dish grab a shovel from the shed and start to dig into the ground it was big enough to fit it in, for that second I felt renowned... "I thank you deeply from the bottom of my everlasting heart" feelings emerged and from within...I asked her not to depart but she said "no" oh now hurt I felt you can not experience she also said "I have no choice this was not meant to offense" so I said my my goodbyes tears dripping down from my eyes... I'll let it be known she is my secret pleasure that I can't deny... |
07-31-04, 10:15 PM | #5 |
Banned: Biting
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IP: A9A5 2BC6
By day he worked, but at night he lurked outta sight
Seemed polite to talk to, but something wasn’t right His eyes would ignite, running up and down bodies Everybody always told their kids… “Don’t talk to bobby” His upbringing was average, wasn’t beat, wasn’t savage With no malice, and a choirboy on Sundays, he’d practice Mondays he looked forward to school, even mathematics And was emphatic about gaining and remaining successful Never complaining or faking illness, so was put on a pedestal His parents claiming bobby would be a doctor and settle…Down… Making millions, gaining brilliance and curing ailments And wouldn’t drown in the social paradox…never failing In laymen’s he wouldn’t drift, start clowning, then drop out They’d insist and were correct, became a scientist… no doubt They were proud, but his mind defied this, with deep secrets Cos he was sleepless, with wide eye lids… craving foetus Well almost, cos underneath it, beneath his phenotype Was a perverted genotype… hidden like the sun at night Gazing in his dim light, within, a world of his insanity It would excite him manically and sporadically he’d seek He’d reap, but no one knew… cos he’d keep it deep And as he grew so did his urges and surges of disgust With his sickened lust, but… I cottoned to his way’s of play The next day… I followed him. Got to know his routine And like a fiend of mercy, I deemed myself the saviour To stop this behaviour, of his dirty disgusting failure “I hate ya” is what I said before I stabbed him in the head Now he’s dead, im doing porridge… 20 years to acknowledge Now he can’t forage, and what I saved makes it worth the time Cos no more rape of kids equals, to me… Peace of mind |
07-31-04, 10:36 PM | #6 | |
DaTrus Is A Bitch!
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IP: B80A A22F
Voted For: For$akeN
Aiyo Check It.. ForSaken: 6/10 Yours Was Good...Not Too Much of A Ryhme Scheme but Your Emotion Was Good. Nice Picture..But The Direction You Took Isn't That Original. Vocabulary Was Alright..But Nice Overall Drop. Facless: 8/10 Nice Ryhme Scheme..Multis Were Hot..and Your Point Of View and Direction With Your Verse Was Nice. Good Use Of Words and A Nice Vocabulary. Good Drop Here...Hot Shyt. Vote - Facless Nice Battle To Both! ~R~ Vote fixed.. polled to faceless |
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07-31-04, 10:55 PM | #7 |
Umm...Yeah
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IP: DFD5 B866
^i'll get that removed polled wrong person.................................
and switched to get your vote...............
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08-01-04, 04:34 PM | #8 | |
Ill Nigga Alert.
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IP: 3240 794D
Voted For: :.Faceless.:
For$aken- your verse was nice...i was feelin it...had some nice structure i mean good...you stayed on topic...umm you had some nice wordplay...and also you had some nice vocab...but overall you did well in this battle... ...FaceLess...- your verse was nice too, but i liked it more then For$aken's verse...your structure was aight but his was better tho...you stayed on topic too...your wordplay was good...your vocab was better tho in this battle and your better vocab is what is gonna give you my vote ...so overall you got my vote for better verse and vocab...
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