Unspoken bond between writers
 

yeah i know the structures off but i was writin it to a beat.

Why do I constantly pick up this pen to write?
Why is my life striving 4 my spot in the light with a mic?
2 ppl the songs all sound the same,so i'll try my best to explain.
Even with all the beef, we all really the same.
see, Hip Hop happens to be the sound of the streets
& we share love 4 storytellin over the sound of a beat
we go thru similar things but express it wit different words
we could produce the same line if we lived in different worlds!
It's like i need to write just to keep myself alive
and those arent tears drippin from my eyes when i cry
My tears are ink, and when they spill on the page
My demons and sorrows r released and so is the rage
The beat of the song is the like the beat of my heart
& without the spark it gives me, my life wouldnt start
We share the same spark, that y i show love 2 the writers
because to me all poets and emcees are fighters
cuz u gotta be courageous to expose ur soul
n evrytime the pen drips u let a piece of it go
~~~~~~~~~This is our life blood~~~~~~~~
it bonds us 2gether like brothers and sisters
we understand each utha whether we scream it r whisper
To me, between us theres an unbroken bond of trust
and as i read ur soul theres an unspoken form of love.

feedback
left feed on this 2

kool, appreciated man! the beat was Nas-the message lol

liked this, very good, emotion stood out the most, flow was good, imagery was nice, good read overall, keep it up

thanx 4 the feed, i'll return the favour :)

Uppinnnnnnnn.....left feed on
feedback is appreciated and will be returned! :)

28 views and 2 replies!!!! :shocked: y'all just saw the word sex n thot this was porn r sumthin! *cries*

Yo, I likes this right hea. It's tight and flows good.

thank u knaledg1, good lookin out! :)

this was smooth, being a spoken word poet myself i can relate to some of the stuff

you need a little more umph with your words tho, more imagery, better wording woudlint hurt nither

like really dig down deep and give your point of view and spill out the emotions

you did good with this peice, feels like a spur of the moment type thing, but i dug it and got the message you were giving

would like to hear this as an audio with no beat, just the words

yeah lol it was definitely a spur of the moment thing, i cant plan what im gna write at all it jus happens, n i had it finished within the nas instrumental lol, i jus think more emotion comes thru that way, but i am gna take time to work on a piece soon enuff.

yeah thanx chalk, much appreciated, gimme a link and I'll RTF :thumbup:

yea homie it was ill man keep it up homie!!!!!!!!!!!doin big things!!!!!!ayo RTF later when i drop my latest song on OM mayn in like 15 minutes so look out for it in new posts homie peace it's called"in the game"peace

This was an-all-emotive, that's good, nice lyrics and way of writing it, the flow is great, the only things u need a lil work on is:
-with a rap like this u need a lot of nameplay
-elevate your vocab

overall 8/10.. real nice... peace

lol thanx, but i cant use nameplay, it wasnt about anybody in particular! :huh: but yeah, thanx a lot 4 the feed! :)

That was good, good lyrics and showed your emotions well.

nice stuff man..but u really didnt come to complex in ur vocab try writing big words and rhyming them. Also ur flow was good I liked ur structure pretty normal, but the main thing is better vocab. I usually take 10-20 minutes to write a piece with big words so im sure u can take the time too lol. Also u need to end stronger, like since u wrote about this which has been done before then u need to make everything rhyme and on point, and love and truct dont rhyme lol. But keep writing and readin you'll get better fast man keep it up-PEACE

i don't think i've read any of your stuff before but i thought this was pretty good.....you came strong with the emotion....however work on your structure and upp your vocab......5/10

yer i thort this woz good, it flowed really well, and it woz easy to follow. 8/10
rtf on sumthin in my sig

yea.....shit was good....keep writing man....work on your vocab. man........overall it was good though......8/10.....