(hookx2)

in my rhyme book... youll see the lyrical talent is feirce...
in my rhyme book... ill have you breaking it down for years...
in my rhyme book... youll see things beyond ya wildest fears...
in my rhyme book... youll understand my pain and my tears...

(verse1)

i write to calm my nerves a few nouns and verbs...
and what occurs is obsurd when i spit a few words...
i write my thoughts down on paper and then logic occurs...
im th e type smoke herb till my vision is blurred...
then recite word for word of just what you prefer...
cuz that written word gets transfered to the lines on the page...
and then i spit a crazy blind rage to leave ya mind in a haze...
i just gaze cuz im amazed at these corny cliche's...
one of these days this phase gonna end up a craze...
and people gonna start killing for what gets said in this phrase...
but for now lets just have a toast for better days...
and theres gotta be some better ways for us to get paid...
my rhyme book is crazy ya minds shook and hazy...
what would you do if you made 100,000 dollars daily...
this is only one verse i should be in a hurst...
and whats worse is that my names both a gift and a curse...
i could tell you it hurts or tell you i been puttin in work...
but the thought of being broke has me going berserk...


kinda short but i wrote it in like 20 mins and im gonna be posting pt. 2 and 3 later on this week definetly upping for some feed back i love the critisism whether it be destructive or constructive let me know holla at ya boy

-one-

lets see now...
this is pretty basic as far as vocab and stuff...
the concept is pretty decent....
the flow is cool but its really to simplistic like there wasnt enough creativeness to it...
u pretty much stood ont he topic but didnt do much with it either...

i see where you going with this topic and all but i would like to see more multis in there to make ya flow sound alot better... try useing some word-play to make ya creativeness seem alot better and a few meta's also helps...

the hook is cool...
the verse needs a bit of work but not a bad drop... 6/10

keep droping and pratics a bit more before u drop it re-read it and see if its to simplistic and try to change it...

i'll be looking for more drops...


go peep my drop called: calm the fuck down ( 300 J.G we running this rap shit )

You have 'till 1:35 PM to leave links. pz

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