"That Night" (On some BIG story shit)
 

www.soundclick.com/intermental

"That Night"

peep it, my frist BIG type track...hope u like it...

http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=212883
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=212970

listeing: beat is dope, original concepted bout the phone thing you thing, but gets annoying lol , like the gun reloads you know i think its dope, nice flow man, i think this is your best track, just put less phone thing man, reminds me something that obie and eminem could collab on, like i add a verse you know, could be dope lol, overall nice track man
peace

lol thanks for the feed dawg..........

not bad man, your voice is to slow, get lethal and really spit it like you mean it. but your flow and delivery is fa sho on lock which gives it a nice listen. emotion and lyrics were as well pretty good to me emotion was meh but lyrics were dope fa sho man. but overall I can't wait to hear you in a few years when your voice changes up a bit, just keep workin on it man you'll be a dope artist when your older.

1

Thanks i apreciate it........

Listening:
Im really liking the beat dawg.Im not really liking the slow spitting shit but its nice to see that u can change ya style from 1 sec to another.I like the story style very sweet!A real good flow will nice lyrics!!!!And ur quality is ILL!!!
6/10

lol thanks.....i guess u either feel it or not

beat was dope

u had good breath control


flow wasn't bad

voice cudda been stronger on track...more presence


not ur best...not ur worst

pretty decent track dawg


7/10

I apreciate it...............worked on it in bout 30 mins..but when im back on monday night,..ull see inter comin real strong homie

upppin................

yo i'm feelin this track.....the conept of it......and ur flows betta on this track....

beat is dope too.......lyrics strate too could be upped..........

aiite......

pz

~1~

apreciate it......................

listenin'.....


beat coo....... damn dude you elevated much since I last heard you yo.... you should up volume a lil bit. Phone thing was coo, got a lil annoyin' after a while. Story was tight tho. Quality could be upped a lil. But damn, shit's short. lol But yea, overall nice track man. you elevating a lot. props dude.. 8/10

I apreciate that my nizzle........

flow better you get better with every track
lyrics were nice
not really feeling the beat to be honest its ok jsut repetative
emotion could use some work but overall good track
best one ive hear from you so props
please rtf

thanks Im feelin that.........upppin......i will rtf later

Yea ok...ya flow is def improving..but its basic.......rhyming is basic........the story is basic......an very expected...stories like this dun impress becuz we've all seen movies like this an heard rap songs like this over & over in our lives so its really easy to write a story of this nature.....it really lacked an element of surprise as well..the way u told story I pretty much knew what was gon happen next...didn't really have a plot twist......delivery was koo wit the kinda whispering but need to be changed up from time to time to be entertaining..u over did it wit the phone filter...quality was betetr than some of ya other shit..overall not bad but coulda been wayyyyyyyyy better

Aiight Flow is decent needs some work but meh...like trip said im not feelin tha concept if you use this type of direction ina track im lookin for you to KILL it...delivery is aiight coulda been switched up though...overall track was decent keep doin yo thing son..=1=