Pick Up Lines
 

Pick-Up lines are funny as fuck, not that you'd ever use em, but still always funny to have em to use on a fat ugly bitch at a party, then when she thinks you like her, step on her feelings and make her realise she is as fat and ugly as everyone says she is.

Sorry if these threads are played, but haven't seen one since i've been here

Anyway get postin your favourite/funniest/cheezy pick-up lines


* If you were a dog i'd sure give you my bone*

*Was your dad a farmer, well he sure grew some nice melons*

*Was your dad a baker, cause he sure produced some nice muffs*

My FAV.

Say theres 2 gurls at a party, ones ugly and ones prti hot, go up to the ugly one n say " Would you like to dance?", then of course she'll say " Yes!" cause shes so pathetic, then go " Well get ya ugly ass out there so i can sit and talk to your friend"

Your legs are like shops, what time do they open.

^^I like that chat up line but I stay away from the fat chicks

Your both still virgins then...

...Fucka cheesey chat up line...

^^I aint a virgin....I've never used that chat up line, I just laughed when I heard somebody say it

And denial kicks in...

"if I told you, you had a beautiful body... would you hold it against me ?"

^lol

Wow another alias.......

"do you like pokemon cuz i would sure like to pikachu (peek at you)"

"Hey, I lost my number.. Can I have yours?"

"I lost my teddy bear.. Will you sleep with me?"

:thumbup:

i only know extremely corny ones:

"Your father must be a terrorist.... cause you the bomb!!"
"Are your feet tired... you've been running threw my mind all day"

& this one always works

"Let's Fuck"

Twizzle is jus depressed coz he never has fun....

*Did it hurt?? when you fell from Heaven*

*i run up to the girl and smash an ice-cube on her forehead......after that i say"now the ice is broken, du wanna cum bk to mine??"

*Your dads a thief!! coz he stole the stars from the skies and put'em in your eyes*

*you must be good at putting scaffoldings up!! you just got me erected*

*get your coat you've pulled*

"wanna fuck?"

lol

***Warning***
If you actually use any of these lines, I guarantee you will die a lonely, pathetic virgin.


If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

I lost my number, can I borrow yours.

The word is legs. What do you say we leave and go spread the word?

Do you wash your pants in Windex? 'Cause I can see myself in them.

Are those space pants? 'Cause your ass is outta this world.

Excuse me, miss, but are you an artist? 'Cause you're drawing my attention.

If your right leg is Christmas and your left is New Years, can I spread the Holiday cheer?

This isn't a line, but it'll work...

As long as you have a cool sounding title...

And the bitch works in your office building.

Simply slide your business card into her driver's side window...

You know, in between the rubber and glass down at the bottom of the window.

And leave a one word message...

Lunch?

I guarantee, you'll get a callback.

Unless of course your title reads: Janitor

Or something equally herbish.

"do u wash ur pants in windex?.. cuz i can see myself in them"

"wanna play army?.. ill lay down and u blow the crap outta me.."

hahaha

Dope!

"aint no fun if the homies cant have none"

"are u easy?"

"todays word of the day is Legs. Lets go home and spread the word"

"Ur dad must be a baker cuz u got nice buns"
" Ur dad must be a pitcher cuz u got nice curves"
"Hey babe, i wanna use your thighs as ear muffs!"
"Hey baby, wanna play lion? OK. You go kneel right there and I'll throw you my meat."
"If I told you I had a 2 inch dick would you fuck me? (if she says no) say Good, because mine is 8 inches. "

Baby u may not be the best lookin....But Beauties only a Light switch away :thumbup:
Im Not the Hottest here..but im the Only one Talkin to you

If I Flipped a Coin.. what do think my Chances r of Gettin Head?

Wow! Are those real?

Excuse me, want to dance? if she says No. then say
Maybe you didn't hear me ... I said you look really fat in those pants!

there are a lot of fish in the sea, but you're the only one I'd like to catch and mount back at my place.

Excuse me, miss, do you give head to strangers? No. Well, then, allow me to introduce myself.

Girl i wanna Spread your Legs and Eat my way to your Heart

:slick:

Here, I'ma make one up off the top of my head...here goes...

I thought I seen the light to heaven, because your my angel!!!

^^^Ahha!!!

Or...

Wow, I think I got a sun burn just lookin' at you, because you so hott!!!

I think the second one is pretty good. Still ehh. Ahha.

So true I do it all the time, never eat alone either. I thought I was the only one rocking the business card in the window gimmick... Dopeness for sure, and my tittle gets them all warm and fuzzy feeling.

Here, I made this one up...

If a girl pisses you off say...

Jeeze, are you missin' 3 other feet, because I only see one camel toe.

^^^Ahha!!! That will get her embarrased and lookin' down.

i've been the receipient of a few cheesy lines, but this one is actually witty and creative...

"that outfit is becoming on you... and if i were that outfit, i'd be coming on you too."

i guess i find subtle carnal tendencies, flattering...

**cracks knuckles**

o-----------------kay... chat up lines

**grab arse** is this seat taken?

want to come back to mine for a shag and a pizza? what? you dont like pizza?

are those puppies for sale? can i have the one with the pink nose?

**they walk past, follow and say** "so where are we going?"

and of course my all time favourite:







































"scream and i'll stab you"

i say this all the time

"lets sex"

look into the girls eyes, and say...
"can i have the key to ur heart, because i got lost in ur eyes"

and the greatest one ever

"excuse me, but is ur father a meat burgaler? cuz it looks like he took two fine pieces of ham and stuck them down the back of ur pants"

Best one of all...

"Is there a keg is your pants, because I wanna tap that ass." Ahha!!!

BLAHAHAHAHAHA

Oh shit, should she be like :help:

best pick up lines.... um...
Wanna study math tonite? we can add ya bed, subtract our clothes, divide ya legs, and MULTIPLY.....

and then theres the bets one of all time....
did you live on a farm cauz u sure no how to raISE A COCK

^those are awful

what you need to do is go up to a girl and say

DAYMN Girl, now THOSE are some child-bearing hips

LOL i see some nice lines hear

but ya'll know 70 percent of the time pick up lines don't work right

lol @ BTK's lines.

Lmao at Bugz Bunny's ..

.. but yeah, i dont really have any certain 'pick up' lines, just tell her she look good. Simple. Just walk over and find something she's wearing etc and try to go off that like .. oooh, yeah i get some of my stuff from there to .. you know richie? blah blah .. just idol chatter like that. Make conversation. I hate chicks that get scared to even talk .. haha ..

*christmas time*
gimme a christmas kiss

"If your right leg were xmas and your left leg were new years, could i visit you between the holidays?"
1luv.

hi ur sexy.suck my dick.or i'll give you an std

or do a kobe.
just rape her
no words involved

^The strong silent type....