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Conquering Hell
this was my verse in a collab i did and i lost the other 2 verses.. so i'm gonna just put mine up and put the whole thing up when i find it.. well here it is.. If theres a big paragraph of writing, that means u have to flow it non-stop to make it sound right..
As i arive in a disguise ready to decriminalize the demons from the dark side.. but to my suprise i see the devils eyes revised with more despise relized he gets a rise.. outta hearin cries.. and seein em about to die.. Around each corner mourners in disorder for supportin.. the torture of corpses and worshipin the heads of horses.. now on course for eternal scorchin but remain remorseless.. satan called his forces when he learned of our revolt from his sources.. My verbal bullets like confetti rainin over satans-parade.. While he's awaitin souls are taken bloods sprayin-from-veins.. Tryin to scream for help but throats lacerated by razorblades.. But the bodies movin like they playin charades.. As i extole these empty souls for the console of human sacrafice.. I see that hell has distortions of christ and the poltergeist.. Tryin to entice the demons to rise on the blackest-nights.. Forcin me to come back in the after life strapped-with-mics.. Saved the innocent souls about to be slain without a grave.. My names forever engraved in the cells of the reapers brain.. Tryin to keep the tension-displaced in this demented dimension.. Retensions-erased, asension outta hell while left behind are apprehensions.. Leave feedback.. 1ne |
to put simply
nice i just love how each word flowed from one to another nice vocab too you can really see a picture being painted in your flow -1- |
hey...
yea i guess this was pretty good...nah ya done good....we got a lot more emcees coming out since i first came to this site a LONG while back....much luv..God bless....1...
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yo this was a nice peice. it flowed well and was well writtin.
holla one |
thanx.. lookin for more in-depth repsonses..
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bwah
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blah. Page 2 already.
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nothin
ayo that was a good flow son...stay up...1
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I liked this piece quite a bit. The best aspects were the flow and the imagery. The flow was very, very tight. It definitely helped me to read the piece. Nice multisyllable rhymes.
Quote of Note: My verbal bullets like confetti rainin over satans-parade.. While he's awaitin souls are taken bloods sprayin-from-veins.. That was my favorite part. Dope image. Nice rhyme. Nice Drop. Peace |
well thanx. page 2. up.
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the flow was so smooth-the content was cold as fuck---kinda short---lookin forward to peepin the whole collab-mad love always---one---c.
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hot spit
this was a hot verse kid. nice vocab., multi's and wordplay. interesting topic too. it was hot, nicely put together. make a little longer, you should do an audio too. aight man, i'm definetely uppin' this shit.
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well thanx it was supposed to be an audio we're just too lazy :(.. but thanx for the up even tho that doesnt work to good around here lol
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this was ight, couldn't really figure out the flow. ya need better structure. also put your stuf into barz it would be a hell of alot easier to read. either way stay up.
joey |
blah @ you. can you not read? "If theres a big paragraph of writing, that means u have to flow it non-stop to make it sound right.." and besides the first two paragraphs.. it WAS in bars. and now ur saying it was "iight" because u couldnt find a flow. god. blah. u didnt even read it all.
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