RapVerse.com Community - IllConceptz vs. TOoN

Illcon:

His best bets to fold... He says his cards weren't properly-delt,
The only thing you could do to make me laugh is offer-me-help,
Like not being able to stay 'on' topic... this kids spittin 'off'-hand,
If ya punches are 'hittin' then they must be makin a 'soft'-land,
I'd give him a chance... But his credibility is zero, Nobody to fear-though,
I'll serve you for dinner, saved himself from bein eaten and thinks hes a hero,
Must be in denial, but Im just waitin for written proof of this kids wack style,
Fuckin retarded herb... He'll read my verse and begin to think this is a trial,
From the moment you said set it up and pressed reply you was doomed,
Think of him as a pair of *'rabbit ears' cause todays hes gettin "TOONED", *(Bugs Bunny)
Get distinguished like nitro, Devoured by my tight-flow, I'ma phsyco,
Only way you'd be recognized as first is if rapbattles made a typo,

I'd say to work on phrasing, so it comes off a little more street, its readin a little like poetry, too grammatically correct. some personal off his name.

toon:

Like abstinent females its obvious u just dun want none, ill put a dick on ya spine so u can get the ?fuckin nerve? to cock-back a gun//
Ya through, that?s it son, ya lil shit-streek is over, imma send u to the other side like a deadly game of red rover//
U don?t fuck men? Well then I guess yer a fuckin dyke, masturbating to a picture of Jordan is the only way ull ?bust-on-the-mic?(mike)//
It seems u up Shits-crique(creek) witout a fuckin paddle, u got flow like liquid, I guess that?s why u in ?no-shape? to battle//
U might as well become paraplegic cuz ull never hold a microphone, u could have one of yer boyfriends dicks on ya head and still not ?cum-off-the-dome?//
Its like im battling even-steven cuz the odds are against u, u must be proud to be a predominately wack emcee, but ya not one of the few//
Conceptz wrote his verse under a crescent moon cuz his verse is half assed, sendn ya rhymes ta Internal Suspension my verse has yers ?out-classed?//
This fagget sayin he bringin the heat but looks like he forgot the flames, hes stuck in a forward motion cuz he cant ?back-up? wat he claims//
Ya expiration date has past, ya old pre-packaged wackness, cant protect u from this tongue lashing if u were licking prophylactics//
The only type of addict u are is one addicted to smack cuz yer wack, the name Arctic wouldn?t run wit dope if he fuckin peddled crack//

i think too much sex and masturbation metas, some pulled off ok though, but still played topic when overdone. good punchlines, hard metas. rhymes on "wack" can sound played unless part of a multi, like "prepackaged wackness" ok, but didn't like "smack cuz wack". claimin keystyle is lame, cuz it can't be verified so u come off like u sandbaggin. let the verse stand on its own.

vote Toon. had more dope shit.