An untitled Scripture
 

story about the man who was influenced by music and let it affect his life.....

He was on his samsung, iced out, listenin to rap songs
Tried to find himself but he was lookin at the map wrong/
Clapped on - gangsta - wanted to emulate the code
Stimulated woes, lead blindly thru simulated roads/
Integrated foes into his life, hes always shakin hands
Makin plans to be the biggest hustler thru forsaken lands/
Breakin grands, smokin and drinkin that henny ish
Down for change - but tryin to make more than 50 cent/
Many wish death upon em, froze wrists in his cold whips
Grindin with heat on the streets, stayed pushin those Clipse/
Oh shyt, he shootin? - hed diss idols - rip titles
His Lil Flip in attitude spoke a gameover for his rivals/
Which bible did he live by?, smoked meadows of cannabis
Street dreams to be a mob boss - status - ghetto and Fabulous/
Money and power fueled him, the danger got em shot up
Recovered and became Akon once he was locked up/
Discovered wisdom, no letters, hard labor, the food - ill
Became an artist that drew houses, drew trees, Dru Hills/
Accepted Christ, used to be the young cat makin the guns clap
Opened his eyes, stopped smoking Mary J, hes on a comeback/
Been there done that, dreamed hobbies of writin lyrical
Fightin spiritual, rhymed to the point he was citing mircles/
Spittin verbs and metaphorical phrases - his writtens burn
His soul star’d appeareances with Musiq - lyrically christened - nerd/
Kickin words thats Beyonce - Know les? - not with his destined knee
Whether happy or stressed, believed his liquid flow would bless the seas/
Finally, yes - released, proceeded to face rappers, calm but tensed
The resurrection of hip hop, thus started with his Common Sense/
This tree grows, now The Roots of devine lyrics and he knows
Soul machine, envisioned high hopes, no longer would Cee-Lo/
Once trapped as state property, esacped to freedom via Freeway
Soon he would x men with mental powers like a Jean Grae/
Peeps feelin em too, perfection forged from rap, rhythm and blues
Mission to lose? - nah - his legacy will shine cuz his glisten is new/
Feedin knowledge to the famished, these kids with a boney glow
Is it possible that he can end the K-os? - heaven only knows/
The ghost left his corrupted soul - reborn - takin his own steps
Is he the new danger to rap? - he replied…… Mos Def/

and always thank you for reading....

uppin for some feedback

ALL i gots to say welcome back and dope story script.




Nice multi'z, upp ya vocab a little. Flow was alright. Expressing it was good. The creativty of it, was good. I could picture that in my mind.

NICE DOPE STORY. 9/10

1

back? i never left something...
but thanks for actualy posting FB
and thank you for reading

uppin for feed back

somebody post something and dont just look at it

dope !!

the topic is nice, multi's are dope. flow is good. I personnaly dont feel the way you used mainstream name's in it. that's not my style, but it's obviously your's and you used the name's to perfection.

good drop.

link's?

nice drop, i tried to flow it to some luda beats but it aint work lol
give it 9 out of ten

this wasnt one of the best oms

but it was decent,the imagery was vivid,the emotion was ok,you expressed the events nicely,and the structure was ok besides the /*s u dont need those so take them out next time,the vocab was good,and the word use was blah coulda done a little better,the concept was good...not played at all....overall this was a decent but yet good peace.......keep em coming


7.5/10

this some nice stuff....
your flow was real nice the whole way through, good job throwin some nice multis in there as well...
i think you went a lil bit overboard on usin the names of other rappers in it though, oh well, not too big of a deal...
real nice work here man...i was definetly feelin the topic too....
9/10

damn... this was pretty tight u werent lyin...... some people dont get it.... the name callin isnt necesarily his "style" its representive of how much he loves music and lives his life through music..... gettin so entranced by the music scene that he relates every even in his life to a song, because it is his life..... and shows how he takes the music so seriously and deeply that he is influenced by the words in the songs, and acts on this, even tho its not always the best thing like with the canibus/fabulous line (and like 50 cent and lil Flip mentions)..... ur closer was pretty good too i think........

i know u might be pissed that most people may not make that connection as i see above,, but i fopund it extremely dope and it is the best drop ive seen this month (and i mean in the past 30 days)

i also love how he seems reckless... maybe listenin to the wrong music or choosin the wrong role models and than he has the turn around here:

Discovered wisdom, no letters, hard labor, the food - ill
Became an artist that drew houses, drew trees, Dru Hills/

and than follows up later with the transformation... or i think.... i might even be wrong.... here:

Finally, yes - released, proceeded to face rappers, calm but tensed
The resurrection of hip hop, thus started with his Common Sense/

but anyways....... i thought this was one of the dopest OMs in a while

my first 10/10 even tho it pains me to ever give a 10 to anyone..... u tell me if i got anythin wrong by the way, but thats wat i thought

I think it was a str8 story had hell of good verses but not allot but keep elevating off of that so str8 all over.

9.7/10

Thanks for all the feedback i really apreciate it...



you got what i was trying to represent. And the bar:

Finally, yes - released, proceeded to face rappers, calm but tensed
The resurrection of hip hop, thus started with his Common Sense/

This is how he transformed into a beter emcce

ok i'll pm you with an Idea i have...uppin for feedback

not bad shit bro. definately sense some wu-tang inspired lyric style. the way u use multis and language reminds me of wu-tang a bit. nice topic u used but i think u could have delivered it better. i didnt really get a message out of this. you should try to get a message across with everything u write not just use words that rhyme to set a scene but yeh you did good here.
7.5/10

dope open mic...practically everything was on point and wouldnt mind voting this as open mic of january unless somethin better comes along but this was fire...

the message brought out was excellent and good concept, the flow was practically great in all of it except near the end it got a little bit off but theres no reason to bs about that practically the rest was great the vocab was on point it didnt fuck up nothin else it was delivered in all the right times basically everything was good here give it a 10/10 keep doin ya thing

peace

its talent, good shit, rely on god spy of the eye, u got alpahbet written all over ur teeth, nice open mic maybe u'll see my shit someday late keep it certified, gansta

ya im gonna make january mine....check me out every week with an even sicker opem mic every week...

hey man u were right it's of the best man u got good structure and rhyming and everthing else hey i'd love it if u return the favor man

dat drop was dope, i liked it, wordplay dats wut i look fo wordplay nice wordplay it flowd good 2 i'd ratd dat 8.5,9/10

good read i liked it man word

tahnks for all the feed back....

upping for feedback...

weerd this was a good read mic was feelin it you should drop alot more glad to see you bak an droppin fam 8.5/10 easy.....=1=

oh an hit up my last OM verbal holocoust(The lost keystyles) weerdness........=1=

ys this whole page fuckd up/????????????

Sex impressive need an excessive amount “come here girl”
Spend time when I incline in bed kiss a girl call her pearl
Kisses cause me to crush can’t pause this free rush of a climax
Bend my knees and stoop to the juicy coo-chee soup, then relax