Need Feedback, Fuck A Win..
 

aight this me and Cali battle, y'all seen cali's verse cuz i couldn't make it back home to post a verse so he automatically got 5-0.. but here's my verse also.. and FUCK all y'all who said i'm the worse female on this bitch.. but anywayz, leave feedback.. fa real no b/s on who y'all think won. leave a critique cuz i'm goin fa makin at least semi-finals in the next Royalty Tourney.. so Socrates leave feedback also.. :thumbup:

CALI
Im wack? so why you went and tryed to recruit me?(link 1)
Now i gotta feel bad cuz i usually dont beat on my groupies(link 2)
Willa on vocation we needed a new slut guess who we chose?
What you thought it was skill?when ya audios like frozen rivers
...........NO FLOW!!
Yous a killa?....i agree how many horses died for ya hairstyle?
You got the same chance winning that rappers have...
....... at getting fair trails!!
You not nice you just got more dickriders then most porn sets
Made a thread you was (leaving 2 months ago..........)
....what the fuck you aint gone yet?!
You won once..........not with a single explained vote either
Think you still mad we kicked you outta A.I...
.......and you was the co-leader!!
'Lady' spits 'Fiya'?Nope! her flame is out watch as i relight her
Cuz this bitch only has one chance of winning...
....... if she hires a ghostwriter!!


~Lady Fiya~
U dragrace hygiene cuz u iron jeans in driveways, Q’s dame?
Not being profane, u got “D” fault wins 2 like ur user name…
…your parked riders in reverse to start and end on E*
He beefs wit Jury cuz Flow ONLY made you a-ttorney!
He can’t make it nowhere, so he changed his name to CALI
Pump orgasms in your arteries, give E the heart to beat me
Flattened Saucony’s, who goes to prison for stabbing “things”?!
He plays for Crème, look how early you put out the Black Queen!
I don’t mean Chess, post all over the board can’t find recess-
Shun, my crew’s for elevation, don’t think you need-less!
Stick lyrics to monorails, cuz not once you held solo tracks
So fuckin wack, S e n s e r spit too, ONLY u got bad feedback!
U won respect as an artist?! Can’t even throw a hard hit..
With a name this bitch stole from commercials for carpet!**


*his name starts and end on E.. (empire)
**carpet site--http://www.empirecarpet.com/commercials/


AIGHT NOW LEAVE FEED, i need to know what i need to work on peeps.. :thumbup:

uppin kiddos............................................ ........

You have creative punches an metas, but in some places you word them wrong....

so i say you need ta work on the wordplay an structure side of things, but the punches an metas are certainly there, prolly the last person you wanted ta hear this from, but if you post in the LL Forum, then i'ma holla back, but you just need ta work on what i said, but thats just my opinnon

^^much appreciated... :thumbup:

OMG YOU USED THAT EMPIRE CARPET SHIT!!!!!!!!!! LMFAOLMFAOLMFAO....... u ARE the QUEEN for that one....... LOLOLOLOLOLOL, y didnt i think of that?!?1

^^i take that as you like...? but uhm, yea most people never heard of the empire commercial, they play it all the time in chicago..

CALI would have won that battle anyway, he came real nice there.

Fiya, your punches were'nt really that hard hitting, like, in the bars, it seemed to be a lot of filler, cos your set up lines were kind of random, and the opener just didnt fit together at all.

I guess jsut work on using punches better in your text.

i know, thats y most people wont get it but that shit is funny as hell.... i never laughed so hard in my life..... too bad only a few of us will get it.... juss thinkin about empy with that Old Carpet guy is crackin me up right now!

Too be honest, Empires verse was a little basic an boring, Empire is a nice emcee, i aint gonna deny that, but he's way too basic at times, he can just word his text together real good....

Yo ma just uppin ya wordplay a little that all

I read both battles closely, an if i was gonna vote

it'd go like.........


Empires verse:
Dope wordplay, an connected his punches an the build up too the punches real good, but his creativity wasnt that nice at all....

like the frozen river line, i wasnt feeling that stuff, but i prefer humour in rhymes, an empire usually dosent bring humour, but his wordplay was nice as hell...
wasnt feeling his closer neither, it just wasnt creative or witty, he seems too lack wit an humour, there his main faults...

Fiya:
Ya flow was choppy, but your certainly more creative in your pounches, but the flow was just too choppy, an it ruined your punches, an the build up too some of your personals seemed forced, its like u just wanted people ta take note of the punches an forget the build ups are even there, ya feel me?

For creativity Fiya gets it, an on the humour an wit side of things, she gets it too, but because her structure an wordplay was choppy an lacked flow when your reading it, the humour an wit are pointless, you feel me girl?

Empire gets the win but only becuse his verse flowed, he had punches an a few okay personals, but his shit was much more easy too read, so i'd have ta say empire

i ain't tryna disagree on feedback or whateva but not one of those lines are considered filler if i directed that shit towards him.. ALL oF THEM were pretty much personals and punches i threw metas time to time, but fillers? i got rid of those thing-a-mu-bobbers.. so yea, but thanx on the feed peeps.. i'm loving the honesty and Fuxjustaword it's all good.. lmao that had me laughin just watchin the video i was in tears when i first found the commercial on the net, i woulda never thought it would be a site for it.. lmao hee hee

Dont woory bout the comments post more pics

Maybe Filler wasnt the correct word, but read the first bar again.

None of that goes together, there's like 3/4 seperate things, its too packed. Which makes it seem like filler.

ayo girl only thing i saw messy was yer structure i found it kinda hard to follow but it wasnt as bad as empires soo other than that good verse ayo chekk out tha song i did fer my boi in poetic scriptures yall post me sum feedbakk thanx yall good job again ma

lol i wouldve won that even without the no show my verse is just harder period but we can set a battle wit those exact verses and i gurantee youll lose fiya no hate but im better then you only my hater said you won and even my enemys saying i beat you im better then you fiya no hate just being real

yo I know C.A.L.I. is gonna come up in here and say some shit about how I'm riDin' her but ummm...I'd have to go wid LadyFiya on this cuz even though I ain't get a couple of her punchez, the ones that WEREN'T over my head (likely cuz iono you) were creative and her werdplay was kiLLin' your verse duke...your structure is SHIT on a platter and your punchez are played as HELL man...she didn't come as good as she could've but she covered punchez and her wordplay both being more creative than anything in your verse...F.Y.I. to whoever said something about flow, this is TEXT, flow doesn't matter 'til you pick up a mic, just don't stretch your bars...

VOTE: Lady Fiya

^no One Your A Hater And Mad I Wouldnt Let You In C.s 2 Your Her Friend Three My Strture Is Perfect Idiot Its Lining The Punches Damn Your Dumb My Punches And Personals Were Way Better You Never Heard That Frozen Line Show Anything Similar And Ill Leave Rv So No Bitch Your Lieing And I Heard Your Audios You Fucking Suck A I Daughter Wack Clone Fucking Wack Wack Wack And You Been Ducking Me Therefore You Opinon Dont Count AND YES BITCH FIYA HAS MORE D.R THEN ANYONE ON THIS SITE PERIOD THATS WHY SHE KEEPS POSTING PICS SHE CAN FRONT ALL SHE WANT BUT AINT NO REASON TO KEEP POSTING PICS SHE DO THAT ON PURPOSE

U dragrace hygiene cuz u iron jeans in driveways, Q’s dame?
Not being profane, u got “D” fault wins 2 like ur user name…
…your parked riders in reverse to start and end on E*
He beefs wit Jury cuz Flow ONLY made you a-ttorney!
U won respect as an artist?! Can’t even throw a hard hit..
With a name this bitch stole from commercials for carpet!

vs.

You not nice you just got more dickriders then most porn sets
Made a thread you was (leaving 2 months ago..........)



now show me them tities ;)
....what the fuck you aint gone yet?!

^^thanQ.. i'm sorry cali but people that said you won put FLOW and STRUCTURE over personals and punches.. you had only one.. i knew i might have to breakdown the first bar..

well i said he drag-race... tha Q is gay (drag), he so FUCKIN FAT he has to iron his XXXL jeans in driveways... (race)..... i thought y'all would get that part.. oh well..

you had no solid hits at me (IMO).. and that ghostwriter line was hella played and you put that as a closer..

**this site obviously puts flow and structure OVER punches and personals.. which i have yet to find out why in the hell why.. **

but i respect the opinions and feedback, keep it coming kiddos.. :thumbup: and CALI wtf? i only had a few pics, i didn't even post none when i first came here.. it took months before i actually posted a pic.. but if u talkin bout my lil' fashion show.. shit i did it cuz i want to.. you the one gettin a yearly award for d/r's so don't point that bullshit at me.. even your dickriders voted you, now that's what i call sad.. if i had any rider that you mention of i wouldn't still have a battle open vs. Anxiety for over 4 months.. now talk and say sumthin..

It puts flows an structure ahead of everything because without the flow an structure there is no verse, its basically jokes, an not rhymes

Aint Tha Place To Post,but I Think Lady Got This One...no Hate Cali...why Post This Here Tho?

^no... text doesn't have a "flow" it depends on who's reading it... cuz if i spit that on a beat i guarantee it would sound nothing like how 1 person read it.. and it would flow perfectly if i leave 1 or 2 words out.. but i see what E Looch was sayin... my goodness. *smh*

They play it in Detroit as well. Nice verse, but whether you would have won is questionable. Why don't you all just agree to post your verses in another battle?

i want feedback, j dot that's y.. :)

i was gonna do that, but i set up another thread yesterday & i checked and cali didn't.. i sent him a pm while he was online too.. so i said fuck it and posted it this mornin.. i dun care about a win (like the title says) i want feedback on this.. :)

Ah aight. Well I liked your punches. It's nice to see creativity. What's your AIM Fiya? We need to talk.

Lady, the way you worderd your verse is just all wrong, thats what people are getting at, i'm not trynna hate, because you have alot more creativity than C.A.L.I, an dont think i dont hate him neither, the boys a bigger bitch than you are (jokes)...but yeah, your structure was just choppy as hell, it had no rythm too the flow, maybe it would have sounded better on audio, who knows? ....but thats not the point because this is audio, i had this arguement with Kon.Fliktz few days ago, these people have a certain structure an style, an if the vets on this site have a diffrent style ta you, then you basically have too adapt too it, as i am trying ta do, because my flows are diffrent as are yours too most people on the site, understand where i'm coming from?

^^i ain't trippin on that.. i know wording is crazy.. but like i said flow does not go above punches, my goodness.. and everybody got their own style in my opinion, you'd be a fool to try to adapt to someone else's style.. i do kno what you tryna get at. but on that adapt theory i find that negative.. that would make the site very boring if everybody had the same style fa a verse. i'd be like o hell no, i can't follow other people. i have to be my own person when i'm rappin or whateva, i gotta bring my own shit. i'm not tryna argue i posted my verse to see where everybody on here is coming from.. thanx i got where you coming from.. :thumbup:

LOL ^^

people basically do have the same styles tho

Ya have the odd few people that come multi crazy, but other then that, most people have the same style..............

But its whatever, i posted adiquit feedback a few pages back, an that was an honest opinnon, you came heard, just not hard enuff, you dont need elevation or nothin, he just worded his verse better than you did, thats all

since I need to repeat myself...I said the same thing you said Fiya, lol...

U dragrace hygiene cuz u iron jeans in driveways, Q’s dame?
Not being profane, u got “D” fault wins 2 like ur user name…
…your parked riders in reverse to start and end on E*
He beefs wit Jury cuz Flow ONLY made you a-ttorney!
He can’t make it nowhere, so he changed his name to CALI
Pump orgasms in your arteries, give E the heart to beat me
Flattened Saucony’s, who goes to prison for stabbing “things”?!
He plays for Crème, look how early you put out the Black Queen!
I don’t mean Chess, post all over the board can’t find recess-
Shun, my crew’s for elevation, don’t think you need-less!
Stick lyrics to monorails, cuz not once you held solo tracks
So fuckin wack, S e n s e r spit too, ONLY u got bad feedback!
U won respect as an artist?! Can’t even throw a hard hit..
With a name this bitch stole from commercials for carpet




lady i aint read cali's verse...............but yours was pretty good....honestly though i think i read better from you........ya punches you kinda held back a bit
the first 3 bars were hot but you kinda lost a lil steam as it went on....but i feel overall it was good to read...........so props