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but its funny how this wasn't upped for more than a day, but for some reason you go and pick out my battle

i guess people just dont appreciate orgininality these days =/

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Voted For: artÃ-stica~Mente

This was a hard one to vote on.. Both of you stretch your lines like theres no tomorrow ---------________--------- Stretched lines makes these things REAL long and tedious to read.. But to be honest, I was feeling tweetys verse more. I understood where she was comming from and the story painted a more clear image than what I could pick up on when I was reading daub's verse..

I can’t believe I was hypnotized by you, and tightly bound in your spell till December

^That was a nicly put together line..
Only things you needa work on with topicals is to try and make them into more of a rap song, use more multis, dont stretch lines and remember to only write stuff you would spit on a track. Best way to do this, is just by playing a beat and writing to it as if your writing a song.

Daubs your shit was good, it was just at times I didnt know where you were going with it, I realise you were talking about a fling with some chick, but you would of benefitted from using clearer references, like actually telling the story mixed in with the emotions you were trying to express. Wasnt a bad topical though and you beat tweety on rhyming technique only slightly. But the overall vote has to go to tweety..

Just dont write as stretched lines next battle rofl :(

.................Lol @ Daubs............................It's drakel you fool. Lol Uppin

Yeah my bad, just woke up.. I'm braindead for names :( soz drakel..

hmm, didn't think my lines were too stretched....cause it all flowed.......but word

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Voted For: artÃ-stica~Mente

wow nice topicals from the both of u both did good imagery was both had the imagery and the vocab the words were very emotional as well both brung that i yall verses yo u both did good but really at the end is so much as a tie but i do have to pick a winner so.....tweety.....u had alot of imagery and just a good amount of that made u win this toipical dont get me wrong drakel did good but didnt have that many as tweety and also......tweety u had also the emotion build there just work a little more on vocab ok......thats all and drakel just work a lil more on ur emotions.....ok but u did do good on vocab.......


so keep it up u both.......

v/ tweety aka artistica mente........