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-   -   Corrupted Visions:Commercial vs Underground{A Must Read} (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=106588)

Penskills 01-13-04 05:09 PM

Commercial vs Underground{A Must Read}
 
This is a drop for everyone. Whether you like the South,North,East,West,Underground or Commercial shit...Read and learn.

Intro:
Hip Hop's a disgrace...it's the fakes that blow shit out of context
It's the 'b-boy' dot com vets, and chatroom writers givin tips on being 'complex'
It's the kids with bomb threats, the gangsters who flaunt techs, it's the CD rom 'decks'
It's calm text...and congress, and online orders from moms checks

The Commercial Head:
Yea kid...I was raised by a single and stressed mother
So of course that's my excuse, why I disrespect others
Rap is my life...I dedicate what I have to slain soldiers
Those who lived cash,women, and jewelry stained molars
A fool to get played nowhere, what's a rapper without glamour and glits?

The Underground Head:
Does it matter you prick?

The Commercial Head:
Yea!

The Underground Head:
I wouldn't be caught dead listening to Hammer and shit
They conduct themselves in which they need caliber clips to manage a diss
I can't stand it you bitch, underground is the foundation of my religion
The roots of Hip Hop, a line of division, which seperates skill from corporate bullshittin
A destructive cataclysm, which is Rap...that violent shit
Skills are vile kid, in order to make it, it's a style switch
Rawness and mildness...Hip Hop vs. Rap
You kids cop worthless crap about burstin caps
Which is for certain wack...
The day I buy platinum cd's is when the earth is flat, and I'm starring in sideshow circus acts
You hurtin cats...It's 'skill', you ever heard of that?

The Commercial Head:
Yea...but what's the purpose that propells them to service Rap?

The Underground Head:
The Love!

The Commercial Head:
If they ain't earnin stacks, then think again on who's really worthless jack?
If it's not concernin cash, why bother? Respect means shit in the long run
I'd rather make a mill, and get the women after song one

The Underground Head:
Your'e wrong dun, I'd rather be broke and have a whole lotta respect
Because the rich and skilless MC's I no longer accept
It takes so long to perfect, but money corrupts the love and sooner or later blinds their older sights
To do it for the love, they become blinded by the solar lights
Gimmicks which eventually finish, then diminish in the minutes overnight
Their molars might reflect sales...gold cd's and big screen tv's
But the real MC's don't need G's, even though we're the endangered species

The Commercial Head:
The reasons are simple kid, we rap about the struggles of certain types
The black youth...But a suburbanite person like yourself, who knows nothing about the urban life
We may curse and fight, but in the end, we unite and urge our rights
Submerged in fright, but released when we hit the platinum state
Riding in Mercedes with crazy ladies, chargin credit to the maximum rate
But it's all love...we now become the all time phat cats
As for you...all I can say is enjoy life as a lab rat

The Underground Head:
A lab rat?
Because we're abstract?
Unoriginal concepts...now that's wack
We're the roots of Hip Hop: fat laces, kangol, and back packs
We may cruise in hatchbacks and live without fat stacks
But Rap's crap...And as we move on, we'll have positive flashbacks

The Commercial Head:
You'll eventually diminish...like the straps on your knapsack
You crab cats, don't even pack gats

The Underground Head:
Only spray cans and fat caps
So that's that...Graffiti bombing, street galleries of diversity
It hurts to see, that purposely my cultures dying amongst the birds and trees
It's eurkin me, how you diss the very foundation of your obsession...

The Commercial Head:
But you diss the very legends who made a living off their progression...
Here's a confession...originality comes from persistance and heart
Not what the media possess or expressess from a list or a chart
I admit the arts got watered down, but it struggles to help the hurt youth
Money is a virtue which helps the struggles that we exert through

The Underground Head:
I urge you...It's persuasion, 99% of the rappers don't wallow in gold
Ans as we follow the scroll, your blindfold swallows you whole
Hollows your soul...bottles your globe...
But still manage to follow your goals
And one thing...set restrictions on your sights and never lose it
I'm so Hip Hop, I got a hat and a t-shirt to prove it
You could blow up overnight, and by the weekend lay secluded
Stay up rooted...Have high goals, gain respect and pay your dues
And stay away from fools, with estates and jewels
Because their statements prove, they're persuading you
...To sign with them, and dine with them
Given diamond pens, but your mind is dense
And your rhymes are dead with no lines to send...

Traidmarx 01-13-04 05:28 PM

goddamn this shit was off the chain sick... loved the way you played both sides in this piece right here shit was real orginal keep doin ya thing and if you ever wanna do a collab hit me up

Menik 01-14-04 03:08 AM

Yeah this was real nice man....i enjoyed the read....you had a good concept i thought....the content in this was pretty good also....you had some nice multies through out this piece, liked that....the flow of this was good, it stayed on point and flowed pretty smoothly i thought....you had some nice vocab in this as well...overall this was a nice drop....keep at it.

Emerge 01-14-04 04:02 AM

im not gonna diminish this piece by dropping some shallow feedback

all i got to say is....

Legends

Maven 01-14-04 08:43 AM

oh wow....this was really unexpected, as I haven't read much of your work.
the first surprise was the length...it went really in depth into a topic that so many have failed to make dope. I really enjoyed that bit.
the next surprise was that you seemed to get the gist of both worlds....but there was no grey area. Are you trying to say that commercial and underground don't have anything in common?
anyways...the only thing that could use some work was the flow. try to even out the syllable counts in your lines, makes for a better read and a better rap.

MD_killa 01-14-04 09:31 AM

Ayo son this shyt was super MAD sick to the fullest... multis and concept creativaty... everything was there... and i must agree with emerge...

Lengends

Lethargic 01-14-04 12:50 PM

I don't break down pieces....I don't even reply...I just browse. So, to get a reply from me in here is an accomplishment. Dope shit kid.

Penskills 01-14-04 03:17 PM

..Thanks for replys...Uppin... :gfy:

ELEETE 01-14-04 04:01 PM

FUCK!!!! THIS IS PROBABLY THE ILLEST PIECE I HAVE EVER READ ON RB. NO DOUBT ABOUT THAT. Yo you had my mind glued to this shit! Ima have to show my crew this piece cause this is some real shit. I aint D* riddin or anything but when a piece is this good you gotta show respect to the writer an let em know how it is for real. If i knew what else to say i would. just plain SICK...........


But it's all love...we now become the all time phat cats
As for you...all I can say is enjoy life as a lab rat

The Underground Head:
A lab rat?
Because we're abstract?
Unoriginal concepts...now that's wack
We're the roots of Hip Hop: fat laces, kangol, and back packs
We may cruise in hatchbacks and live without fat stacks
But Rap's crap...And as we move on, we'll have positive flashbacks

----THAT SHIT WAS ILL RIGHT THERE---

FEEDBACK APPRECIATED
INFLUENCE
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=93118

HanZ oFF 01-15-04 12:28 AM

yo this shit was mega ill cuz...the concept of the peice was xcellent....it goes to show that no matter wut hip hop or rap the art has madd love...the multies n structure was done sik yo...i jus got to this board n i see rymes like these...HOLLA BAK

Penskills 01-15-04 08:51 AM

..uppin...

-uski- 01-16-04 11:02 PM

this was a good piece i thought It was really Good...i think ya Structure was a Bit off but it was still good...i think ya flow was One of ya best thing in this piece herre....all and all man this was a real good Piece i think ya Gonna do well....PeacE....

Penskills 01-19-04 02:19 PM

.Thanks for the replies..

LA4Lyfe 01-19-04 06:38 PM

yo nigga at first i thought u was wack an then i read
dis shit an it was str8 fire, one of if not da best piece
ive read up 2 date
keep up, peace

Penskills 01-20-04 12:53 PM

..Fuck you~~reply~~~

~Yo What Up~ 01-21-04 10:02 PM

damn homie this shit is fire............i was really feelin the imagery.........and the mutlis.........it flowed well from one line to the next..........the topic was tight, while many cats have tried, this is the first one ive seen that actually made a hot drop wit that topic........u should get into topical shit dawg, cause u mad ill..........

mc aines 01-22-04 12:07 PM

dis shit was hot pen i liked it and enjoyed readin.....u had good flow and multis wording of words was ight aswell all round it was dope i enjoyed the read

w_n 01-22-04 03:10 PM

eveything waz dope now read mine

Verbal Kent 01-23-04 11:12 AM

If anyone is sleepin on Penskills... You are fuckin retarded... Kid is hot...


this is probably the most indepth piece I've seen... It's about time someone on this site posted something with meaning...


Keep this up...



Avalon...

Tommy the 45 01-23-04 11:23 AM

Nice...I really liked this one, any kind of rap listener would enjoy this 'cos it covers all aspects of it.

rule 01-23-04 05:29 PM

This was a very moving piece. a lot of good vocab and excellent flow. your metas and similies were worded good. definitly a great read.

Thnks for the feedback on mine...this was an enjoyable read.

Keep it up.

Penskills 01-23-04 10:00 PM

..This thing is 10days old and I'm still getting love..thanks... :evilgrin:

MC PINACLE 01-25-04 02:10 PM

*Bao-ba Bao-ba......heart stops*
This was....this cant be put in words, no reply can sum this up perfectly...You musta been smoking the same thing Nas was when he made Illmatic...Nah, but this was insane. Nice multies, brilliant...Quote:Brilliant idea for a song...nice flow, good overall metaphor and wordplay....*bows down and worships* lol, Dope piece....

TonyStubaH n H2o 01-25-04 03:26 PM

some good shit Penskills

Penskills 01-27-04 11:57 AM

Uppin this..cause I can...^^

Gunman tha Great 01-27-04 12:03 PM

no u can't now stop saying shit i say b4 i shoot you with my E-gun

Dev 01-27-04 12:58 PM

i think this is one of your best peices ive read.... you handled the topic well and came at it strong... with a smooth flow... really got it across, i just sont like the 'centering' of the text... but good drop..... hit my latest

FanTa ZeE 01-27-04 01:26 PM

i was hoping that my reply would tell you something that you could value, something that somebody else hadn't already said..but i can't, all i will say is this..

I Love It..definition of Dope....

Penskills 01-27-04 06:42 PM

^thanks.....I'm flattered.....

Penskills 01-28-04 12:39 PM

uppin this..cause I can... :evilgrin:

THE DALABIL 01-28-04 12:59 PM

"I urge you...It's persuasion, 99% of the rappers don't wallow in gold
Ans as we follow the scroll, your blindfold swallows you whole
Hollows your soul...bottles your globe...
But still manage to follow your goals"
You know how you finally get something soooo good you stop for fear of F---ing up what you had if you'd left it alone? I'm through reading for the day. Hell probably for the week. I'm on my way to do something else now. Lesson for all on the "Order of being an Emcee". Depth, content, style, history, multi's, punches, protecting the art, dissing the destroyers...yea...yea. I wish in something this tight you'd mentioned The Lord somewhere to bring it all together. But that's just hating. We all got our places right?

Penskills 01-30-04 12:27 PM

I just felt like uppin this...let's get 400 views~~Hoo~~Ray~~~

WORD~PERFECT 01-30-04 12:51 PM

I Feel This When I First Did This Topic No One Would Collab It With Me So I Had To Use Both Influences And In My Opinion You Really Exposed Where My Verses Lacked.this Came Very Strong And Had Few Weaknessess.

Unknown Skillz 01-30-04 01:45 PM

NIce one man true skillz right dere............................

Penskills 02-02-04 09:15 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Emerge
im not gonna diminish this piece by dropping some shallow feedback

all i got to say is....

Legends

:laugh2: thanks..(but this got denied... :shocked: )

Penskills 02-05-04 10:15 AM

feel like uppin all my shit...


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