.::Re$tricted Vs. DeadlyVision::.(Topical)
 

Hahaha..........its about time R...........topical...........yup.

Checkity Check.

Reminisce on the deceased, wondering about having peace..
Lost lives on the streets, motionless bodies on concrete..
From my first breath all my steps were already planned and known..
On this Earth I am not free to roam but confined within extremist zones..
What do you do when someone has a gun, best move is to run..
Don't defend, you'll be a lost son, we don't want to lose another one..
Brings to mind Big, Pac and Biggie, all of a sudden the fun is done..
But now our lives turned glummy, after hearing news of a fallen buddy..
It's so hard to suceed in survival, almost impossible to turn a smile..
Only the fittest survive! every ssecond of life is worth a while..
It hurts a whole damn lot, nobody helps including the cops..
This needs to stop, depressing witnessing another brother drop..
I Guess all of these crimes is stressing, terribly depressing..
Jfk Shooting, Nobody confessing, either way they were messing..
This pain needs to end quick, this shit is beginning to make me sick..
It's just un-believable like a flick, anybody can solve the trick..
You Know what is worse, that we all came from mother earth..
It seems like we were cursed, to seeing murders since birth..
What is all this worth?, just a struggle, hard to remain humble...
Our lives are ready to crumble, starting to tumble in this trouble..
Eventually I am not afraid to be freed from this evil existence..
Death doesn’t scare me, cuz paradise awaits in the distance..
So we only have memories today, of people who paved the way..
People like our close ones I'd say, only move left is to pray..

not bad dawg, ain't really into text.. 'cause i got no clue if it flows.. but shit was worded nicely.. good shit..

Thanks its my 1st Topical .................thanks for showin some love homey.


We need poll voters. Holla.

Upping For Votes...

Nice Drop Deadly..

~R~

Booya.

It's so hard to suceed in survival, almost impossible to turn a smile..
Only the fittest survive! every ssecond of life is worth a while..

^^ technically i can't explain why i like this, but damn it really provoked a though for me, which was quite rare from both writers. this sort of concept doesn't really brush with me, since 95% of writers write to it, its hard to create new angles and aspects to it. but...

Restricted- your rhyme scheme was as basic as they come, you had one word rhymes at the end of the bars and that was it; very dissapointing. you had no technically advance in your lines. your writers was quite strong though, but i wasn't really feeling your piece.

Deadly- your rhyme scheme was more complex than restricted, i know you can make it alot more complex, but even judging it on this performance it emphasized restricted lack of scheming on rhymes. poetic techniques were prominent in here; with some similies etc. nothing to to special in this area ot be honest, but nonetheless showed restricted up. your emotion that i sensed in this was what amazed me to be honest; being personal and the way you expressed that from your writers voice was brilliant! I cant' see any aspect of this battle that you didn't excede restricted in.

V/Deadlyvision

Restricted
I Strive For The Worlds Acceptance But Get Declined..
I Struggle To Survive In Life, Collect Every Nickle and Dime..
I Ask For Perservance and The Assistance Of Higher Class..
But It's Like Swallowing Glass To Stay In Middle Class..
Once A Teenage Dream, Football Star, HighsMen Trophy..
But Credit Cards, No College, The Debt Is Choking Me..
No Future It Seems For My Non-Educated Lazy Ass..
I Dipict Loyality To Those Who Have The Needs To Last..
like the swallowin glass...nice metiphore,good portray of struggle so far..
I Fight For Food, Shelter, and The Torn Clothes On My Back..
I Don't Know Why I Live, For My Dreams Seem To Be Off Track..
My Reality Can't Be Real, These Demons Have To Be Fiction..
They Curse Me, I Do What I Must To Stay Warm, Create Friction..
Rub My Hands Together To Keep My Low-Blood Circulating..
Why The Fuck You Hating? Can't You See I'm Trying To Make It..
Low Standards? Who You Think You Are To Make Those Judgements..
I Live The Same Way You Do Just Diffrent Concepts Of Budgets..
I May Creep Threw The Streets In A Mis-Draught Form..But..
We Were All Brought Into This World From The Womb Being Born..
I like 'd the concept's budget's bar, got a lil carried away wit the blood ciculatin tho...not science class bro...
You Believe In Your Heart That Your Suit Makes You Better?..
You Cold-Hearted Bastard..I Don't Need Charity Fuck Ya Chedda..
I May Be At The Bottom of Bottoms and I Can't Sink Any Further..
Just Maybe I Can Suceed If I Take My Brain and Heart and Merge'm..
Nice closing bars.....left on a up'note wit good multi's......

Overall- I like'd it, You started strong an finished strong. A lil shaky in the middle but overall it wasnt a bad topical.....stayed on topic...nice

Deadly
Reminisce on the deceased, wondering about having peace..
Lost lives on the streets, motionless bodies on concrete..
From my first breath all my steps were already planned and known..
On this Earth I am not free to roam but confined within extremist zones..
What do you do when someone has a gun, best move is to run..
Don't defend, you'll be a lost son, we don't want to lose another one..
Brings to mind Big, Pac and Biggie, all of a sudden the fun is done..
lil off topic....your struggle's turned into Biggie-n-2Pac's
But now our lives turned glummy, after hearing news of a fallen buddy..
It's so hard to suceed in survival, almost impossible to turn a smile..
Only the fittest survive! every ssecond of life is worth a while..
It hurts a whole damn lot, nobody helps including the cops..
This needs to stop, depressing witnessing another brother drop..
I like this last line..the other's flwo kinda threw me off, the multi's an all
I Guess all of these crimes is stressing, terribly depressing..
Jfk Shooting, Nobody confessing, either way they were messing..
This pain needs to end quick, this shit is beginning to make me sick..
It's just un-believable like a flick, anybody can solve the trick..
You Know what is worse, that we all came from mother earth..
It seems like we were cursed, to seeing murders since birth..
why u talkin bout JFK?chill wit the multi's
What is all this worth?, just a struggle, hard to remain humble...
Our lives are ready to crumble, starting to tumble in this trouble..
Eventually I am not afraid to be freed from this evil existence..
Death doesn’t scare me, cuz paradise awaits in the distance..
So we only have memories today, of people who paved the way..
People like our close ones I'd say, only move left is to pray..
Good closing...the multi's were alot better here. More flow. Nice close

Overall I'd say a tad sub-par. You had a few good moments, but alot was off topic an your multi's hurt your flo. Ok verse, nothing special tho....

VOTE- Restricted

ok dis was a nice battle both on topic deadly i like the intro and da splits so it was nice re$tricted nice hammy dowmn drop feelin it both emcess had it goin nicely

R-

start-I Strive For The Worlds Acceptance But Get Declined..
I Struggle To Survive In Life, Collect Every Nickle and Dime..

nicely done 9.4/10

deadly

start-This topical is about my life & how it resambles to game of dice, I am not chasing I am Pacing to reach my destination away from face of death we just guests trying to Defend the meaning of our lives the quality of our lives that’s what matters not cash nor ice it’s the price we pay for our sins till the life line ends.

nice^^^ lol long but nice 9.7/10

R

bestline-Once A Teenage Dream, Football Star, HighsMen Trophy..
But Credit Cards, No College, The Debt Is Choking Me..

dat shit was tite
10/10

deadly

I Guess all of these crimes is stressing, terribly depressing..
Jfk Shooting, Nobody confessing, either way they were messing..

nice vocab 9.5/10

helped up verse

R-
Low Standards? Who You Think You Are To Make Those Judgements..
I Live The Same Way You Do Just Diffrent Concepts Of Budgets..

made a impact helped yo verse stand out 9.6/10

deadly-This pain needs to end quick, this shit is beginning to make me sick..
It's just un-believable like a flick, anybody can solve the trick..


^^ nice 9.4/10 also yo vocab stood out

closer

R_
I May Be At The Bottom of Bottoms and I Can't Sink Any Further..
Just Maybe I Can Suceed If I Take My Brain and Heart and Merge'm..
9.6/10 swrap up nicely

deadly

So we only have memories today, of people who paved the way..
People like our close ones I'd say, only move left is to pray..

vocab slipped but nice 9.6/10

overall

flow-R
vocab-deadly
structure-both
multis-both
meta-both
consitant-R
beginning-Deadly
closer-R
winner-R

2 fam votes?^^

Is that allowed?

Restricted - good drop...flow was decent...choppy in spots but worked...vocab def was strong part of your verse....good concepts...i liked this bar alot...
Low Standards? Who You Think You Are To Make Those Judgements..
I Live The Same Way You Do Just Diffrent Concepts Of Budgets..
complex concept of your spit and stayed on topic in a basic yet creative way....good drop...give it a 8.9/10...

DV - nice drop for ur first ever topical...very nice flow...topped R's....he got you on the vocab....but u still had a nice concept....u had a good history background brought into yours which was crative...bit of a storyline which made it nice...both of yall had nice drops....

Well both drops were nice...but complexity went to dv...he had more creative concepts....and he took it with all the shit he had in there...surprised me....good drops...Vote - DV....

Yo Kid They Ain't Family Votes...Ain't In MT....

Plus LI's Won't Count Due To Beef LI and Myself Have With Each Other...I Have The Convos If You'd Like To See Them

~R~

But u voted on Genie Vs L.I. isnt he allowed to have his own Oppinion. And If L.I's dont count Pro was in yo crew MT actually u recruited em..lol Carson is an audio cat. Also in MT so what does that make?

lol

Well I"m Not In MT....I Don't Know What You Getting At Kid...

I AM NOT IN METAPHORICAL TECHNIQUES...

CARSONJET IS NOT IN METAPHORICAL TECHNIQUES...

LI's Can Count...It's Beef But W/e...If That's What It Boils Down To Then Its Straight...

~R~

R stop bitching...i vote honest....and you no that....u voted in my battle with genie....u told me that i merked him but once u left the crew i lost?...hmm i aint gonna complain...i dont give a fuck....just shut up and take the vote cuz it was honest...anyways....upping this for you guys....

excellent verse by both restricted came with an approach based on social class and money that was real dope thats a surivial in itself the surival of money but i felt deadly were deadly vision went with the verse more.. i feel like his verse dealt with the ultimate survivial and he hit it on the head better his verse i felt flowed better line after line merged together well


i felt like these lines here were nicely done

"From my first breath all my steps were already planned and known..
On this Earth I am not free to roam but confined within extremist zones..
What do you do when someone has a gun, best move is to run..
Don't defend, you'll be a lost son, we don't want to lose another one..
Brings to mind Big, Pac and Biggie, all of a sudden the fun is done..
But now our lives turned glummy, after hearing news of a fallen buddy..
It's so hard to suceed in survival, almost impossible to turn a smile..
Only the fittest survive! every ssecond of life is worth a while.. "

deadlies verse was more poetic to me , restricteds was nice but i felt like he could have came better with the subject he took up

vote- deadly

audio cat....

im like 175-60 in text....
3-2 in audio.................

nevermind the fact I'll rip u in Text-Topic-n-Audio.

I'm not in MT. hence..."solo"pc-1

Restricted: Once again you dropped some nice shit, an overall tight verse. U stayed true to the topic all the way through as usual, i do think that ure rhyme scheme was a little too basic cuz u have done a lot better in the past. ure flow was tight, it all went well together from start to finish and there was a lot of thought into it clearly. i do think u cud have done better and the rhyme scheme was about the only thing that needed work.

DV: for ure first topical u dropped some hot shit. ure verse flowed great, a little better than restricted mainly cuz ure lines weren't as stretched. u stayed on the topic all the way through to which is gud. ure rhyme scheme like restricted's was pretty basic but i thought u edged it just slightly. i think that if restricted would have thought more about it and done a better rhyme scheme like he can he wud have beat u. but u got him this time with an overall better flowing verse and slightly more complex rhyme scheme.

V/ - DV

The Ryhmes and Flow...LOL...

Did You Think About The Content In The Actual Verse?

~R~

Re$tricted'z Drop

I Strive For The Worlds Acceptance But Get Declined..
I Struggle To Survive In Life, Collect Every Nickle and Dime..
NICE OPENER BIG UP! 8/10
I Ask For Perservance and The Assistance Of Higher Class..
But It's Like Swallowing Glass To Stay In Middle Class..
WHOA NICE ONE IT WAS STRAIGHT 8.5/10
Once A Teenage Dream, Football Star, HighsMen Trophy..
But Credit Cards, No College, The Debt Is Choking Me..
NICE FELT THE EMOTION COMING THROUGH IT 9/10
No Future It Seems For My Non-Educated Lazy Ass..
I Dipict Loyality To Those Who Have The Needs To Last..
IT WAS GOOD BUT NOT AS GOOD AS THE FIRST 2 BARS 8/10
I Fight For Food, Shelter, and The Torn Clothes On My Back..
I Don't Know Why I Live, For My Dreams Seem To Be Off Track..
WOW THIS IMPRESSED ME EVEN MORE HEARTFILLED 8.5/10
My Reality Can't Be Real, These Demons Have To Be Fiction..
They Curse Me, I Do What I Must To Stay Warm, Create Friction..
NICE LIKE THE AS REST 8/10
Rub My Hands Together To Keep My Low-Blood Circulating..
Why The Fuck You Hating? Can't You See I'm Trying To Make It..
FEELING YOU ON THIS HAPPENS TO MOST OF US 10/10
Low Standards? Who You Think You Are To Make Those Judgements..
I Live The Same Way You Do Just Diffrent Concepts Of Budgets..
AIGHT GOOD ON LOVING THIS 8.5/10
I May Creep Threw The Streets In A Mis-Draught Form..But..
We Were All Brought Into This World From The Womb Being Born..
UNDERSTAND THIS PERFECTLY.....9/10
You Believe In Your Heart That Your Suit Makes You Better?..
You Cold-Hearted Bastard..I Don't Need Charity Fuck Ya Chedda..
YEP WE CAN MAKE IT NO MATTER WHAT NEED NOT NO ONE 10/10
I May Be At The Bottom of Bottoms and I Can't Sink Any Further..
Just Maybe I Can Suceed If I Take My Brain and Heart and Merge'm..
^^^^NICE CLOSER TO END A GREAT DROP 8/10

8.6/10


DeadlyVisions


Reminisce on the deceased, wondering about having peace..
Lost lives on the streets, motionless bodies on concrete..
NICE OPENER REALLY FEELING IT 8,5/10
From my first breath all my steps were already planned and known..
On this Earth I am not free to roam but confined within extremist zones..
STR8 BAR HOMIE FEELING IT 8.5/10
What do you do when someone has a gun, best move is to run..
Don't defend, you'll be a lost son, we don't want to lose another one..
I DISAGREE WITH THE BAR DEFEND IF YOU DIE THAN THATS IT WE ALL DIE ONE DAY 7.5/10
Brings to mind Big, Pac and Biggie, all of a sudden the fun is done..
But now our lives turned glummy, after hearing news of a fallen buddy..
YEP I WOULD BE WEEPING IF ONE OF MY HOMIEZ DIE 10/10
It's so hard to suceed in survival, almost impossible to turn a smile..
Only the fittest survive! every ssecond of life is worth a while..
WORD I AGREE 9/10
It hurts a whole damn lot, nobody helps including the cops..
This needs to stop, depressing witnessing another brother drop..
UMM....NOTHING DIFFERENT OR CREATIVE HERE SORRY 7.5/10
I Guess all of these crimes is stressing, terribly depressing..
Jfk Shooting, Nobody confessing, either way they were messing..
NICE BAR FEELING IT A LOT 9.5/10
This pain needs to end quick, this shit is beginning to make me sick..
It's just un-believable like a flick, anybody can solve the trick..
UMMM OK NOT UNDERSTANDING THIS ONE WELL.....8/10
You Know what is worse, that we all came from mother earth..
It seems like we were cursed, to seeing murders since birth..
NICE NICE NICE ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!10/10
What is all this worth?, just a struggle, hard to remain humble...
Our lives are ready to crumble, starting to tumble in this trouble..
NICE AGAIN BUT NOT AS GOOD AS THE LAST 8/10
Eventually I am not afraid to be freed from this evil existence..
Death doesn’t scare me, cuz paradise awaits in the distance..
ITS OK BUT YOU SAID TO RUN NOT DEFEND ON ANOTHER BAR SO IT SCREWS IT UP FOR ME BECAUSE IT MEANT SAVE YOURSELF AND NOW YOU SAY DEATH DON'T SCARE ME BLAH! 7/10
So we only have memories today, of people who paved the way..
People like our close ones I'd say, only move left is to pray..
NICE CLOSER FEELING IT A LOT 8.5/10

wow I averaged what I gave you and you got a 8.5/10

REALLY REALLY CLOSE BATTLE SERIOUSLY KEEP DROPPING

v/Re$stricted

do a honest vote on my battle with PLOTT links in signature...

^^This guy neva used to drop a vote in efl..lol suddently now he does.

Anywayz


up hoes.

aight im gonna have to give this to DV

DV: you was just more better it was fun reading on you grabbed my attention and it made me want to keep reading ..your flow didnt get boring to read and it was hot.....your ending was killayou could have used a lil mo met4s and and things in that nature but good topical...good for your first topical i cant wait to read another topicasl battle by you.....all in all 8/10

R.: you was also good just not good enuf..you had my attention for awhile then i got a lil bored and wasnt really interested in it any more kinda boring could have used some questions so that i coudl stay into it and want to read in to more but goood drop it flowed pretty good....nive vocab also...all in all 7/10

vote=DV

aye yo ive been blacklisted....sorry cant vote.......................

lol ahh man thats crazy............................................. .