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Mystical Minstrel
hey all would love ta hear what ya all think of my style or if ya even thinks i got potential--let me know yer honest opinion
thanks I'm a phenomenal n logical-mystical minstrel- mixin up some magical music-meltin away the media mayhem-mendin minds-movin mountains-- stoppin the megalomaniacal mysterious madmen- from murdering the masses- I'm meditatin not kickin asses I'm a healer I feelher nota dealer or a wheeler i don't touch crack heroin or speed cause the only thin dat does ma consciousness right is 'WEED' rollinit up tokinit up takinit in when me lungs get filled i rest da bong on my 'Chin' if ya redi ta choke then lets begin my words all misty like smoke in ya face makin ya dizzy yer lost in outer space i'm new n i'm after first place flowin with grace n leavin no trace call me a rookie see if i care ya better beware cause i got the stare i'm yer nightmare,a double whammy blowin outya ears i'm all yer fears, a freak, a ghost in the night with second sight yer sweatin n i'm bettin dat in yer bed tonight you be wettin bring it on yer gon.....witda wind i begin blammin n slammin,shatterin glass n swearing yer not even sure what U B hearin so go ahead & ignore sit back n pass i know i've jus started but i'm kickin yer ass whas da matta cats got yer tongue you've just been hung I see all the dung that you've flung spittin n pissin....moanin n groanin the title i be ownin I'm outa my cage,a free spirited lyrical mage so jus stay backstage while i clear the air with some sage a cosmic shaman ready to engage n enrage i'm the yoda of freestyle a jedi of beats i know yer scared cause yer hidin under yer sheets i'm usin the force, a warhorse off coarse words direct from tha source with no remorse i see ya takin notes off my discourse step back n take in some air cause i'm here Somebody Everybody Nobody Invisible invincible actual n factual a reality in yer face stingin like mace yer lost withouta trace, a disgrace to dis place heartpounding like a bass i'm real-no deal-i'm here to steal numba 1 without a gun my voice the weapon my words the ammo like a flammin arrow-cuttin to yer marrow step down.. kiss the ground... where i stand/creator my right hand you've been canned n scanned by my poetical backhand a verbal slap leavin no gap time to take yer nap while I backtrack n let yall know I'm the Minister of Rap cyberspaciousness is dis place of bliss i infiltrated yer consciousness with spiraling snakes that hiss can't believe yer goin out like this I'm here for the challenge friend takin it to the end bettin i'll be da next trend parallel universes criss crossing yer world I've unfirled---your brain is all curled a matrix of memories of heaven on earth whats it worth-----remember yer birth yer here--for the change-rearrange-all wierd n strange mutatin n transformatin /meditatin n creatin you gotta a soul/yer whole /love is da goal....ya know let's go i'll flow n glow stoppin da show you don't even know whatcha know so let's go... a spiritual bein you be seein not a human doin who's spewing n chewin you up n spittin you out without a doubt as you pout electrifyin the air as you stare into the atmosphere i'm here/yer where that's right/yer full a fear Ed aka s.e.n.~Da Minister |
c'mon somebody anybody everybody
is there anyone here who cares ta help another freestyler improve on their skillz... peace |
Uppin for sum critique...........
also how does everyone count the barz---how many would you say this was? help....... |
Feed me wit sum FeedBack
let me know is it OK or whack where do I need improvin--- Hungry 4 da Wisdom thanks |
nice and long, lot of big words (don't like that) but flowed prety well, i really enjoyed reading it lol Weed is good lol some of your lines were very well put together like that check mine tho its some bullshit i made up durning school!
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=50746 mine is @ the bottome Check out dire_1 battles! |
your shit was tight,u got good word play u just need to learn how to blend them together better,it was over all tight,u got well over 40 bars by the way
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it was good.but the first bi made ma hjead spin lol to many Ms.........but it was tight....keep spttin yall get better ;) even the best still learn
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thanks all----good ta hear pos feedback--
my first battle sucked---came off weak---- check out my many posts and gimme yer honest opinion----I have a hard time with the punches---i guess since my fav form of music is the conscious hip hop-trance--takin ya higher kinda stuff--Arrested Development/Speech---Common---Digable Planet- PM Dawn--------------- guess ther really isn't a form a peaceful battlin--wher yer just out spittin insteada diss'in------or maybe ther is---let me know thanks peace |
I forgot ta put the tag for that first Battle---from what many have said so far I don't even know if I should be gettin people ta see it----burn it
MystiQuest vs sen http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...15&pagenumber=1 |
Uppin 4 some more feed back---really helps ta hear what everyone thinks-----inspiring 4 the Enquiring
thanks all as 4 battling --not sure if I got what it takes--- |
OK this is what I do think of a concept or message and try to give across that message being creative not just going out and saying it this piece really didnt have a message more along the line's of rhyme..I would say just try to stay on one topic and be creative some time's less is better hence all the word's that rhyme your structure is set up more of a poetry type verse line length is important try not to make them all uneven try to keepa certain length good luck..
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ask & you shall receive..........
feed back ------opinion----------------perspective--------------- any advise on how to improve appreciated so many talented souls........ peace Thanx 4 everything |
good wordplay, aight flow, nice drop overall, could have been better had yeah had more heart in it... nice overall though return the favor?
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uppin 4 more feedback
spectrum of consciousness waves of existence A journey beyond 'FlatLand' thanx peace |
thanx 2 everyone who has checked this out--appreciate the feed back
after seein so many others stuff---i see how much further i need to improve-----so much skill out there-- peace |
Ohhh k kid, you got some good vocab, good flow but fo real, don't just write shit about like self-glorification, try and get on a subject for real and really put thought into it, you're just learnin but yeah you will elevate, stick around, stay up and you''ll get better kid....
............Pz............. |
Thanx 4 Everything, I have no complaints whatsoever
Learnin everyminute..... peace |
drop the vocab. work on flow.... your on the right track kid. practice makes perfect. wunn~
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oh yeh lemme speak soem wisdom to you. outside of this internet rap b.s. the world dont give a fuck about vocab. net-cees just spit vocab ridiculous and where has that gotten any net kids? u see any of em signin deals? naw.
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^^be right,vocab isnt important honestly,it is,but not as much as you would expect...dont need a great deal of emphasis on big words and such,it just dont need it....but i liekd htis...you ahve to work on flow..the flow was out a lil,other then that..ermm.i liked th emulties assualt at the beginning...that was nice,then the rest of the song,was spaced out strangly,couldnt pick it up,but eh,who cars,its only words...this was pretty good,but definete room for improvement in the flow-bar lenght placement type of thing,self glorifaction like mead mentioend,wont get you nowhere,try stay on topic,it wa s good verse but you need to keep on,if you seem to be loosing the topic,just stop...nice spit...but ease the vocab back a bit,sounds forced nahmean....if its fromth ehart and has a meaning and emotion too it,no amount of big words wll make it any better then small ones...
thankyou for posting in my new verse,im glad you liked it.. keep spitting.. bismillah |
uppin 4 more advise---
gotta battle comin up---i'm weak with the punches--- my first battle sucked---pretty much got slammed-- havin a hard time lettin go a the spiritual flow workin on the punches any insight apprecaited thanx |
on a battle type tip... read up onr ur opponent. and then think of some clever shit to go with it. dont force it. cuz u usually got a week or so to drop ur verse.
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thanx 4 the tip-------
the journey continues ta be able ta just flow with the punches-----aspiring ta be like the masters genius minds abide in this here place----- wish ther was a compilation of all the best here--- yall should be gettin paid--- we should all have it made plantin seeds n fulfillin r needs food/clothing/shelta n love the knowledge that Gods Omnipotent not just above so pick up yo brother insteada shove paradise is what i'm thinkin of... peace thanx all uppin---- |
nice sen, very nice, i liked it , holla La Familia
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uppin 4 some more tips----what punches seem ta hit the hardest---what knocks yer opponent down so they can't get up--
tryin hard ta be mean----I'm to use ta gettin high n bein chill, yet I'm up 4 the challenge--- peace thanx all |
hey sen if u drop me a link of ur new song ill judge it too im working on one right now
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uppin 4 more a yall words a wisdom---
appreciate your knowledge n know how peace thanX |
it was a good piece, it had its ups and downs, you should try to stay more consistent, and usin large words in your verses doesnt really inhance tha piece if no one undastands what you are talkin about, put away tha dictionary and use your own diction. Nice post though, not tryin to be critical or anythin, just speakin my mind, peace, 1 luv
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uppin--4 more critiques
thanX 4 the peeps peace |
Uppin again---
on yall i depend until the end enemy or friend feedback do send A hip hop revolution trend spiritual evolution around the next bend peace |
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