Us
 

Us..

When I first met you I could feel vivid emotions.
Scents of body lotions, and eyes blue as oceans.
My notions and intentions of us together were great..
The late phonecalls at night inbetween daily dates.
Nothing else could realate, to the feelings inside me..
And the way you always found ways, to really suprise me.
But I started to see, the love we had was lacking fun..
And It seemed that what had sprung was acctually done.
But we were still young, what really did we know?
With hands intertwined, but still nowhere to go..
And nothing to show for all the days we had spent..
A relationship with the intent of becomming torment.
Till it reached it's decent, and the feelings broke..
With tempers provoked, we parted on a terrible note.
And we've barely spoke since those days of our love.
It's left me deprived of what my life consists of..
Walking out of a thing I enjoyed from the beginning..
With an imprinting I'll cherish as long as I'm living.

- Soul Rebel..

http://community.rapverse.com/showp...00&postcount=28

^ Link..

Damn, I can't believe you made a song about us, man. :love:

lmao j/p... but yea, this was some good shit, yo. Really feelin' this issh. Nice flow in this bitch. Good imagery. Made me go, "OH DAMN I WISH I WAS HIS GIRL!!!!" <lmao j/p. It didn't. but it was dope. weerd... RTF on my and Zig Zaggy's Get Low Remix. weerdness........ :shoot:

Thanks homie, I'll leave feed ASAP..

...............

man, check this flow out

Nothing else could realate, to the feelings inside of me..
And the way you always found ways, to keep on suprising me.

But we were still young, what really did we know?
With hands intertwined, but still nowhere to go..
Walking out of a thing I enjoyed from the beginning..
With an imprinting I'll cherish as long as I'm living.

worrrrd, i already read this, but im just doper for leaving feed

:nono: @ not leavin' feed. *takes out e-glock full of e-jizz* :shoot:

RTF FOO!!!!!!!!!!! :shoot:

not bad at all... good vocab, flow, and multies.. im feelin this for real, coulda used a littllleee more emotion nd less hot rhymes, but as far as ya lyrical goes.. 7/10

...............

great peice, the flow realli was great fav lines...

But we were still young, what really did we know?
With hands intertwined, but still nowhere to go..
Walking out of a thing I enjoyed from the beginning..
With an imprinting I'll cherish as long as I'm living.

you got good vocab, great imagination... good work... uppin for this...

yo SOuld This Shyt Was Really Emotional N i Was Diggin it Homie!just the TITLE i was Like "US"?but Its All good!Imaginary Was There,SStructure Was Good,Vocab Was Nice,N Stayin On Subject Was NICE definately!My favorite linez were the Whole verse!the vocab had me Like WHOAH!Nice Drop Honestly!Keep That Dope Emotional Shyt Up Homie!And pleaz Return The Favor In My "Wall n Twisted Diss"!(Link Below)!HollaBack Atcha Homie!!
~Overall 9/10~

Weerd...

Thanks for the feed...

Uppin..

good, good, u made up a good structure in this ma fucka man
vocab was of the zhizzle, flow never lost
I'll give it a 10 out of 10, for good creativity n shit^^^ pc out homie....

^ 10/10

I feel special..

/thanks..

Up.............

Nobody wants go give me some love, or did all the kids that leave feed allready do it?

lol, this was fucking dope man, flow was craaaaaaaaaaaaaaazy, and the wording was good, structure everything, I really can't find much wrong bout this, and im not just saying that cuz we coo', I really like this line:

But we were still young, what really did we know?
With hands intertwined, but still nowhere to go..

and the closer was illy, when I write, that my fav. part is the closer, I always try to make it with an impact or like a coo' closer that says something, it was dopeness, 8.7895/10 weerd

rtf in poetic scriptures, "A Wilted Rose" done under the acount of ~Ronin~ weerd

^ Thanks homie.

Up.......

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerd...

u spit some crazy shit lol im neva gunna step in yo way lol.......nice job i give u mad props............i like it a lot i cant even rag on u......structure vocab multis all there man......nice job

i'd shit on this verse :shoot:

i wrote half of it

^ haha, man, lets get some OEs tomorrow eh

should we, any parties?

or we can just randomly do it fool

I LOVE BOOBS

^ Lmao at I wrote half of this...hahaha lying bitch...get off my dick...

/Weeeeerd, call me when you get off worked, I owned my exam today...


Uppppppin...

nice, i called your house but you weren't home :shoot:

so sweet, sleep inn-age tomorrow