no reply? cmon Hit dis up...

very nice peice...shows good story telling abuility...work on vocab tho...some of the vocab you did use didnt seem like it was fitted well...or just poorly used...good story tho...kinda wants to make me see what happens next...good job

I agree this was a really nice piece.....i enjoyed this......good imagary i thought in this....structure seemed alright in it.....the flow was good overall.....you had alright vocab in it......good story telling....overall a nice piece....keep at it.