..~Broke Up~.. Saaran and Lady
 

First off, this is missing a chorus.. Limited Edition help mix this track.. it's unfinished and i have a cold so dun comment on how it sounds i lost breath or w/e.. i'mma load the final draft of this on my new soundclick.. but here's this one for y'all (the draft)..

www.soundclick.com/ladyfiya

click music, then click the top song, ~Broke Up~... Saaran been did his verse, props nigga.. :thumbup:

my lyrics:
Constant fights, more drops than flights, realize who sleep on the couch @ night
Disposing open Trojans, exposing ya darkness to my light
My colder shoulder, I’m holding something u can LIE on
This bygone wanna see me tired? Put ya LaZ-I-ON
Like Jewish religion, I’m drifting my feelings, summin the difference love isn’t a competition
U must be meeting the crack half yo ass is listening
No mo’ forgiving mistakes, sweet talk @ stake replacing cavaties
Miscarried tragedies... now boo you think you having me
Stood me up gradually, but I never forced u on either knee
Uneasy phase, mo days not sayin the phrase “Puedes hacerlo por mi?”
Low scored you bored the bed, even if it gave you innuendo
Throwback yo Game Boy, yo clothes and Nintendo leaving this window
Relations? Shit I defended dependent relationships
Decision to sail-out, u might find out what you dealing with
Come and catch my drift, it’s the same just without a kiss
Like ice cups in abyss, shit in change, I’m still tuff bitch


>>I left feed on a hella amount of people in the songs portion.. but i'll edit it if i need to..<<

yo i cant listen now

becuase soundclick is a bitch...lol

but i read your shit...and its pretty dope filled with multies


i will post more feedback when im able to listen..
nice shit yo....

this is dope....saraan could have done alil better...

i would like to be on this track..maybe the chorus

lady...you aint spitten on beat...but its coo
it be dope...lol

i like how you spit fast.......

lady you can raise your vocals....alot...and shit liek that....

but yo get at me for that chorus and i will spit a verse or somehthing....get at me ma

first cat wasn't bad overall nice shit... hmm Its a little too obvious that he took more then one take... and if he din't then he must of silenced taking his breath or something... but anyways nice looks pretty good lyrics


beat is tight aswell

Lady Fiya... yeah you need to up your breath-control so do try recording without a cold ;) the spitting was nice you got some potential, try spitting a lil more clear, more on beat... and if you can cop some better quality

good looks for both yall

peace

1


return tha favor: http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=177309

quality is pretty good for both
sarran was ok, lyrics nothing special
lady fiya seemed off flow to me, idk if mixing problem or w/e, just seemed ahead of the beat a lil

beat was ight, i wanna hear it when it done wif chorus and shii holla
1

yeah i agree wit 20 evathang just seem a lil off track but the beat & overall quality was good tho also vote on my battles & i'll return the favor

yea i already kno how to control my breaths.. i just need to record it over.. my cold tryna go away finally..! YAY.. i'll post the new one soon.. :thumbup: thanx fa the feedback kiddies.. :)

aight beat i fucks with it...sitting here flowing to it...
1st...flow was aight...delivery was ok...i think it could have been upped a lil...lyrics were pretty good...

2nd...aight you need to work on ya flow a bit the part you got fast at is how i was rapping to the beat but i think you gotta learn how to ride it a bit better yamean...delivery need work...dont sound too comfortable on the mic...do you memorize your lyrics or read them of the paper? quality needs to be upped...but i told you i'mma help you out with that when you get on AIM...i think you got potential just gotta work on some things...

overall this was a decent track. peace

return the feedback
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=177734

aiight the beat is ill man... the first verse was good.... not really that bad..... the second one was kinda low... needs to speak up more.... and she fell off times to times... but it was alrigh... decent track... even tho its unfinished... i could see it more doper.....word....

Beat sounds nice.. Classy type shit, I like that. First verse, saaran, he always comes fairly nice on tracks. I think hed benefit from deepening his voice a lil.. But it still sounded good to me.

Lady fiya -- This is the first time I heard you on a mic; shit sounded cool. What you need to do is raise your vocals a few decibles and play with your EQ settings on the multitrack display to put a tiny bit more bass in your voice so it comes out clearer. You had good flow and everything though so I enjoyed this track.

I cant say it was 100% my style with the slow romantic type subject matter.. But it wasnt a bad listen.

Check out my new track that should be near the top of the songs forum if you can.. Thanks.. :thumbup:

I like the beat, the concept, if ya'll gone do a remix, get at me i think id sound nice with Lady, your the first femcee I heard on RV i am new though but listening to everyones drops so when i drop mines I can measure up. Keep dropping and hope you do more soon, and dam finish them songs lol aight 1
Keyz.....coming soon...

Beat was nice.... chorus was ok... the first nigga was ok...but his verse was ok.. and he got good flow...

You came ut good.. but i could barely understand you... ya flow was nice... but thats it

Imma peep this later ma but fuck soundclick get a Rideinconline account


www.rideinconline.com its alot better .

this beat is nasty as shit...aight first person not really feelin the voice nahmean flow could have been smoother sharper....umm delivery needs work emotion as well....lines are str8......


aight damn i could flow where the hooks suppose 2 be.....



aight breath control need work...lyrics are really good flow is better then the first cats..u need work wit your delivery emotion word clarity....umm all in all both of u need work on the listed above..props on work keep elevating

pretty good sarrans flow was off in a few spots is voice is different lol
ladyfiya seems like ur flow migh have been off a little nice voicei think ur stuff could have been turned up a little bit multies were good turn up ur lyrics though hard for me to hear some of it
i like the beat