the "funny stuff that happens in clubs" thread
 

just a thread dedicated to the dumb shit that goes on in clubs sometimes. for instance,


16 year old townies wearing their older brother's shirts, school trousers and shoes, nursing a bottle of wkd which they aint gonna keep down anyway. come on guys, you aint fooling anybody.

the girls in the low cut tops who get offended when guys star at them, i think girls should lose the right to be pissed-off at guys looking at their breasts when they're struggling out of the dress.

the well-dressed versace guys who sidle up to girls with god-awful chat-up lines which at best get them laughed out, at worst forcefully exited out the club by the bouncers. i was in this one place about 3 years ago and one of these versace guys walked up to this girl, tapped her on the shoulder and said.........."i've got a waterbed."....stood there for a moment, then said "i'm sorry" and walked away. dumb fucker.

guys who perform dance routines together which they've obviously been working on during the week back home. guys.....you look gay, cut it out.

dancing generally, dunno about the yank places, but in britain most of the most who aren't doing the "turn around slowly in a circle pressed-together and cop off" dance are doing the "moving as little as humanly possible to be considered dancing" dance.

girls who get pissed off when they've dancing front to back with a guy and he gets a hard-on. i mean, come on, what were you expecting? you're pissed-off coz he finds you attractive?


thoughts?

hmmm... when a chick asks you to buy her a drink.... and her friend one too.. and walks away.. right after.


i always see this shit happening.

lmao at the WKD .. my sister drinks that bullshit .. haha ..


when girls are like, their looking at you, but their scared to come over and say shit .. so you have to go over and start the conversation .. haha . and she's w. like .. 3 or 4 of her friends so you dont really want to be like .. "you wanna fuck?" .. but you dont really want to know her either. Thats messed up.

Or this has happened twice ..

you go out, get drunk as hell .. and next morning you wake up nextto some chick and you dont remember ANYTHING of the night before, its all blank apart frm when ypu were sober .. lmfao .. damn .. ive got too many bad experiencves w. alchohol .. when i start drinking .. i dont stop till im wasted. = )

When you sit at the bar, ask for a tall, frosty glass of Egg Nog (lay off the nut-meg) & the Bartender gives you a dirty look. . The simple knowledge that his daughter's EZ-Bake Oven seems to have been "misplaced" humors me, Johnny.

^ WOW - ITS REALLY HIM!

oh yeah, and girls who look at you liked you ran over their cat coz you asked them their NAME. what the fuck is that? i didnt ask you to have my babies bitch, i aint proposing, i just wanted to know your name so i could TALK to you. that really pisses me off, when people put their best gear on, fork out a wad of cash for drinks and spend the whole evening TALKING TO PEOPLE THEY HANG AROUND WITH ANYWAY. and when someone tries to get something rolling they get called a twat for trying to socialise in a club, wtf?

If it is, He Spelt his Name Wrong.


Who Woulda Thought on my 2000th Post I Would be Correcting Santa's Name

word too 2000 posts


when i hit 10 k ima retire this name and start posting as another one, lol.

when i go to clubs ...wait....i dont go to clubs....

YAY methane got 2000 posts.

^ Go to hell, it's my alias. By the way, say goodbye to your "American Idol: Behind the Scenes" photo-book. Wisenheimer!

YAY IM 2-2 LMAO!!!!!!!!!

Does this Mean I Grow Hairs on My Secret Place?

wow santa blessed my thread, hey man, can i get a lapdance and a blowjob from a pair of big-titted swedish twins for christmas? i'll be a good boy next year i promise.

when guys try to start dancing with a girl, and she walks away... most try to play it off... thats always entertaining

the worst part about the clubs i have been to is that everyone looks like a damn porcupine and they have on weird ass jewelry and dance like uhmmmm....... I dont know but these people must be clubbers or something
peace

...Ya' Hommie Gets Into Trouble And Is About To Be Thrown Out...
...And You Are Two Minutes Away From Takin' The Bitch To A Motel...
...You Gotta Leave Ya' Hommie...

i dont know how it is wherever you guys are from, but i hate it when i see a group of females outside the club. and i yell.. "hey shawty" (in my best southern voice). WHY IN THE BLUE HELL THE FAT ONE OR THE UGLY ONE TURN AROUND?

chciks who are drunk and fall over....................haha
funny stuff.......

shit when you go to girls and like hey girl whats your name and talk for a while.. then your like you wanna dance and their like naw i'm dancing with my friends.. so you go ask one of her friends to dance and they say yes.. :)

oh ya...
i like it when guys are really drunk and start grinding with a girl and they just look at him shake their head and walk off.. its called respect atleast ask before you stick your erection as close to her ass as possible

i never ask, i just plant it, LMAO^^

guys who have to "take a hit for the team" and go dance/socailise with the ugly girl coz his mates are getting in with the fine ones

people who pays for drinks with a fistfull of change, you fucking tramps.

middle aged men and women trying to recapture their youth by turning up in a club and no-one talks to them...or even makes eye contact.

what clubs have you bee ngoing to? i wanna go

ever guy in the place wearing the same make of shoes, get some originality guys.

3 pints goddesses; these are girls who, after 3 pints of lager or bottles of tart fuel (alcopops) believe they are goddesses for men to worship. they usually entails loud singing of cheesy pop songs (its raining men and anything by s-club), dance moves youd would expect to see on the set of a fucking jerry springer episode and high lifted arms drenched in sweat from the club lights. in a word....urrrrrgg.

^LMAO!

Skinny bouncers...

Who later turn out to be supernaturally strong.

^those suck!

roflmfao..

I only go to them teens only clubs..but from my experince..I'd say this..

when you with a girl or somethin..and yall laughin..and then you jus happen to notice another nigga starin at you dead in yo face..so..you get a bottle..and nreak off the bottle and go for his throat..then his friends jump in it..and so you duck and weave to the left..and do a high kick..and he falls and knocks over 2 of his own friends..then the guy that was starin gets up..and he's the leader..so he's the strongest and he knoew's kung fu moves..so his fists are swingin really really fast..and you're dodgin them..with punches jus missin your face..until you see an openin and you strike him in the stomach..and he crumbles around your fist and hit the floor...

dont yall hate that?

The fine girl's cockblocken ass friends! Thats who I hate. The fat or ugly chick that ain't getting no attention, thats alwasy the one ready to go or some shit.....

Like last night, I had the chick bagged for the night for sure, This fine ass bow-legged dark skin, she looked like Tiffiny off that BET countdown shit...anyway. She was feelin me, at least the way I look so all I had to do is talk to her to finish it off. Eveytime a got around to her (the club was crowded as fuck last night for x-mas) Her fat ass friend was like "girl, lets go!" or 'we gotta get ready to go" some shit like that. The fine girl said she was the one driving so she couldn't just leave her friend like that..I still got her number, she told me to call her later, but still. I wanned to end my night fucking with her, cuz she might ot even be as fine after you see her without the liquor in your system and the dim club lights, yaknow...

But I really don't even fuck with clubs that much no more, only time a go is like on some PR shit, to promote my company..

when bouncers hit people 12 times smaller than them...............LOL............

i jus hope i never get hit :(

LMAO! .. its funny cause it's true ..

LMAO,
i know u was out christmas eve, an wanna ask!!!
how many of them bitches appeared from no where???
damn

grown men that look like their mum dressed them, they crack me up.

fat girls who wear thongs which you can see above the too-tight pants they wear. they're always off to one side as well. its like a train wreck coz you WANT to look away...but you cant.

bartenders who always serve the girls in the low cut tops even if you got their 5 minutes before them. fucking pricks.

ya d-dizzle is right.. I could see a fine girl and she be all up and staring and shit then you talk and then the fatgirl or butt ugly.. their roles are both the same.. think since they aint getting play their friend shouldn't either.. thats what I use a wingman for its awesome haha.. then he sees the 2 im going for and tries to duck.. but shit the ugly girl sees him and then its like a friggen hippo hunting the way she takes off after my friend haha

I enjoy the fights...one second your dancing the next second a girls shirt is off ond half her hair is gone.....

you fight with girls :shocked:

[color=blood red]When A Physically Handicapped (1 Leg, Midget, No Arms, Etc.) Person Leaves With 2 Or More Chicks.......







That Shit Is Funny....[/color]

aha yeah.....................or a guy of 40 getting off wit a girl of 18 lol.................sh*t wait, that aint funny, its fu*king ugly, an it aint right..........arrrrr!

When the drink supplier, better known as a bar tender..
Flirts with girls..n 'offers' them all these exspensive..
Tropical..coctail like drinks..


Then later on confronts them with a 40$ bill..

i see alot of people tryin to dance like justin timberlake thats funny as hell especially when they are drunk

A line of tough guys wearin' fake Gucci & other big brand remakes..
Gettin denied n arguein' with the head bouncer..

Then a person in a weelchair rolls by..n rolls in..

^^^all fuckin true, thats another thing i always see as well