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-   -   Shenga Vs. Michael Madness (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=108286)

Daz 01-20-04 07:21 PM

goona have to go with the above right here .. Shenga

This bitch cant spit worth shit//
becuase this fucking clit is illiterate//
weak punch, opener wasnt that good
bow down to me and place a crown upon my head//
because as you can see your already fucking dead//
Ok, how is he already dead? neither of these two lines are dising him, just fillers na mean?[b]
ill tare you to shreds//
i leave the even the illest lying in death beds//
[b] Ok your lines are setting the judges up, but weres the follow throughs? ex
Ill tare you to shreds you can call me shredda
fuck ninja turtles althought i doubt you can do better
Leaver you in death beds, i cant help it i sound so def
watch as i jam through ya crew with a simple reverse step
set up follow through, try an connect your lines
i produce rage though words//
while this bitch be cooking with sage and herbs//
the concept could come across alot better if you worked on it.. was feel it though
im packing lyrical fury//
your lacking rhymes to impress the jury(the voters)//
could have come off better, make your lines more directed
Fuck You en I don't mean that in the way you thinkin//
this battle is over before you start blinkin//
Ok now the set up you had wasnt that bad, but ya follow through kind of fell off... but you started with an ok punch
Murder you and your n*ggas without thinkin//
theres a little tast of my poetic mind//
more of a filler just through in there
so go ahed and spit, i see right through your pathetic design//
ending could have come better...[b]

Ok your lacking punchs, and im not really seeing anything personal.. Your rhyme scheme is decent, although like everyone else you need some elevation, peep other peoples, and try out WEC and open mic.. look for other places as well that will inspire ideas


Michael Maddness
This Kid couldn't get any worse, his shit
is splerged w/ words only used by Herbs /
Crunch Time, wins are earned, there essential to earth /
[b]opening isnt that strong, punch didnt seem to have much in it, not bad for the battle though
you couldn't earn a win w/ those wack metaphors and verbs /
You gettin served, N i ain't even puttin effort into my verse /
punchs are really hard hitting, flow seems on target, kinda diffrent rhyme shceme that i normaly see.. sorta basic...
Plus How Could I lose to someone whos best is my worst /
your notebook belongs in the can on the curb /
the meta wasnt that hard.. punchs arent that direct and could be a little harder
Lurk around,Search these grounds, ask around everybody will say the same thing....
He thinks he spit fire only cuz the fagget is fuckin flamming /
decent.. a little rewording could have made this a better line
Now hes pacing , waitin for me to paiste my Post /
only to be disapointed cuz once again hes been smoked /
not really much of punchs here... not really connecting
I'm keepin it basic like the smokes / look at his shit,then look at what I wrote
the only way I couldnt have won this battle is if I Had choked /
Nd' posted nothing of my own /
ok ending, could have hit harder... Not really getting the very last line


This battle seemd more like a newbie battle... Boht verses could have worded on certain parts of there verses, but my vote goes to

vote- Michael Maddness
Came a little stronger, flow was a little more on, metas werent that big... both yall were kinda matched, he just pulled out one or two lines better.

Token 01-21-04 03:03 PM

Shenga is DQed for having more than 2 active battles at a time.
Please read rules carefully.

Closed


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