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-   -   Life! (Dragon Wrekordz collab) (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=33919)

Domain 9 03-16-03 11:36 PM

Although I don't really feel this collab was necessarilly slept on I DO think you got quite a bit of shitty replies... I'll throw mine in the mix though...

Here is a line from Sinikal I was really feelin b/c it's so damn true...

looking out the window seeing 9 year olds dressed in skirts above their knees/what the fucks this world coming to?

Here is a line from Omega that stuck out...

i wish i could take ma life n re-mould if the truths told the Truth hurts n to darkness i'm so addicted whoever thought ma life could b written in a thousand words or drawn in a picture but i dont wanna b a fixture thats why i write these skriptures n come equipped wit lyrix to add to the mixture

^I have no clue where your lines began and ended so I picked up a lot extra but I liked the thousand words and a picture thing you had going on...

Here is what ya need to do though...

In Omega's case... don't write in paragraph form, instead add a "/" at the end of every line such as Sinikal did but hit enter after the "/" so we'll read it easier. I also just told Sinikil was she needed to do right there... Hit enter.

That's about all I saw wrong with this piece is was hot as hell but it would have been MUCH better on Omega's part if I could catch onto his flow but I didn't know where to put and emphasis. Good collab guys.

pz

Farenheit 03-17-03 10:09 AM

damn, thnx 4 that reply D-9 much appreciated, i kno how ya feel bout the /'s i only seem 2 use em in ma battles, well the enter key n e way....

thnx again B....


OMEGGGGGGGGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA'SSSSSS COMIN 4 YALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL...
:D

MeNTiLL 03-17-03 10:27 AM

This collab was coo.....Nic drop from both.....A few deep felt lines.....Good job peeps.....Keep it up.....Peace

Pø!$Øn 03-17-03 10:31 AM

NICE!! i was really feeling this peice man. keep doing yo thang. A.I. for lif.

~1~

Farenheit 03-17-03 02:46 PM

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! Mentill replied i'm so honoured or wtf ever how ya spell it, fire it up n rep disssssssssssssssss, 1 luv im off 2 c westwood.............

*~BaKardii~* 03-17-03 02:52 PM

Dayum I likes that in ya'll...that collabo was striking and everything was on point I liked the way ya'll vibed on this one it was beyond good!!! I aint been here in a while seems I been missing a lotta shyt huh (smile) anyway to SiniKil dayum mami you holdin it down for the femcee's I likes that in ya....keep doin whutcha do tho and holler atcha gurl
*~Holler~*

Swift 03-18-03 12:01 AM

tight rhymes nice flow dat shit was real clean dawg and deep i feel both ya shit life is hard as fuck sumtimes ya kept on da topic hard shit to do ya got da skillz dis industry needs stay elevatin both ya
>>>one<<<

Farenheit 03-18-03 08:34 AM

hey bakardi mami, u dont remember me? *cries* lol welcome back n thnx 4 the reply....

holla.....

ps thnx swift...lol...

The 13th Apostles 03-18-03 04:39 PM

It was aight, but i didn't read the whole thing, the paragraph form of your bars was blinding me...work on verse structure...

7/10

P.e.a.c.e.

ScottIWA 03-18-03 04:58 PM

i like that shit...keep it up

Farenheit 03-21-03 05:24 AM

thnx 4 replies......we got a new piece comin soon....


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