thats the end..................thats all u got from that whole thing......i think.....poetics probably just ya mans.......but n e wayz.....go away :thumbup:

Duh!...That's what I ment by Sucidal...And Poetic is my man :love:

na but I'm saying....I'm a realist......and I'm sorry but a case of postpartum......is going 1 or 2 places....a complete cure....or someones death

It look like you've mixed both of them in one Place...The 2nd part, was the cure and the 3rd part was someone death, right?

ur poetics girl in real life?

post pics i wanna see this.

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !! :laugh: :laugh2:


No,No, No...I'm not REALLY his girl. I was being sarcastic, were just e-friends, but anyway I'm a lesbo. Mostly RV know that, you don't remember Lola Cruez. II?

This was feedback posted for Billy Baghdad
 

i just wanted to say that both of my crhymies got down....props fellas. keep up the good work gentlemen.

^^^UPPIN" FOR MY FOLKERS!!!

...BOOST THE MUTHAFUCKING CRHYME RATE!!!


...the supervillain of crhyme...

upps^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ ^^

This was feedback posted for Billy Baghdad
 

Ysdat-

Opening Thoughts - your rhyme scheme was ok... not great. the imagery was ok, but i'm not buying the diary entry theme that you're running with. this part just doesnt seem to come natural for lack of a better term...

Who am I?- Again, the rhyme scheme wasnt great. the diary thing still isnt working. there were a few corny type lines, the rest kinda made up for it, but just barely. this part left me like 'huh?' feeling like there was alot more you could've done with it.

Lifes prevail- This was probally the best section of this peice. your imagery was there more than opening thoughts & who am i. your rhyme scheme fell off a little more in this one,and the ending was weak.

Overall- you need to work on your rhyme scheme, and just being more natural when you write. your wording needed work, there didnt seem to be any rhythm in what you wrote. this verse left me feeling like you couldve done alot better with the topic. the 'dear diary' thing didnt do you any favors either... if i was you i would've left that out. you should've put some more work into making the reader actually believe they're reading this persons diary, you know? just putting "Dear Diary" doesn't have that effect.

Billy Baghdad-

Section 1-

Your imagery was probally the best thing about this. there wasnt a problem trying to see what you were trying to portray. the rhyme scheme was hit & miss. your wording couldve been better- but nothing too major. overall it was a decent introduction...

Section 2-

the first few lines were ehhhhhhh... then it gets better. seems like you just snapped lol... the rhyme scheme was pretty good, imagery was nice... almost too good... seems like you thought about murdering babys more than once lol... overall, this part was good: rhyme scheme, wording, imagery was all there.
"Disgustin’ but shes lovin the feeling of nothin’
A numbness she’s trustin’ cause it keeps the demons from fussin’"
not bad

Section 3-

this was alright... i think you could've done better with the ending. it tied in with the rest of the story, it wasnt bad but i would've done something else. the wording couldve been better from time to time... it wasnt much of a distraction though, so i guess it was ok, same with the rhyme scheme.

overall- pretty good peice, a few minor changes here & there would've made it alot better.

Vote- Billy Baghdad

oh, and fuck the 500 post rule.... lol... typin up all that shit n i cant even get a mufuckin vote in.

This was feedback posted for Poetic Artist
 

..............not votin just checkin the polls lol
i HATE this new battlin system (well new to me cuz it wasnt like this when i used to battle)

^^^bump, bump, bump...


...the supervillain of crhyme

Voted For: Billy Baghdad

This was a really good battle, u don't really see two dope
topical heads going at it on here anymore,...

Y - like the image and the whole structure of your verse
the imagery, and originality was dope ! but after that u
didn't really go anywhere. You had nice vocab and flow
and all that but it was all to predictable for me. Start
really well but I thought you could have worked a bit
more on the close.

Babs - Your verse was kind of the opposite of Y's u
come doing what u do best no gimmicks just dope
writing. You gave me a visual image of your verse in
my head and the emotions of the poor woman made
me take more notice of your verse.

Y's had the dopest bar,...
small glimps thru a window allows the sight of smoldering rain
I strongly carry myself on my back to shoulder the pain

Dopeness !!

This was a really good battle, I don't need to go into flow
and vacab and all that u both was dope the raw emotions
won this for Babs and the close was like Damn !!!

Vote ~ Babs

Stay up both great battle

1~

This was feedback posted for Billy Baghdad
 

check polls..............................