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Don |||vrs||| ShAdOw (topical)
20 lines minimum
Topic- ur in a life or death situation-what do you do... ill spit first ill spit tonight i expect u to spit tonight no crew votes no hate votes no d/r votes good luck check in before you spit spit is due at midnight |
checkin in.. i will spit tonight.. u do the same don
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aight here it goes, i speed down the highway heading for the bridge- as i hear a noise i look over the side of the ridge- i look up ohh shit! theres a car speeding my way- im caught shocked, with nothing to even say- he was coming at me and i was blinded by his lights- so by instict alone i start to swerve to tha right- oh fuck! now im going straight for the edge- and then has my car hitz-im dangeling of the ledge- i dont know what to do but i dont wana plunder- i dont wanna free-fall cuz ill end up 6 feet under- almost without thought i take my seatbelt off- the car was dangeling so i had to move soft- i was confused, saying do i belong in dis world- then i thought i have to stay...for my baby gurl- maybe it was to late, i had no time to stall- my car tips and i begin to fastly fall- i hit the water and my car makes a big splash- then i realize im loosing air and pretty fast- the door wont open the window wont break- now im really thinking its too late- finally the door opens and water poors in- i remember feeling the cold water on my skin- evrything went by fast.. i still remember the sound- now i gotta start swimming to the top or ill drown- im far down i might not reach the surface- what should i do why is god trying to hurt us?- im deeply confused as im left in a blunder- i start to feel weak.. as i fall back under- i reached the top and i start to really swim- i looked up as i hear the voice of a fisherman- he pulled me up to wear i thought i wuz safe- he hit a huge rock and now his boat is in bad shape- i fall in no more energy for another fight- i soon realized....... thats how i would end my life- |
aight i jus got on ill spit by midnight it my little nephews birthday ill be bak around 8 aight chekin in pc
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The flashes of lights luminating the shadows...
in my left hand i hold the chance of me facin the gallows... a colt 45. and my decison hasnt been made... like a pathocidal criminal gainin attention in hopes of bein laid... these pigs begin to line against the buildings exterior... and the shouts from the negotiator...inferin that im inferior... i have a fork in the road...travel two different highways... should i shoot the hostage...but this choice denies me of my days... i can feel the lasers...tracin my tinted figure of head... should i murder this hostage...before the realease ill be dead... killed by the casing from a snipers indented chamber... people now watch me after their long day of labor... and i had to be here cause i never worked a day in my life... my father always said that attitude would lead to my strife... easy to say for a rich man livin behind the lies he created... my decision has begun...somewhere in heaven my candles been faded... well goodbye to my family and all those who have cared... i brace for this kill...even the newscaster cant deny hes scared... pull the trigger...thats it its all over... the police calls announced on all of their rovers... now the pd's rep has become all of it taint... cause as they rushed to the hostage...one shot to the head was covered in paint ^^if u jus didnt get it it was a paintball gun and he died tryin to prove a point |
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hott battle here uppin dis shit
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Shadow- nice drop man....you didnt use great vocab but your story was tight
i could picture that shit in my head.....which is why you did good with imagery i was feelin that story dogg..had me in to it all the way...that ending was tight nice drop Don- good drop dogg...never really seen you in a topical but you did ok i wasnt feelin your story as much as shadows but i think you used better vocab but shadow took imagery and i felt his story a lot more vote-shadow |
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uppin lets go vote................................
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yea for real up dis shit....................
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Both of you had pretty decent spits. Shadow had better imagery in his topical and more of a storyline that built up to a climax. Don your spit was also decent, your vocabulary was tight, just needed a little more to the story, work on your imagery. The story itself was good, just needed more to it, make us feel what this guy is going thru up until the point he shoots himself.
V-Shadow Drop an honest vote on this battle when you get a chance. http://community.rapbattles.com/showthread.php?t=130662 |
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uppin i need this battle to get voted on cause i got a full lineup i cant open any new battles so vote ill return the favor aight pc
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Shadow...good drop very clear, vocab was basic but the story was soo hot that the vocab didn't even matter, I liked your rhyme scheme an how you followed the story throughout, the imagery was tight an it made your topical come to life it was believable, it was like a written movie almost, good shit......8/10
Don...yours was good too, story wasn't quite as clear viocab was good though, rhyme scheme was solid but imagery wasn't as strong as it could have been, it flowed good though, but the story itself could have been stronger so even though I liked it, I don't think it was strong enough to win this one, son.....7/10 Vote: Shadow |
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uppin to get this thing closed....................
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