jokes.............................
 

aight a man walks in a gay club to get a drink cause he's very thirsty

well he goes to the bartender and ask for a club soda so the bartender says you can only get drinks if ya have a name for ya dick so the dude says what do you mean so the bartender calls a regular over and he tells the man that his dicks name is m&m's cause it melts in ya mouth not in ya hand then his friend comes over and says his dicks name is oscar cause its huge as a suasage

so the man says well my dicks name is secrate cause its strong enuff for a man but made for a women

then leaves outta the bar screamin flammer's


lol


anyways yall got some funny's

I Have Some Jokes For You

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...&threadid=51269

~1~

blah blah blah just tryna have some fun

so the man says well my dicks name is secrate cause its strong enuff for a man but made for a women

^^^^i said that.............that was me!!!!!!!!!!!!

what you mean you made up the joke well maybe ya did i heard the shit from some dike

ur so stupid....

u made this damn thread!!!

nah im fuckin around that shits funny as fuck

i was the man i the bar......based on a tru story

**morphs into a 14 year old schoolboy**

you walked into a gay bar? ewwwwwww! homo! homo!

lmao, j/k.

lol

That shit was off uh BET Comic View, I forgot the comedian tho....

and I'm pretty sure it's 'secret' pal..........

A blonde and a gay man have to catch an airplane for an important meeting. Which one gets there first?







The faggot because he already has his shit packed.

thats a good one................^^^^^^^^^^^^

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lol @ Muthugga

So Jesus walks into a hotel, throws some nails on the counter and says "can you put me up for the night."

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch".

Bruklor = King of Comedy

Yes Yes, Thank You Thank You.

Mushroom walks into a bar. Bartender says "We don't serve your type here". The Mushroom replies "Why not? I'm a fun guy".

LMAO @ that

That was the stupidest thing ever. . but it actually made me laugh. LOL. Or maybe it's all that crack I smoked earlier.

rotflmaof thats funny ^^

Quot AxL, :D You know I'm a regular Jim Carrey.

And yeah kgm that was pretty funny, it made me laugh.

just read your ish lol took a min to comprehend yanno the bud fucks wit ya some times but lol **ouch**

hey tell me some more keep me entertained

Alright so there is a group of people and they are pelting this whore with rocks, so Jesus walks up and says "Please people let he who be without sin cast the first stone." Sure enough a rock comes flying through the air, and he turns around and says "mother you really piss me off."

lmaof where do you get these jesus jokes from lol

What did BabyCorn say to MamaCorn?

"Where's PapaCorn"

MamaCorn answered;
"Pobing the Unicorn"

lmao

wish i could tell funny jokes and be popular like you guys :(


whats a unicorn ?

What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..."
A southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."

Why is there no Disneyland in China?
No one's tall enough to go on the good rides

haha i love it

lmao gotdamn thats some funny shit you the new rb comedy i official deem you lmao

My girlfriend and I were getting married.
There was only one thing bothering me, and that was
the Bride's Maid. She was a very beautiful and sexy
woman. She sometimes flirted me, and it made me feel uncomfortable.
One day, she called me and asked me to come over to
check the invitations.
So I went. She was home alone, and when I arrived she
whispered into my ear that she wanted to make love to
me before I married her best friend.
I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word.
So she said, "I'll go upstairs to the bedroom, if
you're up for it, just come and get me."
I stood there for a moment, and then turned around and
went to the front door... I opened it and stepped
outside.
There was my Bride-to-be with tears in her eyes, she
hugged me and said, "I'm so happy, you have passed my
test. I couldn't have asked for a better man to marry."
Lesson learned: Always keep your condoms in the car.

What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants. The bar tender says, "Sir, do you realize you have a steering wheel on your pants?"

The pirate says, "Ay, and it's driving me nuts."

there a banana a penis and a salad

the banana says I have the worst life they peel my skin off and eat me

the salad said no I have the worst life they toss me up and cut me

and the penis said (laughing) 'is ganna kill ya' the penis said (Laughing) the penis goes..........................................HEY wait what did the penis say

lmao funny stuff

Word^^^ Also something to live by.

i dont get it :(

Sigh,

The Penis said, "My life is the worst. My master puts a bag over my head and forces me to do push-ups until I puke."

Ok, so this guy is hitchhiking and has been waiting for quite a while. Finally a trucker stops and picks him, and when the guy gets in he notices that the trucker has a monkey sitting on the dashboard, but the guy doesn't say anything. After a while his curiosity gets the best of him, and he asks about the monkey. The trucker chuckles and says watch this, then he smacks the monkey in the head, and it jumps down unzips his fly, and starts giving him a blowjob, after he is done the monkey wipes hip off, zips up his pants and gets back on the dashboard. The hitchhiker says wow! that was great, and the trucker responds, do you want to give it a try? The Hitchhiker say, "I guess so, but you dont have to hit me so hard."

Jesus, in a very worried state, convened all of his apostles
and disciples to an emergency meeting because of the high drug
consumption problem all over the earth.
After giving it much thought they reached the conclusion that
in order to better deal with the problem, that they should try
the drugs themselves and then decide on the correct way to
proceed. It was therefore decided that a commission made up of
some of the members return to earth to get the different types
of drugs.
The secret operation is effected and two days later the
commissioned disciples begin to return to heaven. Jesus,
waiting at the door, lets in the first disciple:
"Who is it?"
"It's Paul"
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring Paul?"
"Hashish from Morocco"
"Very well son, come in."
"Who is it?"
"It's Mark"
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring Mark?"
"Marijuana from Colombia"
"Very well son, come in."
"Who is it?"
"It's Matthew"
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring Matthew ?"
"Cocaine from Bolivia"
"Very well son, come in."
"Who is it?"
"It's John"
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring John ?"
"Crack from New York"
"Very well son, come in."
"Who is it?"
It's Luke"
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring Luke ?"
"Speed from Amsterdam"
"Very well son, come in."
"Who is it?"
"It's Judas"
Jesus opens the door.
"What did you bring Judas ?"
"The FBI, YOU MOTHER FUCKERS! EVERYONE AGAINST THE WALL!"