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View Poll Results: Who won this battle?
Lyric 0 0%
Spektikul 5 100.00%
Voters: 5. You may not vote on this poll

 
 
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Old 01-27-05, 04:15 PM   #1
Adam
 
From: Canada
Lyric vs Spektikul

IP: 4A0A BEB6

Battle Rules:

Crew Battle: The Establishment vs Non-Phixional Con.Tentz

Topical Battle

Topic: "Too Late"

20 Minimum Lines - 40 Maximum Lines


No Crew Votes
No Recycling
No Biting
No Dickriding
No Hate Votes

Minimum posts to vote: 200

Check in by: 02-01-05 at 03:15 PM

Must drop verse in 7200 minutes after check in.
 
Old 01-29-05, 03:14 AM   #2
System
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
IP: 25E4 9760

Lyric has ACCEPTED this battle on 01-29-05 02:14 AM.
 
Old 01-29-05, 05:10 PM   #3
System
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
IP: C431 103C

Spektikul has ACCEPTED this battle on 01-29-05 04:10 PM.
 
Old 01-31-05, 05:08 PM   #4
Spektikul
The Original Half Ass King
 
Spektikul's Avatar
 
From: Canada
IP: C431 103C

"Too Late"

Introduction

There once lived this boy, that was never popular or cool
Isolated from all of the other children at school
His family was less fortunate, for lunch he'd get a quarter
At noon he'd write poems, for his girlfriend in the corner
The two were insperable, from the present to the start
They were together forever, and could never tear apart


Conflicts

Some kids in his class, would often scream at him and shout
But he would pay no attention, because he blocked them all out
They'd say "look at that kid, hes such a loser, isn't he?"
It didnt bother him much, but after school it hurt physically
They got him onto the ground, with repeated kicks to the head
An they'd beat him unconscious, even after he had blead
One boy searched his pocket, and it hurt in the worst way
Cause he was saving his quarters, for hius girlfriends birthday
That night he got home, his parents asked "what did you do?"
He explained to them fully, but they said "go to your room!"
In there he sat and he wrote, for several hours he spent
He then approached his open window, and out it he went


Tragedy

Inside his girlfriends house, he told her stories of horror
Lit a candle and started reading, the poems he wrote for her
She soon fell asleep, he gently kissed her head - then he split
While she slept she knocked over, the burning candle he lit
The next morning he woke, before the schools bell made a sound
He went to pick up his girl, her house was burnt to the ground


Resolution

He opened his backpack, devistated - he pulled out a gun
She was the one he ever had, now he was mad and all done
His adrenaline was flowing, there was no way he could stop
He ran inside the school, and then he climbed up to the top
With the gun pressed to his throat, he could see way down below
All the people from school, that he would never get to know
With a tear beneith his eye, he then screamed up to the sky
"I hope all the rest of you mother fuckers go to Hell and die!"
With the finger on the trigger, he knew that this was fate
Police rushed to the roof, but they were already "Too Late."


Conclusion

I am the boy that robbed him, and picked on him in class
I constantly abused him, and after school I'd kick his ass
Now I get hurt throughout the day, I dont talk to anyone at all
At lunch I sit and write, with his same notebook in the hall
He now writes poems in heaven, for his girlfriend all day long
"His existance was never acknowledged, until he already was gone."
 
Old 02-03-05, 02:52 AM   #5
LyRiCaL GeEnUs
Da KiNg Of PwNaGe
 
LyRiCaL GeEnUs's Avatar
 
From: GhEtTo
IP: 25E4 9760

Too Late

Lungs heavy with blood, short of breath and not breathing
Just out of reach, lying on the cement compulsively heaving
Legs severed at the knee, worthless limbs bent out of shape
And I think I lost an eye, but The angles not that great
A victim of a tragedy, car crashed into the land you see
Death came upon impact and left me a sadistic fantasy
My soul is trapped inside, struggling to rise and depart
Trapped between crushed ribs and my flattened heart
My spirit hovers above, watches my body go into convulsions
Until I break free, and am joined to make me whole again
A ghost invisible, to those who choose not to see
So I stay and watch the events, that all surround the dead me
They take my body away, and the crowd starts to disperse
And still I hover lazily, no hurry to get off of Earth
What do I do next? A voice whispers for me to go
Up to heavens gate, follow the path of the rainbow
But what’s the hurry I tell myself, So much I can explore
Go to all the places, that I could never go to before
So I drift around for days, now worries on my mind
Until and angels makes me realize, I’m almost out of time
A time limit? You kidding? Of all the pointless things
But heaven only takes, those souls who are ready and willing
I find myself with St Peter, standing before heaven’s gate
He says” The lock is sealed from you,
I’m afraid you are too late”

[/center]
 
Old 02-03-05, 03:35 AM   #6
Spektikul
The Original Half Ass King
 
Spektikul's Avatar
 
From: Canada
IP: C431 103C

werd...nice drop...uppin to start voting ya'll....
 
Old 02-03-05, 12:00 PM   #7
Adam
 
From: Canada
This was feedback posted for Spektikul

IP: 50E1 F494

Checking The Polls................................
 
Old 02-03-05, 01:01 PM   #8
Spektikul
The Original Half Ass King
 
Spektikul's Avatar
 
From: Canada
IP: C431 103C

Upped...start the voting.........
 
Old 02-03-05, 04:04 PM   #9
eph
As Seen On T.V.
 
IP: 5867 FD83

Voted For: Spektikul

Spek:

wow, that almost perfect. the imagery was butter. seems you put a lot of emotion into it. your enitre verse was dope, from start to finish...nice piece. your structure played a positive role, since your flow was good...it forced the story to be readable and easily comprehended. your story true or not, crossed boundries ive never seen encountered even in novels. the system of events in your verse lead to the tragic ending, and was clear this kid was neglected. his parents, his peers, and himself were all insecure about his potential as a human being. mad porps. you came the best with this one.

Lyric: your verse was good as well, you have the ideal topical elements mastered, the word fundamental is an understatement to you. quote that if you want. ha. your piece did a nice job painting a picture of sorrow. good job as well.

V/ spek

favored his verse more, nice topic...both did good.
should be considered best topical battle of february.

dont return the favor, that is not why i vote.
__________________
quote your own damn lyrics...
 
Old 02-03-05, 06:25 PM   #10
LyRiCaL GeEnUs
Da KiNg Of PwNaGe
 
LyRiCaL GeEnUs's Avatar
 
From: GhEtTo
IP: 25E4 9760

thanks for the honest vote...upp .
 
Old 02-03-05, 09:22 PM   #11
LyRiCaL GeEnUs
Da KiNg Of PwNaGe
 
LyRiCaL GeEnUs's Avatar
 
From: GhEtTo
IP: 25E4 9760

Vote on this people ..
 
Old 02-03-05, 10:29 PM   #12
Kyleon
Yeah,This Account = Alias
 
IP: 3240 794D

Voted For: Spektikul

shit was hot fam...good image from both of you...felt this shit was heavy and i actually think i was talking to st peter lol...naw j/p...good metas in both drops..but the thing it came down to was structure...and i liked how spektikul wrote his...this shit was hot..yall dont need elavation

v/Spektikul
 
Old 02-04-05, 12:59 AM   #13
Spektikul
The Original Half Ass King
 
Spektikul's Avatar
 
From: Canada
IP: C431 103C

Best topical of February...wow...uppin............
 
Old 02-04-05, 04:51 AM   #14
Spektikul
The Original Half Ass King
 
Spektikul's Avatar
 
From: Canada
IP: C431 103C

Upping....more honest votes plz all...
 
Old 02-04-05, 01:35 PM   #15
Spektikul
The Original Half Ass King
 
Spektikul's Avatar
 
From: Canada
IP: C431 103C

Upping ... ... ...
 
 


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