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Old 02-19-07, 07:25 AM   #1
KempoMRK
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LBL Magazine (4th February 2007 - LBL's Final Week)

IP: 9839 DB84





Intro

Whaddup. I wanna finish this league off properly, and as it’s never ever missed a mag, I can’t let this week be any different. So yeah, this mag won’t be great as I’m pretty busy with the all time stuff. But it’s a mag and therefore there is now a mag for every week of the LBL.

The LBL Cypher

Haha damn. I saw that this had 134 replies and I was like ahh fuck, I’ve gotta read through all this. Turns out though, that about ½ of that was wack ezboard battlers dropping rhymes, so I just skipped over them, and about a ¼ was beef between RapVerse and these ezboard people. Nick Fletcher had a huge argument with some dude aha. Anyway. Comedian won this, he dropped some nice lines. Props to him on being the last ever LBL Cypher winner. Check his lines:

Comedian is prepared to fight, i'll leave this cat rattled
i'll raise a fist,
that also resembles your vote count last battle
who are you? i'm sick of murking wack kids
it's fitting i put a round in your circle jerking faggots
^you've been online, too- this gay is wrecked
i'll smash that dollar sign in your name to cents

Native Pryde also dropped a nice bar:

If fuckin up leagues is crime...then DTh is a lifer
& postin up conditions is tha only time you rule a cypher

Battle Reviews

1. N. Tavarez (22-5) vs. 2. Comedian (13-2)

Comedian dropped first and you can tell he’s not really used to long battles. It seemed that he was really trying to hard for concepts and it showed. Tavarez dropped aight, he was reasonably consistent but only a couple of bars stood out. The comic strip bar was the nicest, I was feeling that. N.Tavarez took this pretty comprehensively.

3. Te Ora (12-4) vs. 4. Sonny Dimebags (20-10)

Ahaha, Sonny drops late till the end. 25 minutes before the deadline this time, I don’t think he’s ever dropped early lol. Te Ora dropped aight, pretty average throughout. He had an eye que bar that I liked and hit hard. Sonny’s verse was mad rushed, nothing really hit. Te Ora took this 1-0.

LBL Extreme Championship Belt – Wireless vs Showcase

This was a Tom Cruise vs Oprah battle ‘n it was aight. I thought Showcase took it though, he had a nobel bar that I thought was really funny. This ended up a tie, 1 vote a piece.

Borat vs Jew Battle – Daubs vs JTR

Pretty good battle, funny from both sides. JTR dropped decent, he had a couple of punches I liked. The epic battle bar was my favourite. I thought Daubs dropped better, he had 3 nice punches and the cap ya skull bar was really tight. No one voted though cos they dropped late so it was a tie.

Iron Man Battle – Stanza vs Tony Brown

Iono who thought it’d be a good idea to have these two in an iron man battle. The voters thought so to as this got no votes. It was a pretty bland battle. And it ended up a tie.

Marvel Madness Battle – Prosecutor vs Nick Fletcher

Nick Fletcher won via no-show.

Multies Battle – N.Tavarez vs Wordz Ahgod

Double no-show.

Ninja vs Samurai Battle – Nick Fletcher vs Wordz Ahgod

Nick Fletcher won via no-show.

Triple Threat Wrestling Battle – Nick Fletcher vs Mets vs Roger Glocks

Triple no-show.

TV Star Battle – Te Ora vs Native Pryde

Te Ora won via no-show.

5. Tony Brown (3-0) vs. 6. Mets (3-0)

Mets won via no-show.

7. Wireless (3-0) vs. 8. TEF (8-7)

Ehh weak battle. Neither dropped anything of note, both verses were pretty average. Nothing terribly bad, just boring and plain. TEF won this, he came a little bit better.

9. DaTrusHurtz (23-4) vs. 10. Stanza (12-14)

Stanza dropped weak, he’s still got a newb style after all these weeks. He must not pay attention to what he’s told or something. DaTrus came better, his verse looked like it took him about 30 seconds though. No one voted, so it came down to a tie and both won.

11. So Rell (2-0) vs. 12. Wordz Ahgod (5-2)

So Rell won via no-show.

13. Keyed (4-2) vs. 14. Aeral (1-0)

Aeral won via no-show.

15. Area51 (1-0) vs. 16. Rush Lingo (17-6)

Area51 won via no-show.

17. Marksmen (1-0) vs. 18. Prosecuter (3-3)

Marksmen won via no-show.

19. Phil Benjamin (6-5) vs. 20. Don'tKnowMe (1-1)

Ok battle. DontKnowMe dropped a nice floor bar that I was feeling, it was pretty fresh to me and I liked it. The rest of his verse was fairly average. Phil had a head/coin bar that hit, but its pretty played so I wasn’t feeling it for that reason. DontKnowMe won.

21. Eye Que (1-1) vs. 22. Binary I (1-1)

This battle was poor. They both came with and neither verse was good at all. No real nice concepts or punches to note from either. Eye Que didn’t drop as bad as Binary though, so Eye Que won.

23. BISHOP (1-0) vs. 24. §howcase (0-1)

Weird battle, neither came very good. Bishop dropped first and his verse was pretty average, didn’t really have any standouts. Then Showcase dropped and he was the same really. Hard battle to call but BISHOP took it 3-1.

25. Mike V (0-0) vs. 26. Native Pryde (0-0)

Pretty inconsistent verses on both sides. Mike V had a pryde/ufc bar that was cool, I was feelin that. Cept that he had nothing, and a played bar with the RV/home stuff. Native Pryde had nothing really. There was only one vote on this and it was for a tie, so this battle ended up a tie.

27. GC (0-0) vs. 28. K (0-0)

GC won via no-show.

Top Punches

come on man, just turn on the tv check ppv and you'll see..
pryde fightin is poor, that whys everyone signed with UFC..

12. Mike V vs Native Pryde

*CENSOR* dont vote if you dont get that^, or u'll be toast like a whore
i've got tickets for the lakers tonight after this KO, so we're BOTH on the floor

11. Don'tKnowMe vs Phil Benjamin

im takin him yes, crush his body if he says the fakest of threats
so il have his spine curlin more than the hair on his head

10. Daubs (Borat) vs JTR (Jew)

I mean this, but your movie was hilarious, it was amazing dude
Girls must REALLY think it's funny
...cuz they sure aint coming to see u in a bathing suit

9. JTR (Jew) vs Daubs (Borat)

Why I gotta battle this faggot? I mean, forget his gay clothes
I struck up a fighting stance, ^ and he struck up a gay pose

8. Nick Fletcher (Ninja) vs Wordz Ahgod (Samurai)

we're all laughing at u, not cuz ur funny, but cuz ur speech weak
ur not a comedian..
he's the dude who owns Native in the cypher each week

7. Te Ora (Jay Leno) vs Native Pride (George Lopez)

I had to host the peace prize with this whore, I was almost in tears,
So I’ll beat her so badly until she hears No-bell…only the ringing in her ears.

6. Showcase (Tom Cruise) vs Wireless (Oprah)

and you might laugh kid, but i beat ya when i diss ya
"i have a wife"....your still sleeping with ya sisters

5. Daubs (Borat) vs JTR (Jew)

I've had epic battles on this board, so no doubt ima take this fam
Cuz your epic battle included wrestling with a fat naked man

4. JTR (Jew) vs Daubs (Borat)

your an idiot. so u won't win this dam thing
when your eye que is lower than he is in the rankings

3. Te Ora vs Sonny Dimebags

your a fruit your gay, serious bruv, this dude is bate
il pull out my gat and cap ya skull to pursue your faith

2. Daubs (Borat) vs JTR (Jew)

Plus undressing chicks glance at cha body and vomit quick
Wont even buy the newspaper....after watching THIS comic strip

1. N.Tavarez vs Comedian

Verse of the Week

Daubs (As Borat)

so im rockin my thong, but i not got the bra
your just angry its not as tight as your pockets are
im gonna fuckin drop this kid, need to stop it prick
cos you are tight...wen talkin about your wallets zip
you mock my dick..but still your the fuckin wack prick
so il be droppin this jew quicker than hitlers gas did
and you might laugh kid, but i beat ya when i diss ya
"i have a wife"....your still sleeping with ya sisters
and quite frankly its so funny, im sharp you flow bluntly
with such a big nose, if you sneezed..youd drown my whole country
ya know g...your NO G so please just stop the bluffin
you wear a top hat, but really..your tophat nothin
your a fruit your gay, serious bruv, this dude is bate
il pull out my gat and cap ya skull to pursue your faith
im takin him yes, crush his body if he says the fakest of threats
so il have his spine curlin more than the hair on his head
flowin im stable, kill you quick, i know that im able
with a blade, il leave you more holy than the hole in ya bagels

Battle of the Week

Borat vs Jew Battle – Daubs vs JTR

JTR

I went 18. We're late but drop now anyways...


Believe this, I got mad fresh shit on you, I drop the cleanest
What u got on Jews? Ya we got BIG noses... that are larger then your penis
I mean this, but your movie was hilarious, it was amazing dude
Girls must REALLY think it's funny
...cuz they sure aint coming to see u in a bathing suit
Needa shave ya couch, and don't act hard you're fake
You rocking those Tony Montana glasses so s'only right that I scar ya face
And bro you in need, he's 3rd world, needs some dough or some cream
Poor bitch had to steal Rossie Odonnels thong just to go to the beach
This ho is just weak, and your stupid song makes no sense so don't bother son
If ya "throw the jews down the well" wheres kazakstan gonna get water from?
You slaughtered son, & ya nose is huge, ya better believe the facts it's true
Ya nose is SOOO aqualine it could be used to measure the sea in back of you
Get beat black and blue, I don't understand how you gonna diss jews though
When you copying OUR hairstyle rocking that fucking jew fro
We know how to manage our pay, f'real, jews just handle the wage
So ya we pinch pennies... that could feed your fucking family for days
I've had epic battles on this board, so no doubt ima take this fam
Cuz your epic battle included wrestling with a fat naked man

Yes, very nice.

Daubs

so im rockin my thong, but i not got the bra
your just angry its not as tight as your pockets are
im gonna fuckin drop this kid, need to stop it prick
cos you are tight...wen talkin about your wallets zip
you mock my dick..but still your the fuckin wack prick
so il be droppin this jew quicker than hitlers gas did
and you might laugh kid, but i beat ya when i diss ya
"i have a wife"....your still sleeping with ya sisters
and quite frankly its so funny, im sharp you flow bluntly
with such a big nose, if you sneezed..youd drown my whole country
ya know g...your NO G so please just stop the bluffin
you wear a top hat, but really..your tophat nothin
your a fruit your gay, serious bruv, this dude is bate
il pull out my gat and cap ya skull to pursue your faith
im takin him yes, crush his body if he says the fakest of threats
so il have his spine curlin more than the hair on his head
flowin im stable, kill you quick, i know that im able
with a blade, il leave you more holy than the hole in ya bagels

Outro

There’s no predictions to do, no power rankings to do, no watch out to do. So that’s it for this mag. And for the league. I ain’t gonna say much about the league in this mag, look out for what I’ve gotta say in the All Time Mag. It’s been fun though. Peace.
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Old 02-19-07, 07:29 AM   #2
KempoMRK
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The LBL All Time Magazine will be up tomorrow or the next day. Watch out for it.
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Old 02-19-07, 10:52 AM   #3
Appocolyptik
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Good job as always, looking forward to the all time mag whenever that's ready.
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Old 02-19-07, 11:33 AM   #4
DaTrusHurtz
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good shit Kempo, thx for doin' this
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Old 02-20-07, 03:42 PM   #5
Native Pryde
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we're all laughing at u, not cuz ur funny, but cuz ur speech weak
ur not a comedian..
he's the dude who owns Native in the cypher each week
-lmao

but yeah, good looks on this
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Old 02-20-07, 03:48 PM   #6
N.Tavarez
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thanks for doing this Kempo, much appreciation even though you already have your own league to do mags for......good stuff
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Old 02-20-07, 08:30 PM   #7
KempoMRK
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Closed. Moved to archives.
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