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X ..Vs.. Flow Intelligent [!Topical!]
X ...Vs.... Flow intelligent
[Color=Dark Red] Topic:Life in Prison/Jail Verse due by tommar.... 20-30 lines Crew votes [/COlor] .: Check in:. |
Lol Sorry for the mess up....LOL things happen..But dont worry atleast ya still can read it
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ya aiight so wait is it ok for crew votes or not ok.. ?
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o ya checkin in ...we both rook's to this topical battle shyt so good luck fam
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yea its ok......Dats why I put it....I need mah crew to see how I think..If they dont like it then they can vote for you...but yea....Crew votes aloud..So let me get da typin
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Fine nah no crew votes....aight.....Now lets do dis..dis mah first time doing dis topical so we both new to it so lets do dis.....Tell me how I do LOL....Good luck
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I thought I was treated different for being a fellow black citizen Waiting patiently as the judge sentence me to 40 years in prison Finally arived and it took so long I thought we arrived so late Standing Naked and with jail clothes as I meet my room mate feeling like in mah insides ache as stress building up as a insect Miss treated so much Dont know how to compared my diolect But it seems like nobody ever listens to what I have to say Eating so ol ish like brochili,Beans, and Stew every single day Being someones Bitch nigga him mah plate and being in da way I have to give Lil Pistol Starter mah food on monday and friday Even though I got to eat 6 times week Its like im on a thrill ride Giving mah brain a bide...As I get heart soft in my deep inside Since I was the oldest one in da prison I thought I was dope Forgot about some rules, so I accidently dropped the Cheap soap Now im 54 years old trying to escape with a bare simple Glass I see how a girl feels, it didnt feel to well,as I got fucked up my ass Wrote letters to nobody but my self and My life is nothing but fall I watch everyone use the payphone but me..I had nobody to call Didnt have no sport listening to biggie smalls..As I play basketball Hearing calls from far away with a soft sweet voice wondering the halls Try to pray to the lord why it had to be me..choose please my decision Spirit Downlifted Colosion, Broke my eye site leavin me wit a torn vision The person I had to give my food to I think he was well Very fed Becuz hes 80 and now dead,As by bitch boy give me some head its 39 years and im 62 and me and my friends is finding a way to escape Got cought like alwayz, See where I was just on that Video Tape They sentence me to Death Feeling sad but I had to be saved Mah time is now up ,Leaving my spirit time totally shocked and delayed Its Now the time..they strap me up and pulled the curtain as I plea It hurt, but I couldnt see, But I was nowhere so I thought im finally free Dat took me a long time to come up..But dis is mah first topical but I came aight im my opinion |
well this is my 2nd topical so im still new at this here it is
25 years to life to live...i took this bid over the death penalty
walking into the block talking hard but im fucked up mentaly i let the gun get the best of me...inmates tryin to be friends with me but i really know what they want and it something sexually im in a cell 6 by 9 this is my home cuz ill be here the rest of my life turning toothbrushes into knifes talkin shit and gettin in fights on sundays we get chicken but that meat is really a pigeon i eat then crawl into a ball and start crying and flinching lying and bitching...had to make some bread so i worked in the kitchen tryin to be cool...while im poisoning food and fucking this dude and face the consequences when the guards make me get nude so they put me in the box...it was hot as hell and i was frying i noticed i was surrounded by darkness as i started getting frightened 6 weeks later im out sweat got me drenched and soaked walked into cell block C and got beaten and choked from the night to afternoon the crazyiness grew i knew i was doomed and this prison was my tomb got transfered to solitary confinment for slashin a bitch had to sleep on cold metal with rats attackin my hips this was it...the final straw..so i started planning my escape heart filled with hate...the time was now no need to proscrastinate my plan was to attack the guard in the kitchen when i was cleaning the dishes i was drying the knife when he walked near me and i stabbed him relentless grabbed the keys then ran to the door...opened the lock and grabbed the .44 this plan had to go off without a hitch or my legacy would be no more i opened all the gates kept at a silent pace till i reached the wardens office and to find out he was standing there with his pants off and topless i quickly drew the gun and thoughts debated if i should shoot him i decided he would be my hostage to get outta here and i could use him i grabbed him by the throat tied his hands with rope and moved to the door i was greeted by a bullet and watched as my blood littered the floor ~!1!~ |
First off ima say just b/c me and ~R~ Center our Verses doesnt meen all topicals have to be that way.
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on another site i was on i centered all ym battles no matter what they were and i figured a topical would look better centered i dont know why but when i looked at it before i centered it...it didnt look str8
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Lol ok heres my vote....
Nvm The kids in my crew. |
Quote:
HAHAHHA LMFAOOO sorry for freeposting..i cant vote cause me n flow same crews..but that shit is funny |
Lol..Yea dat is funny LOL..But uppin this thanks though uppin this..
I finally did something good in my life.. |
dang dis was a good topic i think it goes to x doe he made it feel like he was dere yo kno wat im sayin it felt real his sounded so much betta both was good but my vote goes to
X |
lil nae if your gonna vote either poll it or know what the fuck your talking about.. i aint callin it a d/r or anything but i was hoping for more feedback to elevate on topicals not just he made it seem like he was there get serious or stay outta this thread
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Uppin this....Flow intelligent is right....Yall must got long term memory lost
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Alright here it is...
X, You are definantly more of a topical person then a battle person. You made it feel more realistic and more like you were right there. It sounded more like what a person would think... except for hte raping in the ass part, that was just humor lmao... Flow, Wasn't really that bad. And i dont really have anything to say to help you. You are pretty decent at topicals but X made it a little better then yours. Don't get me wrong, you had a nice topical... You just needed a little more detail and maybe some more thought into it. V/X |
uppin dis...We needn votes in here
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uppin
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uppin lets go peeps vote please
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Uppin
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Ok...keep this dead real....
This was a tight battle while reading both of these rhymes i was feelign them strong!...i was feeling x rhyme alot it was very strong in the way he was tryin to tell people the way he was feeling....Flow i was feeling ur more because....it actully showed like you had exper in the pen and.u was speakin some real shit...ya was talking 24/7 real life shit in jail....x im not sure if u ever exp it but once u do u will be writing diffrent......flow was talking on some other type shit like....that all he hssd to live for type shit.....x was flowing like.......well fuck all this let express the way i feel.....nice shit both of ya Vote-Flow |
lol aight...No hate
But im still going to win n e wayz....J/K But flow intelligent thought I won and Lot did Lol...But O well Thanks...Killacam for votin...Atleast it wont get slept on |
close topical...
these some new cats to tha game, but RATED came with some great insight... creativity was reality, came with nice punchlines... he was consistant with his punches too, came overall pretty good.....7.9/10 i have to say that FLOW had more creativity, he came with more insight like hed been there before ?? but nice flow to tha whole verse, but you lacked in punches they were good, but they werent consistant, nice topical....7.7/10 vote : rated |
uppin for votes will return the favor ~!1!~
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dam will someone fucking vote on this it has been open a while now and only 2 people have voted...uppin for votes will return the favor ~!1!~
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Yes Please uppin and I will return the favor
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i dont like votin on topicals but here we go.
Meta- Damn.....imagery was nice dogg....your topical made it seem a lot more real and shit...flow was good..wordplay was nice....vocab help it.just a nice drop not much more i can say except for that rape shit was kinda funny Flow Intel- for your 2nd topical not bad playa....i just think you need to put a little more thought...kinda paint a picture...imagery was good..wordplay too again overall another nice drop..i think that meta made me feel like i was there vote-Meta |
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