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Unwritten Hazard __vs__ illtalic
12 lines..
due in an hour.. i'll post first.. no feedin.. same old same old.. check in soon as ya see this.. |
i spit, rip, then i vanish........... posting fake votes in the ballot///
im getting votes from illtalic....using eleborate tactics to become a HAZARD fanatic// what a faggot, tryin to front, imma leave you soaked like a pump in a swamp/// then make "iLLtalic" bleed, like ink from a "font"// your avatar says "really is that gully"// he probably ment to type "REALLY IM UGLY"// you got nothing, like the "projects" im buring your "garbage" fast/// really fag, i wouldnt let you "blow me" if your were an atomic blast/// this kids a "JOKE", he should change his name from illtalic to "COMIC" sans 9 lines should be sufficient l |
fuck an hour, KEY somthin
Today, 07:04 AM illtalic Today, 07:16 AM Unwritten Hazard |
The Chemist already dropped u .. now im makin sure ya really hurt
the past is the same as ya future.. dead an buried beneath the dirt… Style resembles ya heroes.. a long forgotten boy band I’ll call u Justin.. cos outta Sync ya clapped by ya own hand… So drop ya 2 cents.. ya can even drop nickels an dimes But like big nosed coke addicts I’ll simply hoover ya lines… Cos Illtalic’s the Harold Shipman of RB.. ‘Dr Death’ will do fine im performin talent transplants.. so now ya ass is really mine… The votes'll never be in ur favor kid.. no one understands ya vibe cos scratchin at the surface of talent DOES NOT make u a Scribe... Nicca I'll plant ya face on the side of the road.. so ya constantly see the curb Breedin slurs.. call this bitch a Root.. he has to elevate jus to be a Herb... |
lol nice
i like the ending we should have went like 20 lines so i coulda used "im more "BOLD" then illtalic" or "your not ILL-talic, your just ILL-iterate" or somthing like that, good battle, uppn 4 votes |
Unwritten ~
i spit, rip, then i vanish........... posting fake votes in the ballot/// im getting votes from illtalic....using eleborate tactics to become a HAZARD fanatic// not a bad use of multis, nice opener what a faggot, tryin to front, imma leave you soaked like a pump in a swamp/// then make "iLLtalic" bleed, like ink from a "font"// hmm..ok, ok..i feel ya here.. your avatar says "really is that gully"// he probably ment to type "REALLY IM UGLY"// kinda the corny humor..so so you got nothing, like the "projects" im buring your "garbage" fast/// really fag, i wouldnt let you "blow me" if your were an atomic blast/// this kids a "JOKE", he should change his name from illtalic to "COMIC" sans very creative closer, liked the last line, lol ~~ illtalic ~ The Chemist already dropped u .. now im makin sure ya really hurt the past is the same as ya future.. dead an buried beneath the dirt… ehh, wasnt feeling this.. Style resembles ya heroes.. a long forgotten boy band I’ll call u Justin.. cos outta Sync ya clapped by ya own hand… lol! So drop ya 2 cents.. ya can even drop nickels an dimes But like big nosed coke addicts I’ll simply hoover ya lines… wasnt feelin it...sorta...wack Cos Illtalic’s the Harold Shipman of RB.. ‘Dr Death’ will do fine im performin talent transplants.. so now ya ass is really mine… good general diss..not a personal though.. The votes'll never be in ur favor kid.. no one understands ya vibe cos scratchin at the surface of talent DOES NOT make u a Scribe... hmmmm....so so at best.. Nicca I'll plant ya face on the side of the road.. so ya constantly see the curb Breedin slurs.. call this bitch a Root.. he has to elevate jus to be a Herb... second line was good lol Damn, overall, this was actually close. But but but...reading it over again, I liked Unwritten's approach better. You were both equal with flow, structure, illtalic..you spit any multis? maybe in the closer, might be stretching it... Anyways, Ima have to give this to Unwritten, but overall, this was a really good battle, you 2 should consider a rematch... Vote ~ Unwritten |
Hit this up...sry, forgot to post it..
Gracias.. http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=114599 |
Damn at not puttin 'no herbish votes' in the rules.. oh well.
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Man, I'm just giving my honest opinon man, damn.
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^werd 2 illtalic that was gay..lmfao............
rite ill took this wateva man its clear , unwritten you had some really nice wordplay, but your verse was newbish man no hate but, wats all the * // for leave em out next time, also your punches were ok but they didnt hit as hgard ad ill's, ill had a much better strucutre and flow also, v-ill.......................... plz hit this up now http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...55&page=2&pp=15 thx alot no hate........ |
Someone on my wavelength!
Wahey! |
thanks/// 4 ////the ///vote//
lol i smell a rematch |
unwritten-u didnt really have any decent punches in ya verse......u had some nice flow and multies but u didnt have hard punches...that is the main part of a battle...also u need to stop putting "" around ya words that is newbish....overall below average verse....4/10
illtalic-decent verse.....u had consistancy and a few nice punches....i liked your closer it was real creative....u took this battle wit more creativity and consistancy...overall decent verse.......6/10 v/illtalic |
-uppn-
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in my opinion i think illtalic took this
punches: ill But like big nosed coke addicts I’ll simply hoover ya lines… Cos Illtalic’s the Harold Shipman of RB.. ‘Dr Death’ will do fine personals: ill The votes'll never be in ur favor kid.. no one understands ya vibe cos scratchin at the surface of talent DOES NOT make u a Scribe... flow: both had aight structure but ills was better structure: ill had better because his were about even overall i gotta go with illtalic peep mine http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=111414 |
yo,
ILLTALIC..you had an aiight flow and your structure was good. You had some good punches and personals. I liked your closer . You had good wordplay and creativity and consistency...Keep it up UNWRIITEN...You had a nice flow and an aiight structure. You has some punches but they didnt hit hard enough. No real personals. No wordplay..Keep at it though.. Vote ILLTALIC return da favour plz...http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=114476 |
I'm not one to be harsh with criticism. So I'll stay with helping.
Unwritten- You need to start thinking outside the box... Don't use concepts that are common because common concepts WILL be played. You have potential though. Re word your lines until they sound perfect and try to keep each line the same length. Work on your structure as well. Don't use //s "s *s or any other symbols. illtalic- Same with you.. think outside the box.. I see you were trying to get witty with a few concepts but they were all easy to think of and too common. They were all played. Your structure wasn't bad but you've been here long enough now and you need to break loose from these n00bs. Start reading elite battles and try to get in LLL after you elevate. Battling in Front Lines will not help you. My vote goes to illtalic because he had better concept ideas and harder punches. Both came weak and both came played but illtalics punches were harder. V/ illtalic |
^ Appreciate it Token.. ya rite there.. i prefer Elevated but votin takes too long.. but i'll stick at it cos i know iv gotta rise..
an im followin links. |
i guess illtalic got this one
thanks 4 the votes but ive been Keyin for 6 years, and im stuck doing //// " " " " " its my thing, its not newbish just how i write my flows. peace |
penis
Token Black guy |
At least I.C.U left wiv his head held high.. dumb fukk..
Thanx fa votin peeps.. -uppn- to finish this |
Yo Hazard.. sometimes ya jus gotta break wiv ya own traditions.. if puttin all those symbols at the end of ya lines is losin ya respect.. kus stop it!
Simplicity is the key.. forget bold, italic, different font, size etc.. jus make sure ya words are fire. |
aight illtalic got this for better punches and personals
ill-nice punches good peronals nice flow good structure nice openeing i liked the closer nice verse,very constant 8-10 unwritten-so so punches no good personals ok flow didnt like the structure opener was ok closer was aight dont bold ur shit,cap it or put those marks on ur punches 5-10 v/illtalic...for a better verse and punches |
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