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Rise to Power Pt.1
Verse 1 Yo Yo it was Queenz New York, kid was raised in the streets had to hustle to eat Momz was OD'd his Popz heart was skip'n a beat His name started off as Kenny, kid was skinny, but he was sick of the bullshit So went down to Harlem n ran through the liquor store, let off a whole clip Sent to Juvie, got a year and a half, thought out the process as time passed Listen'n to old Raekwon tapes, he figured out how to manipulate the cash Got back on the streets, left his home, Momz didnt realize her only son was gone But he had a plan to make it big even if it meant mow'n lawns He heard about G Money, the god, untouchable, yea the drug lord Now dis was around '88, but he decided to live the gun and die by the sword Now Kenny started off small, run'n robberies for G Moeny, dressed in all black Until the new epidemic came, coincidently it was the begining of crack............... Verse 2 By this time Kenny had a lil fame to his name and was start'n get sum shine Until G Money realized he was almost a boss in no time So he had to get rid of 'em, kill 'em off quick, pretend it was sum shiesty shit Kenny new it was come'n so he caught Money off guard, ended up take'n over his shit Now Kenny was a made man, he had niggaz run'n the streets for him, yea he paid the cost This was the begining of a new era, Kenny had now became Boss See over the years, base heads became worse, started fiend'n for a hit Boss was different from Kenny, he lost his morales, even sold crack to a pregnant bitch Boss didnt no it but he had now become G Money, a heartless bastard who didnt give a fuck But he had an apprentice, and over the years Boss never learned to duck So at the height of his reign, Boss was killed in the cold by the only one he held close His sidekick, runner up to the crown, but he ended up get'n heated wit the toast Over the years he had a good run, but he didnt run wit crew, only a few And the one in his circle who split his wig turned out to be G Money's nephew Now we turn to his story............................................. ...... |
http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post2790887
http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post2790890 there u go fam lemme get sum feed |
ok this was koo...it would sound better on track but this is still nice i like the flow it was koo nice drop my dude stay up and bring the heat!
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yo good look'n son
uppin dis....................... |
yo defitnly not bad wit u being kinda new (most of the time new means new ta rap)
and this being a o.m i was kinda assuming it'll just be another wack o.m like usual but freal this wasnt what i expected....u DEFITNLY have storytelling ur storytelling is best...ur flow is ight it had some rhythm dunno if it'll go to a beat or not..maybe....for it being lyrical it got kinda basic but it kinda hard being lyrical when u plotting out a story while u keep it rhyming so yea no sweat there overall this was decent..i'd give it a 7/10 keep it up young one and u might build urself a reputation (hopefully beyond a website) |
good look'n but yea i got deal wit this indie label in Queenz i'm jus here to test out my material
thnx my nigga uppin |
yea werd up yo ima go and shit but yo if u do audio u should holla at me sometime..and show me some shit freal...pc
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yeah this was aight, flow was good and and all...nedds more imagery to make it more grasping but if ya doing it for audio it should roll. Aight stay up
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that definitly gona be a dope audio for sure man.
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dats wasup fam
uppin dis for sum feed yo |
uppin......................................
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yo lemme get sum feed kid
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Feedback yo..........................
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Sounds mad cool for a starter, and Pt. 1.
I feel like though it loses a bit of flow in verse two somewhere around, Quote:
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i was feeling this i give it a 7.5 , you got nice flow
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ight well man it was a cool story...flow might be on depending on your delivery for text its a lil off with the structure but def can be pulled off in audio..story wasnt bad but needs more imagry to grab attention but keep it up
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uppin.......................
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THAT WAS HARD, FLOW WAS CRAZY, I WISH THAT PEOPLE COULD HEAR THAT, LIVE BUT THAT WASUP KEEP UR HEAD UP PIMPIN.....................................http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=231461.........................................
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it was a nice story tell.... pretty good but like fran el. depending on how u flow is how it goes... still i liked it... ur wording could have been better in some places... in others it was good. u could step up ur vocab a bit. but this was pretty decent. no doubt. good shit... i hope to see u improve some fam. check my shit out. the vibe of words...
and ps to P.A. leave better feed numnut! u aint gonna get fined for each word u right.... all ur feed is less then 2 lines... pick that shit up |
it didnt' really paint an image in my head...it was a pretty good though OM though. i enjoyed readin it though, keep it up
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It Waz Okay..... Topicz Were Played.......... Had A Fast Flow It Hit Good A Couple Times............. Keep Spittin And Try To Be Original Or Expand The Whole Thing
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ok no bad i see were you was goin with this one...you had the flow vocabulary and the complexity in each verse but i couldnt see much imagery in the first verse but thats coo cause you came with that in the second verse..i like what you did here it was a nice piece overall.........stay up...~1~.......
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Gay.........................
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yea thats the thing about writin,usually only the one who wrote it knows how to spit it, so i can see this being audio, but as far as story tellin u got that 2 mane. keep doin what u doin
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it wuz coo mayn-liked da story side of it-got a grasp of how kenny was thinkin--
i didnt like the ending of part 2 couldve been better though but it was nice mayn |
I really enjoyed the story fam... It flowed pretty well. It is tough to tell a story and rhyme plus be complex at the same time, as someone said above. Keep em comin homey.
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Ah, I liked the story it was a pretty good read. I was feelin it, could of used a lil more vocab, but flow was okay and structure was nice. But if this was audio like you were sayin, it would be pretty dope, keep it up.
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yeah man, good shit. wanna see part 2
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I liked it man... Had some nice lines in there. I liked most of it keep it up playya
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i give it a 7 cause i think it was good but it could have been better
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