RapVerse.com Community

RapVerse.com Community (http://community.rapverse.com/index.php)
-   R.I.T.T II (http://community.rapverse.com/forumdisplay.php?f=337)
-   -   Daubs vs a k w o r d z (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=207487)

Crazy Hades 09-10-05 01:07 PM

Okay, akwordz, whatever.

Given Light. 09-10-05 03:03 PM

SO, vote Daubs?

a k w o r d Z 09-10-05 11:58 PM

Before The Great Collapse

before
the
great
collapse
wake up, how many days've passed, brain is lapsed
massive lasorations, takin back everything that's past
but stays, regaining space in my brain, everytime i pass
it's just pain, lookin back at it, back then, all the magic
we made,but the fact is im half a man, mostly rotten-wasted
contomplatin how all this made us act, and why we're stayin
body language always playin games with me, finally had
enough, stopped talkin, outta options till i found you sobbin
followed my heart, kept walkin, thought about it, left, but kept ponderin
aint been callin 'r saw you for days,caught up in problems
faught over false promises,watchin drama crawl between us,
buildin up walls ... but keep lingering around....
what you talkin bout collapsin...why dont you think we're down?
chah blah hah hanh....
bar minimum
blah blah blah
keyed, good luck


akwordz

Daubs 09-11-05 05:59 PM

safe


votes...

Daubs 09-12-05 10:49 AM

.................................................. ..........

Dervla 09-12-05 10:39 PM

Daubs- Ok nicly done Daub.Not creative nor original. The Imaginary was ok could be upp a little bit and the emotion was ok also..you really need to get into the Topic and write it all out...There was no vocab so don't worry about that. The only problem with this verse was that you had a little detailed imaginary and Much being talked about in your verse.

Akwordz- Ok..This was weak...The imaginary wasn't very detailed it wasn't average it wasn't great it was weak. The Emotion wasn't there I couldn't feel anything in the your words. Vocab wasn' there which you don't really need it..But um the weakest category you've came in was Imaginary and Emotion plus devoloping a good creative concept. Your verse wasn't much entertaining and didn't interested me..

Conclusion- I felt that Duabs take this because he had a better detailed Imaginary and a little once of Emotion. Um..I didn't vote for akwords because he came completly out of Topic...It was boring it didn't really kept interested..The Concept wasn't very good too..

V/Daubs

Daubs advances


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 04:27 PM.