hey this is a gud one! i liked how there was no exact rhyme pattern but just THERE and it all comes together. keep it up

you have a very open imangeray, and show it well throu this piece. very detailed and seems to be carefuly written, focusing not so much on the over all structure but on each line, and its impact. your message may not come across loud and clear, but its a deep thinking poem, thats not all that simple. your outro to this piece i thought was well written too, i liked the imangeray there.

~Tera~
DONT HATE

^ no hate just madd love

-UPPin-

This was a great piece..kind of scattered in a way but very uniform in another way..Very intense and thought provoking message and some lines were just outstanding...

"i see no expression in beauty
only how it hurts those that it hasn't found"

"yet i stand so cold and so alone
my breathe is seen as smoke in the cold air
only to do nuttin but dissappear"

Very intriguing and well written..
Stay up, nice writez.

^ mucho Gratsie
a fan of your stuff too