~There'll Never Be Another Me~
 

some shit i wrote ...............yo
wanna share it wit ya'll


There'll never be another me
Promises broken, chances blown
Bitter tears and feelings thrown
Phony smiles and broken hearts,
Something's tearing us apart
I can't leave, but I can't stay
And I can't believe these games we play
What is it that we did wrong?
Because all the happiness is gone
Before you turn to walk away,
And say those things I know you'll say
Take one good look at what you see
There'll never be another me
Quiet stares and empty words
A cry for love that goes unheard
Painful silence, angry eyes
Emotions that can't be disguised
The laughs and smiles have disappeared
There's no doubt something's missing here
Things are changing, by and by
In ways we can't ask how or why
Confusion's hitting more and more
What exactly are we looking for?
Before you leave and don't come back,
Before you run to where someone else is at
Take one good look at what you see
because there'll never be another me


HOLLA wit Critism.............yo

aww thas really good....that was really sad tho...but itz was nice...

very deep and i felt
wat u was sayiin...
i mean cuz there will
never be anybody like
'you'( meaning everybody in
general)..very nice piece tho..pz

^^^^^^^^^^^^Thanks for the feedback Chyna N Dezire.......i apreciate it................


UPPUN

Deep fam.........that was some good ish

Emotion's i like tht in a piece

keep it goin

-one love-

nice m'n--liked the verse a lot--short an full of emotion--nice m'n--much luv---peace

Thanks For the Feedbacks i apreciate it yo.........................

UPPUN

YO dat shit was tight....Man I can relate...

Werd^^i can relate to most of that...definitly feeling it, tyte drop

Hmmmmmmm, I liked this one a lot........

I was gonna put my favorite line but I really like the whole thing.

It was nicely done......keep spittin'

^^^^^^^^^^Thanks i apreciate the comments and feedbacks....yo.......this would be in the RB LEGENDS...lol but i cant nominate it myself

damn, that's like an expression of my feelings...keep droppin, all your poems are read so far are tight.

Re: ~There'll Never Be Another Me~
 

the feeling of these mighty words just hit me straight to the face...
that opening line "there'll never be another me" is damn good cuz of the fact that its extremely true...its you from the start til the end



questions that would always be asked whenever things are getting mess up...the contradictory of the line "i cant stay , but i cant leave" held this part strong enough to even stand out in the whole poem..props



damn!...i read that out loud and just how i said it made me weak and sad....cuz those moments ya know like when ur about to leave and while ur walking away ur scared to turned around cuz ur heart might tell ur feet to go back...."there'll never be another me"..thats always been a good line..my fave...nice!



like i said...that moment when its just you and her .... the feeling just mixed up with anger and happiness that would all sum up to pain....



the pain, arrgh!...i liked this!



this sums it up...all those thoughts for just one question for you to find the answer to...much emotion



finally...the ending...*sigh* just sooo emotional.....ahhhhhhh my fave line " There'll never be another me"

over all nice man....its funny cuz i mostly have critism to much of the poems here ..hehehe u got lucky im in a cheesy mood...nahhh..nice poem

^^^^^^^^^^^LOOOL Thanks Shiz.......and Starks i apreciate it.................Once again i repeat...lol




^^^^Who Agree's..lol

well if ma boo think he should be an RB legend why not!

^^^^^^^^^^WELL DO IT..lol

Yo uppun on this thanx for the feedback boo

It's a nice little poem.....

kind of seen as an attempt to spark a second thought in the person's mind before walking out......

All i can say is, very well written. I mean all round. I didn't see any flaws in it. NOne that are apparent anyway.. And of course, emotions were depicted in a powerful yet controlled manner.

But please, NEVER, nominate yourself for RB Legends. Cos like when people write stuff, and they are so content and happy with it. Like they've got it all onto paper. You're going to really pumped n what not...and nominate stuff that is good, even great. But not necessarily Legends material...(something along those lines..but yeah, that's the RB reason..)...

This is the 'artistic' reason. Its the kind of feeling that shouldn't conflict with being put up in some 'hall of fame' or whatever. It should be as it is. For what it is...ya dig?




Though i guess, this is probably one that should be in there. For a certain amount of originality, and it was so well written. I'll give it a partal reccomendation.

real powerful shit dawg. respect

Varen and the rest i understand Yo thnx for peepin it givin me yo feedbacks thnx anyhow

shit was tight and was like raw emotion. U know i like both of yo poems ive read so far, but i have a suggestion, u can ignore it if u want, but i have found that writing freeverse where it doesnt rhyme can really catch hold of peoples mind and put the peace in a more serious mood. just a suggestion, oh u can make parts of it rhyme too but leave some where it doesnt rhyme, this makes it seem really original and it will stand out more. keep up the tight ish fam, peace