Dilemma with girl morales .
 

I'm with this chick that I really dig, she's attractive as hell to me, has all the right morales, we agree on everything mentally and physically,

but we have one main conflict.



I want to have kids. She doesn't.

I told her things could change, maybe, over time.

She told me she really thinks she doesn't want to have them.

Your opinions on this ? Things could get ugly if I stay with her for like 16 years of my life thinking she'll come around and want to have children before Menopause, so, I wanted to know what you all thought. Drop your honest two cents about a boy and a girl agreeing on everything except for children.

Would you say one would have to compromise, would you say it's best to not even get involved, or would you say that convincing the other with all their might would be the only choice, but if it's to no avail, give it up ?

Thanks if you're a decent mother fucker. :thumbup:

if she really loves you bro, she would give you that gift...

theres ways of approaching this without anyone losing out.. but the real question is, whats HER reason for not wanting kids?

is it some cliche bull about not wanting to bring up children in this 'fucked up world' ?

or whats the deal here..

cause once you get to the bottom of her reasoning, you can construct a method of bending the rules of her (probable) philosophies to get your way for reasons she views as acceptable over her innitial stubborn approach to the situation..

She does not like kids.

hold old are you again???...not being funny but fa real....
enjoy life....i understand you want kids but hopefully you dont
want kids now....i mean things can change...right now i would
enjoy life and shit because shit is going to change when you bring
kids into the picture....i dont have any but my cousin has one and
shit aint easy....just enjoy your relationship with her...or your time
or how ever you want to put it....see where things go...she may change her mind

It's not that, it's that she was told by some "professional" that before people get into deep relationships (as me and her are moving into) all of their values should not conflict. So I'm making this fucking thread. Got it?

Thanks for the "Enjoy life and don't worry about it" though. I can understand YOUR values right off the bat..

what is that suppose to mean???

lol @ 2v

first off, you dont even have your own place.....get a fucking home before you bring a lil furry faced 2v jr. up in this bitch

second off, FUCK YOU BITCH.....you hated on me having a HEALTHY lil amazing girl...so i hope that your fucking ass never has ANY KIDS. N if you DO have a kid...i hope they got down syndrome

third off....KARMAS A REAL BITCH, NUCCA!

aphilly hows fatherhood treating you?

and 2v the girl will change mentally over time to come so it's not worth giving up or her giving up on you just yet

its awsome dude....shes dope bro. We took her down for her first doctors appt. and the doctor only said she had one problem......

...she sleeps to much.

I was like....i'll deal with that shit

thats the same thing i said

Thanks dark, and Unful.

Unful you said "Have fun and don't let it get to you, you're young"

in other words, if you and dark said exactly the same thing, he at least said it better.

well ahhh well ahh i ahhh lol
look at my last line baby
i said she might change her mind
:thumbup:

I hope she does.. I'll have to work on it... *coughs*

I never wanted to see aphil's pic again... Why the fuck did you sig it? If I wanted to see aphil's ugly ass I woulda entered his picture thread twice. Like everyone on the site has entered mine, at least, twice.

Holla

if she "hates" kids she just might not be ready for the responsibility yet...or just imature for relationship...

how long have u 2 been together? cuz i bet down the road she would want to have children but then again wut do i know

No man, I like this girl a lot. So all the comments about our situation is really appreciated. You know only as much as you can provide.

But me and her have been messing around for not too long, but she's real special to me. Different than most girls, and different from every girl I've been with. So I have faith in her, I just dislike the idea of not having children.

lmaooo sorry i was bored

well...The reason she doesn't want to have kids is because after a session with me...I stretched her out pretty badly...and she was like if this is how painful a nigga dick is...i dont want to know how painful a baby coming out will feel.

j.p man

In being all serious. At my college they did a survey and listend options for girls to pick to not have children

1. Financial
2. The Pain
3. Time Consuming

Basically it was those top three. In that order with some others...She probbaly doesnt want the pain and most likely is scared that shed not be able to support it specially giving our nations financial crisis...Which you should obviously know about.

sounds like tha perfect girl to me. i can't understand it when i see my friends havin kids n shit, too much bullshit that comes along wif it. werd

Good point. It's not like I want a kid soon or anything. I told her we'd be over 30 fuckin' years old before I was gonna have a kid. She said "That's a good age"

but earlier she was just saying "Dont get your hopes up" etc...

so .. word.. thanks for the posts.

Replace her BC pills with sugar ones.

LOL.

............roflmfao, genius

Dick Stole my idea.



That's pretty easy to say considering it won't sit in you for 9 months, harshening everything you do and then come out YOUR vagina. If she really loves you...then she loves you but doing something against your moral code for someone you love isn't being very true to yourself. In fact, if you truly love someone, who's to say you shouldn't go the other way and put yourself through the opposite misery for the good of the person you love.

In all, I can't say i know what you should do here or have any really GOOD advice but i will say this... there are other girls out there.

I realize you really REALLY like this girl but some issues go beyond the realm of love. Having children is often one of them. Finally, agreeing on everything has a tendency to be a killer of a relationship. No one (no matter how much they argue) wants a relationship with no conflict in it. Such a situation will quickly bore the shit out of both of you and since a long term relationship pretty much becomes the never ending struggle to not finally tire of your mate, no conflict will become a chief weapon in that war.

Me and my girlfriend are complete opposites. I'm a rapper, she's a metal head. I'm fairly clean cut and neat, she's a messy, uber pierced, over tattoed freak. We argue, we fight and we love eachother. We're together not because we agree on everything all the time but because we've come to realize that everything we do is a necessary part of my (or her) life and that because we love each other, every choice is made considering her (or my) feelings.

I said we agree on everything morale wise except children.

when it comes to interests and likes, we like to stay at home and chill so that's a good thing, our only conflicting thing is music, whereas she's a metal head and I'm a rapper.

So, rofl @ your situation. Is your chick black?

that's cool homie. thanks for the post.

Looooooool.

That's fuckin awesome.

Nah she's white bro.

And i was just saying that because in the first post i thought you said something about it being important that you have the same interests or something.

how old are you? and dude, if you're just now thinking about dating this girl then that conflict in your opinions shouldn't even be a problem for now. whether or not yall want to have kids TOGETHER is something that will change with your relationship and something you can talk about wayyyyyyyy down the road :thumbup:

It was advised to her that she not get into a -deep- relationship unless it is with someone whose morales are not conflicting with her own.

She brought it up, so here we are.

just cram her baby gap with Spackle and tell her to shut the fuck up for 9 months

Dude your 17 stop thinking about marriage. I was the same as you at your age. Had some chick I thought I loved but na the sex was cloudin my brains. Have fun like everyones saying if it leads to it she'll change her mind on her own. If you can make it 4 months its a miracle worry about 1 month anniversarys before you worry about weddings.