mizz fyre vs Ghost
 

Battle Rules:Toical Battle

14-20 UNLIMITED Lines
Already Know no CREW VOTES
No Recycling
Better Be no Bitin
Ya Know Da ROUTINE!

Topic:Wordz Of Wisdom



Minimum posts to vote: 100

Check in by: 05-24-05 at 03:55 PM

Must drop verse in 4320 minutes after check in.

Ghost has ACCEPTED this battle on 05-21-05 10:52 PM.

First Topical Battle.....
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Its the Wordz Of Wisdom I Speak,Its Straight Honesty That Gainz Fame
"Stay Up On Ya Feet",Cuz Once your Down You Cant Maintain
Couple Of Wordz Could Change Ya Life,Due To The Way Their Excepted
but Alwayz Think Postive,N You Will Alwayz Be Respected
~*~
In a Blink Of an Eye People Dyin Without A Trace
Sorrow Fillin The Air,But To Most People Just Another Missin Case
Wordz Of Wisdom Shall Heal Ya Mind,Let The Wordz Fill Your Thought
Let All The Good Things Remain,N Let All Evil Things Go To Rot
~*~
Succeed To Do As So,Ur Self Esteem Shall React In Loss Of Grief
But Feel The Drain Of Pain,As Your Body Replies With Relief
Still In Remembrance Of Da Past,What You Left Behind Shall Not Be Mentioned
Only Speak Whats Good For Da Future,N You Will Be Noticed With great Attention
~*~

Open Ya Eyez n see Whatcha Accomplished,N See Where youve Been Placed
Dont Look Into the Past,You'll be Astonished Of Whatcha Faced
So Just Sit Back N Enjoy -Life- While It Remainz On Earths Surface
No Turnin Back Now,If You Do Whats your Purpose!

(First Topical Battle Verse)!

mizz fyre has ACCEPTED this battle on 05-22-05 06:36 PM.

Trees swaying, I watch as the park is a host to children playing
Listening intently, in awe at every word my mother is saying
Praying that I’ll remember it later, but all I can hear is laughter
Hoping there’ll be a translation when she tells it to me after

She slips her hand inside mine, and I squeeze her hand tight
Igniting a bond between us something only we could alight
I turn for a second to glance at her face, its so full of glory
Words of wisdom, she utters…dear now , listen to my story

A mothers story

An area with inviting open spaces including a variety of races
A district so close that everyone memorised each others faces
Paces so fast, that children were having children, it was crazy
Youngsters, of just twelve smoking stuff to make them hazy

I got caught up in this world of lies and deceit, street crime
Miming lyrics to songs that had meaning, writing rhymes
My momma use to preach knowledge, that I used to shun
Telling me the same words Ima tell you, never do as I done

................
I look up from my baby carriage my eyes wide and so bright
Momma strokes my face gently, I open my mouth in delight
She tells me one day, I’ll fulfil all the dreams she’s planned
I smile gracefully, an effort to portray that I understand……….

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upppin ya'll......lets get the votes in............

uppppiiin Yo Mayne We need Dem Votes know What I MEAN!DEUCEZ!N Vote!HollaAtcha Boy!

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upppppppppiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn 4 votes damnit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

wow.....can't we get no votes up in here...................

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This was feedback posted for mizz fyre
 

yeh fam, you dropped solid in this..really felt your imagery and emotion...

Good looking ma!

c'mon ya'll uppin this....................................

still upppppppppppppppppppppppppppppinnnnnnn this....

Voted For: mizz fyre

Not a bad topical battle ok ima break this down

Ghost...nice 1st attempt the topic was there it just aimed direction in my opinion flow was good a lil stretched the wording and style was good but i think a stronger story was needed really you were jus sayin stuff that was on topic but there was hardly any imagery or depth into you topical also closer didn't rhyme which hindered the verse but all in all it was a good piece and you'll get better as you go on.

Mizz Fyre...your verse this time round i was feelin it had a story to it and kept a vivid imagery to it...a mothers story a very nice way to go off such an interesting topic the flow and structure was very easy to read and decently laid out this IMO was the winning verse i could picture a mother sitting on a bench talkin to her baby and i liked that.

v/Mizz Fyre...RTF on my battle (vs accomplish) within 3 days or vote removed :thumbup:

Voted For: mizz fyre

Yo Tite Topical Here Frum All Yall

Mizz Fyre U Came Wid Alot Of Deep Emotional ''Words Of Wizdom'' Dat Wuld Be Pecise 2 Yo GrandKidz Inna Few Years :thumbup: But Yo, Alot Ov Creativity Frum Both Here, Both Yall Wuz On Poiint Wiv Da Schemez Ov Da Topicz, Complex Concepts Frum Ghost, But Da Vocan & Emotion Wuz Lackin, & Dat Wuz Mizz Fyre Had, Yall Both Came Creative Wid It, But Mizz Fyres Deep Creative Scheme Getz Her Mah Vote

Holla@Da Link Below Plz, Drop A Vote, Da Battle Iz Whack, It Wuz Mah First Battle, But All Da Mo Reazon 2 Get It Closed!
http://community.rapverse.com/showb...ad.php?t=191943

^^^aight....uppin ya'll...........................

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uppin this........................................

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+uppin............................................ ..............................!

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Voted For: mizz fyre

Mizz fyre- Uh ok. You had great imaginary. the flow of it was some-what poetic. The emotion you had in this verse was average, i say put more feelings to it. The concept you approach in this verse was good. I just say put more feelings to it, nice imaginary though.

Ghost- alright, ok for a first topical. The best aspect from your verse was imaginary, but the imaginary wasn't great nor weak just average. I didnt feel no emotion from your verse, nah nothing. You need to upp on your vocab (you too mizz fyre), but it was ok for a first, just need to work on imaginary and emotion.


Overall=This was kinda like an one-sided battle, I'mma have to vote on mizz fyre because she came good with a nice approach. Her imaginary and emotion just won it in this battle. Ghost your verse was ok for a first but it didnt have that "better" imaginary, your emotion is what's lacking in your topical verse, so i vote for mizz fyre for better imaginary and emotion (elevate on that part)............1

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Uppin this motherfka!...........................!n even if i do lose this battle its cuz its my first topical battle!but its all good!mizz yo shyt was hot ma!i was feelin ya verse!ive just been bizzy with other shyt to up this!but uPPIN!

^^^yep yours was a good verse to.....especially for your first topical...........uppin

uppin for da loss LOL............................................... .................................................. ...............