Deranged vs shodown
 

Battle Rules:

12-16 Lines
No Crew Votes
No Recycling
No Biting

I put more time due to the fact that it's late and I may go to bed soon..I'ma still try to get my verse done tonight though

so with that being said...good luck :thumbup:

Minimum posts to vote: 20

Check in by: 09-03-05 at 01:58 AM

Must drop verse in 1440 minutes after check in.

shodown has ACCEPTED this battle on 09-03-05 01:01 AM.

Deranged has ACCEPTED this battle on 09-03-05 01:03 AM.

yo man WANT ME TO POST FIRST?!?!?!?!?!

????????????

don't matter....................I'm most likely gonna post in a half hour or so....

u a pussy...a puppy with his tail between his leg,house or in street
this dude's shook at me..in front me..on his knees...beggin for no beef^^
retarded MC's startin to bleed from when I stab ur neck n turn it blue
and ur mind's phased..cuz in ur profile....you still reppin 2 crews
and to top it off...you a faggot..eatin cocks n tastin..what is this?
tied up with more buea's(bows) than Playstation's at christmas
i ain't steppin to you..u already squashed up..n seein it lighter
& ur profile's right in ways...cuz your bio is being a rider (writer)
u leave the personals in the blue..for me to leave u pissin n puke
this shit's like your own name..cuz you'll end up missin a W
I luv troublin you cuz if there's a gang for those afraid to bust,u elite
n ur aim's bein real...cuz your spits cuase tons of choas n put us to sleep*
this site's a fiesta for hot cliques...but ur crew ain't show for the party
n that crew of herbs better start that movement already..& leave RV
vanquish outta here...but in the game..u unseen at the bottom height
& ur due(dew) to disappear like a wodden porch on autumn nights


*his aim is "chaos_hypnotics@hotmail.com"......hypnotics-sleep...get it?

post your verse homie.............................

kk



yo man SAME HERE CUZ IM WIT MY GIRL FIRST SO HOLD UP!!!!!!!


ill drop in like 20-30 minutes but its all good as long as non of us get DQ right?!?!?!

peace

this guy gon talk shit like he a NATURAL
i'll have his face re arrenged,call me the animal
i'll load my glock...step up front...and blast his head
cuz this gon be the last time this nigga goes 2 bed
everytime they post who has the wackest skillz they put the blame on you.
shit im lyrically gift u just paranoid..............so muthafuck wat ya gon do...
nigga u deranged.............kk yea man thats true
u think you gon win but tell people stop lyin to you..
ill demolish this fool he dissolve so quick...
quicker than ur girl was SUCKIN on my DICK!
this is a KO lyrical knockout the crowd roarin
where is ur god now?!?!?!...just another MC im floorin...
ill break this fool i was taght to never aim...
so ima grab this fool beat him to death...bash his brain
my be a classic ur brain took too much damage its dented
you aint got no fuckin skills ur fuckin herb ur generic ur skillz is rented.

hahaha man KK I DROPPED SO NOW I ASK FOR URS AND SAY UPPIN FOR VOTES!!!!!

uppin.............................................

hahah nice drop!!!!!!!!!

yo but i aint got AIM!!!!!!

ooh...well...Aim=hotmail...I'm sure the voters will catch on......

hahaha

yea!!!!!!

man i say i lost!!!!!!

WERD nice wordplay

uppin for votes...................................

uppin.............................................

uppin for that 1st vote...........................

This was feedback posted for shodown
 

polzz homey, both had good verses....................

yo MAN WERD!!!! uppin man


waitin on the first vote c'mon

uppin.............................................

uppin.............................................

ayo men c'monm someone fukin vote.....what the fucks the use of battles when niggaz dont wanna vote

uppin.............................................

damn....this shit gettin annoying now.............

uppin.............................................

uuuuuuuuuuuuuppppppppppppppppiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnn

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man this shit is annoyin as hell

someone fuckin vote

uppin.............................................

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Voted For: Deranged

u a pussy...a puppy with his tail between his leg,house or in street
this dude's shook at me..in front me..on his knees...beggin for no beef^^
^^heh, ok
retarded MC's startin to bleed from when I stab ur neck n turn it blue
and ur mind's phased..cuz in ur profile....you still reppin 2 crews
^^meh, weak
and to top it off...you a faggot..eatin cocks n tastin..what is this?
tied up with more buea's(bows) than Playstation's at christmas
^^simple but okish
i ain't steppin to you..u already squashed up..n seein it lighter
& ur profile's right in ways...cuz your bio is being a rider (writer)
^^stretched IMO, so kinda weak
u leave the personals in the blue..for me to leave u pissin n puke
this shit's like your own name..cuz you'll end up missin a W
^^nice personal
I luv troublin you cuz if there's a gang for those afraid to bust,u elite
n ur aim's bein real...cuz your spits cuase tons of choas n put us to sleep*
^^not too bad
this site's a fiesta for hot cliques...but ur crew ain't show for the party
n that crew of herbs better start that movement already..& leave RV
^^ok
vanquish outta here...but in the game..u unseen at the bottom height
& ur due(dew) to disappear like a wodden porch on autumn nights
^^kinda badly worded but ok concept

also man, you need to work on making it flow more smoothly, a lot of your lines were too stretched

vs.

this guy gon talk shit like he a NATURAL
i'll have his face re arrenged,call me the animal
^^nah non-witty threat
i'll load my glock...step up front...and blast his head
cuz this gon be the last time this nigga goes 2 bed
^^*yawn* talking about gun threats on the web - sorry man, this straight labels you a newb

everytime they post who has the wackest skillz they put the blame on you.
shit im lyrically gift u just paranoid..............so muthafuck wat ya gon do...
^^1st line ok, 2nd line is wack - don't question...diss!
nigga u deranged.............kk yea man thats true
u think you gon win but tell people stop lyin to you..
^^weak
ill demolish this fool he dissolve so quick...
quicker than ur girl was SUCKIN on my DICK!
^^ wack
this is a KO lyrical knockout the crowd roarin
where is ur god now?!?!?!...just another MC im floorin...
^^nah, wack self glory (self glory only works if it's funny and witty)
ill break this fool i was taght to never aim...
so ima grab this fool beat him to death...bash his brain
^^nah, threats also only work if they're funny and witty, this is just a waste of space
my be a classic ur brain took too much damage its dented
you aint got no fuckin skills ur fuckin herb ur generic ur skillz is rented.
^^well at least you're dissing him here, but nothing original, so it's weak.

no hate, you're just new that's all, battle some easier people to elevate first

deranged wins easily

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Voted For: Deranged

good open cuzzo {u a pussy...a puppy with his tail between his leg,house or in street
this dude's shook at me..in front me..on his knees...beggin for no beef^^} and u were nice the whole way thoo...good shit main. Thoo I dont like tha way u ended it

man whatever i know fasho i aint no herb you fuckin lil shits hahaha

lookin all hard shit u just joined...

uppin........

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Voted For: Deranged

shodown verse

this guy gon talk shit like he a NATURAL
i'll have his face re arrenged,call me the animal
^ meh opener wordplay on his name but self-g kinda

i'll load my glock...step up front...and blast his head
cuz this gon be the last time this nigga goes 2 bed
^ not feelin it not a punch...meh bar

everytime they post who has the wackest skillz they put the blame on you.
shit im lyrically gift u just paranoid..............so muthafuck wat ya gon do...
^ na not feelin again...too self glorified

nigga u deranged.............kk yea man thats true
u think you gon win but tell people stop lyin to you..
^ hmm again needs work IMO

ill demolish this fool he dissolve so quick...
quicker than ur girl was SUCKIN on my DICK!
^ played...na...to me that says you prematurely cum...shoulda thought that bar out better

this is a KO lyrical knockout the crowd roarin
where is ur god now?!?!?!...just another MC im floorin...
^ meh...more self-glory

ill break this fool i was taght to never aim...
so ima grab this fool beat him to death...bash his brain
^ na again not feeling punch/diss isn't strong at all

my be a classic ur brain took too much damage its dented
you aint got no fuckin skills ur fuckin herb ur generic ur skillz is rented.
^ OMG...finally he drops an aight bar...more like that...i'm not saying it's great but thats the approach you need in these battles

derranged verse



u a pussy...a puppy with his tail between his leg,house or in street
this dude's shook at me..in front me..on his knees...beggin for no beef^^
^ quote helped this personal hit...good researching

retarded MC's startin to bleed from when I stab ur neck n turn it blue
and ur mind's phased..cuz in ur profile....you still reppin 2 crews
^ aight bar i guess he ain't in a crew no more lol

and to top it off...you a faggot..eatin cocks n tastin..what is this?
tied up with more buea's(bows) than Playstation's at christmas
^ aight bar ok punch good diss

i ain't steppin to you..u already squashed up..n seein it lighter
& ur profile's right in ways...cuz your bio is being a rider (writer)
^ ok personal...

u leave the personals in the blue..for me to leave u pissin n puke
this shit's like your own name..cuz you'll end up missin a W
^ W&L bars are kinda played but aight i guess

I luv troublin you cuz if there's a gang for those afraid to bust,u elite
n ur aim's bein real...cuz your spits cuase tons of choas n put us to sleep*
^ not feelin this bar

this site's a fiesta for hot cliques...but ur crew ain't show for the party
n that crew of herbs better start that movement already..& leave RV
^ meh ok i guess

vanquish outta here...but in the game..u unseen at the bottom height
& ur due(dew) to disappear like a wodden porch on autumn nights
^ nice closer good bar

Overall
shodown...work on it is all i can say ya text flow was aight...but everything else was extremely meh about it only your closer was considered a reasonabley good diss but other than that i think u'd only win if this was a self-glorification match...coz you had mad amounts of that in your verse.

Derranged aight verse 1st time peeping you u's ok...you're deffo more elevated than sho but you could still do wit some work...keep it up though both

V/Derranged...shodown...keep droppin though u'll elevate wit time

Voted For: Deranged

both verses wereight but derangeswas betta he had him in every category so this vote goes to deranged

thx......uppin for one more vote..................

c'mon....uppin for that one more vote.............

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