Voted For: Limited Edition

good job by both.. i really wasnt expecting killah to drop that good.. but it still wasnt enough to take LE.. i really liked le's story and on the other hand killah didnt really have a story.. sounded more like a report... LE's was exciting had good emotion i really liked the peace... good vocab from both.. killah u will be good at topicals if u just get more involved with stories and shit like that.. no hate to either.. good job... pz

Uppin this shit...favors will be returned....werd...

Voted For: Killah.Bwoy

I think killah got this one, I personally prefered his rhyme scheme it was more complexed to me and i liked his imagary, although limited had beta emotion n a beta story i thought killah got this with beta flow, structure and a more complexed verse.....

good from both

peace

This was feedback posted for Killah.Bwoy
 

Sig looks like an anus.. btw ill be by tonight.. yo mom called me :-)

Uppin'............................................

Uppin'............................................

Voted For: Limited Edition

inhale the smoke of my cigarrette...adjust the gun as I walk in the park...
...I am silent as death...my cloak blacker than the shadow of the dark
The path is clear...the mist surrounding the ladder...the ventalation system...
...My life at stake...just as my target...another sniper poised if I miss him
My fingers touch the cold bar of steel...my pulse begins to quicken...
...A silent foot climbs on...the realization of urgency of my mission
What seems like decades...I am at the gaping hole of the air flow shaft...
...The mockery...the sweat...the soft murmur of a person's laugh
I crawl on my stomach...the light ahead of me shows me my entrance...
...I cock the barrely once...and I peer the man who I to seal a death sentance
A happy man...a glass of brandy in hand...his daughter's head in the other...
...The little girl is snuggled with her father...where in the world was her mother?
The happy fat man...sets his glass down, and walks the stairs to the stage...
...My head pulses with my heart beating...I am so nervous and so afraid
The thought in the back of my mind...the other sniper...he was here...
...A flash of a gun barrell...just on the opposite side of the golden chandelier
"We are gathered here tonight..."...begins the happy man's speech...
...My freedom of death...I laughed...so very much in my hand's reach
"...To talk about cancer..."...My finger stops short...of realeasing the bullet...
...The little girl joins her father on the pedastal...Come on, I say to my self...Fulfill it
"My mommy and daddy passed away from cancer...Mr. Johnson is all I have left..."
...A conflict in my mind...the same Mr. Johnson I'm supposed to put to death
My mind races...somebody for that little girl...boy for her that would be nice...
...Then I realize...to fulfill it...it would be my life as a sacrafice
I look again to the other sniper...awaiting for him to release his itching finger...
...That girl's happiness...what I would loose...the insane thoughts linger
I have little time left...If I didn't shoot quick...the other sniper would...
...I am ready to pull the trigger...but I still don't know if I really should
I am trembling...what do I do..? MY FINGER SLIPS!!! SHIT I'M INSANE!!!
...Just as Mr. Johnson drops dead...I hear the bang of a bullet enter my brain...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ LIKE DAMN, GOOD VERSE. I FELT YOUR EMOTION, YOUR FEELIMGS. The way you put your self in the position and wrote it fam. Good creativity here. Imagination was 100% destroyer.




..Assassination fills the poor starving Children of the Iraq Nation..
..Pre-teens Strapped with rifles and grenades, Waiting Patient..
..Mass explosions, Destroy Religeous Buildings, Justice is a must..
..Fellow Military Associates Unable to trust, Automatic's bust..
..Souls Destroyed for Foolishness, Military associates unable to trust..
..Soldiers Droppin' Missiles Launched, Generals devistated, troops cuss..
..automatics fired, Troops dropping Dramaticly, People hungry and tired..
..Forced to walk on foot, 'Rounds shot, Vehicles standin' on flat tires..
..Mentally challenged kids, runnin' infront of live hand grenades..
..Death in this hopeless land, they call home, spreading faster then aids..
..Lifeless heads, stuck on sticks to be exposed, they call this tradition..
..Army rounded at the camp bases, ready to carry out their missions..
..Guerilla warfare, open fire, every style of attack Committed..
..Kids celebratin' as each poor American Troops neck is "slitted"..
..Civilians caught in the crossfire, Innocent Lives Visiously Killed..
..No one bothers to do anything about it,Consider it "thrills"..
..Americans watching the action on tv and think of it as entertainment..
..Arrangements to stop the evil within, but nobody can tame it..
..Naepalms Dropped, Body parts Thrown into the air like rag dolls..
..Bomb threats, Announced everytime people go to the mall..


..Picture yourself in a cammouflage suit, strapped with a rifle..
..And the only thing you can trust, is the words in the bible..
..Put The government in the war, and let's see how well they do..
..Innocent men over there just protecting the gov's ass, I spit truth..
^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Instead of expressing it, you made a statement, which is cool in some topicals battles,but not in this one. You had good flow, nice imaginary, i felt you Talked instead of express.





overall= This goes hands down to Limit. He had an good verse, much creativity. I liked the way he put himself in an position and wrote it. Expressed it FULLY, feelings was deep. Killah your verse was kinda weak a little bit off topic fam. Instead of expressing, you just made an statement. Instead of "KILLING SOMEONE", you went on and on about military. You just went off topic. I give this to Limit just being on topic and with an great verse. Peace

Voted For: Limited Edition

Aiight word, both came with compleatly different styles. On one hand we have LE who used a story writing scheme, and on the other hand we have killah who used a rap that was more vague, which can be dope as fuck and thats what I do a lot in my topicals. However where killah lacked was in his depth of the issue of assasination. I like how you connected it with the government because a lot of the work that hitmen do is to do with government problems during wars where theres a lot more work for them.

However I think you should have researched your topic and gone more deep describing the issue. Even though LE came with a story that would have been easier to write, it had more substance to the lyrics which is why he got my vote.

Peace.

Uppin'............................................ .........

Uppin'.........fuck lets get this closed..........

Uppin'................fuck this has been slept on for a long time...

Uppin'................fuck this has been slept on for a long time...

Voted For: Limited Edition

Aii This Is How I feel

Limited edition Edges This Topical Battle Out and Gets My vote Bcuz clearly He Did very well on Vocabulary And emotions were very deep In His Poem why on Teh other Hand konflictz Came very Basic And I seen alot Of mistakes ans ETC So I Jus Had To give my vote to The better Man At Hand which Is Limited edition

Peace