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anxiety vs One M.B.
Topical Battle
Topic:The Other Side Of The Story Rules:I don't give a fuck, just make it 20-40 lines... Good Luck Minimum posts to vote: 100 Check in by: 03-25-05 at 11:48 PM Must drop verse in 4320 minutes after check in. |
One M.B. has ACCEPTED this battle on 03-23-05 12:04 AM.
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yo man accept at least.... you got like 3 days to drop.
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BLAH CMON yo im not gonna start my verse till you check in... cos otherwise you could no show n shit
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anxiety has ACCEPTED this battle on 03-23-05 10:49 PM.
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Yo... This is a true story... My Dad is paralized, and I fucking hate him... People think I'm "cruel", but no one knows the other side of the story, the reason that I hate him... It's pretty fucking deep, i hope you understand what my mom and my brother and I went through... Only a child, seeing my mom hurt, it was killing me... Dad was never there, never assumed responsibility... Mom had a job, plus taking care of both her kids... Abusive husband, blow to her gut broke 2 of her ribs... Overwhelmed by rage, fuck, you should have saw his eyes... Apparently he didnt care, cause he never apologized... I cried when my brother picked my mom off of the floor... But she was stuck, because without my dad, she was poor... I didn't talk to my dad after that for weeks... Which he thought was disrespectful, so for that, i was beat... My mom and brother watched, unable to do a thing... I went to school with bruises on my face from his ring... Sometimes he was out on buisness, he'd be gone for weeks... I could hear my mom in the other room cry herself to sleep... I thought i could help, everything i tried was useless... And it seemed with each day, he got more and more abusive... But the final straw, that made me lose all respect... Was when he came hom from "work", with lipstick on his neck... Then he found out, that he needed a simple operation... But something went wrong, just one little vibration... Blood vessel cut, subsequently the doctor lost his diploma... It would be 8 months till my Dad woke from the coma... As a result, he's brain damaged, and will never walk again... I think it was meant to be, i think it was god's revenge... Put yourself in my shoes, you think I could ever forgive him??? Thats why both stories need to be told, before forming an opinion... |
Hmmm I was thinking of turning this into a track.. so I wrote it like one.. that’s why theres a hook.. n' shit...
The Other Side of the Story 1 Im tired of bein split, I might just need to quit ya know OMB but not who John Nigro is, i worked hard for this, i spent sleepless nights, destroyed my brain just for a need to write, almost six years now since i been pourin it out, stepped up from freestyles 'n i'm recordin it now, shit, people think i chase impossible dreams, woulda never thought i'd rap but it was possible see, ya gossip is weak, but i aint gonna lose my pride, i choose my life 'n i choose to abuse the mic, So yeah… I really spit, and yeah I nearly quit.. but that was at the start, when i was really shit, 'n now ya'll gonna judge me, if ya wanna thats just weak, fuck please don't listen to my shit if ya just beef. Hook i've spit about everythin with the rhymes i write, now i want ya'll know they guy behind the mic, You don’t understand, lonely and broken I stand, 'cos none a ya'll really even know who I am.. 2 people ask me, "OMB do you do what you spit?", of course i don't, shit no i do it for kicks, i can rap about whatever, maybe violence 'n greed, but thats the joy of a mic, there aint no silencin me, 'cos i'm usually quiet, you know, the back a the crowd, so this rap is my release 'n all the shackles are down, give me a pen 'n a pad 'n i'll vent when i'm sad, vent when i'm mad 'n then i'll even vent when i'm glad, 'n my friends'll tell me, i should try 'n get signed up, but i just wanna rhyme without tyin my mind up, freedom of speech is something One allows me, 'cos if you met john he'd probably shut his mouth see, i'ma split personality, confusin i'm sure, i got two alter ego's, yeah, who woulda thought, ya'll can call me crazy, say i'm off a my head man, i'm just tellin the truth, gettin it off a my chest, damn.. I got so much to tell, just hope my throat can bare it But there's OMB 'n John, please don't compare 'em, 'n don't go runnin’ ya mouth, all sayin ya know me, Just 'cos ya heard this track, doesn’t make you my homie I do this for love and for glory, its what im tryna’ implore, see, So this is just to give you the other side'a the story |
Look at our closers man... Good fucking topical, gonna be nice to see how people vote... I forgot your Mr. Multi, i shoulda remembered, and threw my multies in...
Goodluck man. |
Word this should be a good battle lol
Good luck as well. |
Lets get some votes in this bitch...................
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This was feedback posted for anxiety
is this really a true story?
wow. thats real. both were good drops. im not gonna vote on this one. |
Yes this a true story..............................
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Some would consider that bit at the start swaying -_-
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If i didnt put that there then nobody would know why I'm writing about that... The whole point was because I hate my dad, and people think im cruel for hating him, and i was telling "The other side of the story"...
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Yeah its all good. .
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^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
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Voted For: anxiety
bahh, such a good battle.... OMB...really good story, great imagery...thought this piece really progressed nicely, but i felt it really lacked emotion, i just didnt' connect as well to your verse as i did with anxiety's, and i think thats what really separated these two....very close though....but i feel your choice of words/vocab...since you made it more of a song, i think it took away alot of descriptive words that you could have used and brought out more emotion and depth to your piece....overall, its a really good piece, i could get into it and everything, its a real good story...but just felt you were lacking in emotion, compared to anxiety....everythin else was cool too, structure, flow...yeah aight, anxiety....this was a real good piece, to me anyways....i really connected with it because your choice of wording and vocab was excellent, really painted a picture, and the emotion was predominant in this piece....i just felt submerged in your story and couldnt really turn away....really good flow, great structure, and again....i feel thats what separated you two, you were able to emphasize the emotional factor alot more....and thats what got you my vote. v/anxiety.......(ps good f'in battle) |
since im uppin this for ya....haha, could anyone of you drop a vote on one of my battles.....them shits have been open for mad long....word
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Voted For: One M.B.
yo... just posting to get my post counts up... so i can be a vet and shit.. Vote disqualified for inadequate feedback. Please see this thread if you need help on what qualifies as an acceptable explanation. |
Voted For: anxiety
omb - i liked yours . but it sorta left me i don't know turned off. i don't know. but you had alot of good vocab and imagery . i just wasnt feeling it. the format of it was a lil off i guess. so it sorta affected the flow you coulda made your lines longer so things would have been more connected and you woudl have been able to drop more.. but none the less a smooth drop anx.- wow a very very powerful drop. i liked it alot because it was so unique.you really took the topic and juiced it for what it was worth. i liked your imagery alot it took the reader on a ride. a emotional rollercoaster if you must. over all i just connected with your piece because you used strong wordplay and vocab. i could see everything you wrote and thats why i am picking yours because it really allowed the reader to see what was going on Vote.anxiety because he used a very vivid vocab spread as well as a very very nice topic choice no hate nice drop to both |
Upping............................................
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Voted For: anxiety
damn... anxiety really came through on this one... OMB..you my man 50 grand...but Anxiety definitely got the edge on ya this time around... O... i felt ya story and ya shyt was pretty good but i've seen ya come at ya rhymes so much better than this... i felt ya story line but apoints it just seemed like ya needed to add something... almost like ya couldn't get out what ya wanted to say.. and for that i deducted points... loved the hook, though... i think if it was rewritten and ya took ya time with it this would be a really dope piece... Anxiety... damn dawg... i really feel where ya coming from being that i, myself was in a similar situation growing up... story was well thought out...well it was a true story so the feeling was definitely in it... i wouldn't change anything about it... the consistency throughout was on point... each sentence flowed into the next...all ideas connected flawlessly... and the ending was damn near perfect... good job by both but i gotta give it up for Anx |
uppin this joint... i got a battle going on in FL against Lyrical Clarity... too lazy to find the link right now....lol... holla back and drop a vote on that so we can close it out...thanks
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Voted For: One M.B.
this was a close battle in my opinion.. but I think OMB took it... lemme break it down anxiety- the story you were tellin was good and it was very simple/easy to read but also you had alot of emotion in it.. its very easy to see where you're coming from when i read it.. thats a few reasons why i liked your verse but i would have enjoyed more multis in there, i'll explain why in a moment... OMB- The story you were tellin was different but i enjoyed it. yous was also easy to read but complex at the same time with the multis. Personally i think the emotion and story telling was on the same level but I feel OMB got this with his multis. And i know its not a battle but its harder to tell a story when you're ryhming more than one syllable. know what i mean? don't hate on this vote.. im just sayin its harder to tell a story with multis and make it all flow together without forcing things and OMB did it pretty flawlessly... RTF- http://community.rapverse.com/showb...41&page=1&pp=15 |
Topicals aren't about multies exactly, but sall good... Upping.
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This was feedback posted for One M.B.
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Voted For: One M.B.
oooooooooooooooooooooopppppppppppppppssssssss...my bad Vote disqualified for inadequate feedback. Please see this thread if you need help on what qualifies as an acceptable explanation. |
Voted For: anxiety
i didn't even feel like finishing omb's so you win cuz i finished yours and go chills 3 times while reading it... good shit, dq this if you want w/e Vote disqualified for inadequate feedback. Please see this thread if you need help on what qualifies as an acceptable explanation. |
wtf at the last two gay votes.............................
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This was feedback posted for One M.B.
checkin pollz...
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This battle has the shittiest voting I have ever seen in my life... (Not talking to people w/ explained votes)
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Its been at least a few months now that its been open -_-
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Voted For: One M.B.
I think that One Man Band got this battle because i feel that One Man Band came stronger in the following categories...Topic i felt One Man Band got it was effective and was on point Anxiety also cme dope on the topic too OMB got me readin more though, ya story was dope too it had emotion but i still feel u shoulda been a bit more creative on this occasion rhyming i felt went to One Man Band good lookin wordplay and creativity goes to none as both came strong and flow and structure i'll give to One Man Band. V/One Man Band There's my sig be sure to return the favour honestly within 3 days or vote removed :thumbup: |
2 days............................................
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Voted For: One M.B.
OK, first off props to both, voth of the verses were [acked with deep emotion and feelings, were a good read. Im gonna give this one to OMB simply because his was easier to get directly involved with, was feeling the storyline more. Also it had a better flow to it and good imagery...you should do it audio. No hate anxiety, your was dope as hell too....just not feelin it as much. NO HATE RTF VS E.C in 3 days please.... |
rtf man, it will be deleted! .
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I will when I get home from work
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checking polls...damn...i voted on this shyt eons ago!!!
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yeah man. This shit been open for as long as I can remember
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Booo @ this battle still being open...............
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