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-   -   BLACK~MAGIK vs Daubs (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=187379)

King Solo 04-23-05 09:01 AM

well sorry but rhymin the start of one bar and the end of the next dont work for me, i think it is stupid.............its shud be the end of the bars that rhyme

and even still ya punches were not that hard at all..............Daubs still won!!!

Young-Prophecy 04-23-05 01:10 PM

This was feedback posted for Daubs
 
Checking Polls.................................~1~

B. Magik 04-23-05 01:54 PM

Wow...Why would I pre-write for an 8 line battle? lmao...all key'd...Uppin...

Daubs 04-23-05 05:36 PM

uppin this shizzle................................

B. Magik 04-23-05 06:27 PM

^^ What he said...To the motherfuckin roof bitches!!!

TuNiT 04-23-05 06:31 PM

Voted For: BLACK~MAGIK

hey black i peeped yo lass battl 2 an diz wuz much bettr yuh had dem killer linez dat made daubs look reel stupid where az daubz had linez dat dint hit hard an yoi personalz seemed ta go wit da flow an daubz had a few forced linez such az dat show no class line, daubs u jst wanted sumthing 2 rhyme wit glass u should tink linez thru befo u used dem in yo battlz

Daubs 04-23-05 06:36 PM

^your a fool, he had no personals,
you even voted agenst cali vs casper wen it wer obvious.

Da King 04-23-05 11:13 PM

Voted For: BLACK~MAGIK

BLACK~MAGIK ripped it. Way betta punches, multis, and overall way betta flo. Daubs you need to step it up man. that shit was whack.

Vote disqualified for inadequate feedback. Please see this thread if you need help on what qualifies as an acceptable explanation.

B. Magik 04-23-05 11:55 PM

Weerd...thanx for the vote...Uppin for someone to close this shit...1

B. Magik 04-24-05 09:50 AM

Uppin for votes...

Daubs 04-24-05 09:52 AM

^what he said . .

CRiSS-CROSS 04-24-05 10:06 AM

Voted For: Daubs

V/ Daubs, because Majik had played and weak punches and metas.. especially the oven mitt line, and Daubs personals were alot better and hit, but they werent great, only decent..this was really 1 sided but really weak also.. alright 1.

DQ 04-24-05 10:20 AM

Voted For: Daubs

BLACK~MAGIK

I'ma crush this kid, gangsta? Please, you're nothing bitch!
I'm "so hot like stove tops" you "couldn't touch me with oven mits"
^bit of self-glorification but aight opener

I'm grippin' the iron, the trey'll speak, make this faker cease
Then watch this hater "sink" like a "kitchen appliance"
rhyming doesn't work so well in my opinion, no real punch

This man's game's hollow, and it can't stop me dawg
But I will "pop your top" like a "champagne bottle!"
dawg-bottle?nah..no punch again..

You a lame emcee, know better than to play with me
Because ya rhymes "don't make cents" like "broken change machines
^okay closer

Aight, you need to work on some stuff in fact because you didn't really have any hardhitting punches or personals. Got nice wordplay though and your vocab was good as well but some of those rhyming words just didn't work. Structure was good and flow was decent, just fix those rhymes and up your punches, no hate man...


Daubs


Called me out in my own thread,but only if "im not scared"??..*
Bitch you gonna get it now,cuz like the SAS,im always prepared!!
^hehe, nice opener

Ima "shatter" your record, like a brick through glass..**
Called me out like a gansta, but still show no class!!
^good, no real punch though

My punches hit you full in the face, yours barely connect..***
Takes more than battlin 5 newbies......to gain my respect!!
^okay , bit self-glorification but its cool

Your magik like a magician so u make me see things..****
That jus fake shit, kinda like the skill you bring!!
^funny closer

Good verse right here, had some nice punches, few good personals and the vocab was aight. Structure was cool too and had your flow on lock. Now get some more creativity in there and you're set but this was good verse, enjoyable to read and it beat the other cat for sure because you had better and more hardhitting punches!

Please RTF, link's in my sig...


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