Teenage Love? Feedbacks
 

Aye sport, here's a thought from the old school crew
A serious situation we all go threw
It deals wit your feelins, so here what I say
It's like a dyke, but nothing seems to go your way
Bust this, two people, they really like each other
He says their's no one else
And she claims they're is no other
The feelins are same, and you receive a notion
To reveal your inner thoughts deeply hit emotions

Precious times, hopin they won't end
Tell your mother bout your lover
Or so your best friend
Ya mighty proud while your holdin her hand
Boys, yo that's my woman, and girls, yeah that's my man
This pressure brings a sort of warmth to ya heart
And everything seems so great at the start
For she loves him, and he also loves her
And it's hard to turn back to who the person you were
But later on, problems start to occur
And the bond, which combines, y'all turn into a blur
For the feelins were the same, now here's the score
You love him to much, and they don't love him anymore
Or did you have to choose a number
Or because your not bein true
Or maybe they're just plain sick of seein you
Word, now it might seem strange
You better take his quick, and make the right change


See just when you swore, the boy was wrong and
Then they're gone, and part of ya heart's been stolen
Get back on your feet, wit a hop and a skip
But no, you rather go wit this dead relationship
Hangin around, and buyin him stuff
You seem him every darn day, you don't see him enough
You follow them around, and they claim ya hawkin
When conversation comes, you do all the talkin
Not to mention, attention, we all need a bit
Behind ya back they're sayin, yeah he's all on my tits
They're gettin sick of you, and quite annoyed
And if you had plans for the future, they're now destroyed
You saw what was happenin, and you still let it
And if you ever let him make love to ya girl, you can forget it
Sweetheart, you been caught, spread around town
Passin then ya thoughts
And break up time, and your recitine the words
Yo this is fromt the heart, and I know the part hearts
Get over it, from now don't take short slick
If it's not true love, you shouldn't deal wit it
Just think of your future, and what is to above
And pay attention to the words that's in this song of love

what do yall think can yall look

nice...nice...solid spit...poetry in motion if you ask me...but im just a newbie...what the fuck do i know...

i like your style...pure emotion...peace

lol not really.........Even if ya are thanks for takin the time to read it and nobody else will

aww, that was so nice!! lol, That was really good #I read it all the way through...Whens the sequal?? Thast was well gd!
xxx1xxx

Thanks...........Im tryin to be the best open Mic person......Im goin to start doin this more often....aight thanks........Lets get some more....^^

goin to probably be put up soon........Probably be ready for it though....probably wont be one....just think ahead

^^^

uppin

uppin

i really liked that..that showed alot of emotion and alot of skill..on da reals..keep this up it's something different..and it's very smart how u rhymed it *ones*

SB

Thanks spoken.......Keep elevatin girl

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

comeone lets get some feedbacks...............

uppin

man that was awsoem very hot man do sum more stuff

that's a tite ...showed emotion and it kept on topic......7/10

Thanks lets uppin this....

uppin

Rhymes were played wasnt really feelin this to much.

5.323/10

I think it was good and unholy your the only wun that thinks its wack.....So that lets people know that you a hater.....and get mad when something is betta then yours...Just stop hatin for a change is what im sayin

No beef....Aight....
Dont talk stuff about me I just tell ya what I think...But No beef..So dont go arguing to me.....Both cool aight no beef

uppin

I need a lighter to wave in the air.

Put ya boots on everybody, its gettin deep in here.

Nice stuff, Waitin for da followup

uppin

i liked it, it showed u n your emotion stay up 8/10

uppin

You do wanna stay in A.I right?U asked for Feedback i gave U Feedback Idiot.Why Would i hate i dont evan Have OM's.

damn that really wasnt what i was expecting, the thought was there but the lyrics could use some fuckin work

yea not that great, i mean good concept but ya need to improve

shut the hell up you noobs...You just agreein with unholy wun...LOOk at the other peoples post Then you decide...Dont let him Choose you dicision..Next time Noobs look at the Other Replys..

Yea It Was OK, Could Expand The Vocabulary Abit Thought, Nice Topic.

uppin

Wow that's Dumb Poeple dont look at other Poeple's Replys to Decide what they Think about what they have Read.Man poeple seem to Lose Intelligance more and more EveryDay.

lol aight.....UPpin

uppin

uppin

uppin
 

uppin, im a follower not a leader,
i dont see shit here wit a weena.
so peace out here come da cleana
:shoot:
duck that shit bitch
talkin shit like u rich

Mafia Soldier
 

Clever and curious ryhmes, smart too good job!!!!