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Ennui (0-0) vs Malicious (0-0)
Topics
The Hand that Helped me Fall Only For the Righteous Tears of the Dead Just a dream... The Shadow Behind Me The Last Mile Circle of Time Sentenced to Love Blooded Placement As the Dawn Fades Through the Glass Of Hate and Love My Sirens Mourn Farewell... The Blade that wouldn't Cut A River Called Life ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Check ins due by Tuesday Verses Due by Thursday Voting Ends Saturday Minumum of 16 lines You can now do your own topic, instead of doing the same one. If you are unsure of the rules click here Good luck and drop dope |
Checkin in...
Is this audio or text..? Appo: This is topical text mate Lucky : He wanted an Audio Battle Bro...Look at the Audio Sign Up Close this battle...and put Mal against someone else... |
I wanted to do both.
-_- Appo: You can do both, just make sure you drop a verse in this battle. Good luck |
Im up in here, who am i battlin? are you gunna battle or what Ennui
Appo: Yeah he will, if not you can face Tony Brown so drop anyway. |
I listen to The Tears of the dead.
As i walk my dark path in a gloomy state of mind While taking a trip down memory lane of bad things i've done As i pray for gods forgiveness and keep all horrific things behind but of all worrys is not god or the law for which is upheld tight or thoughts of burning in the flamming pits it is of past elders who struggled to raise me right I knew i was a demon as i decieved my grandmother with high hopes for my future...who was I to stop her her only wishes were to see my great accomplishments and milestones reached that she set out for me to conquer I never planned this lifestyle it was more like destiny seems like it was fate......... because this lifestyle naturally came to me But im ashamed of this walk and have high hopes to see the light As i try to straighten my path...it seems like i cant get ahead And now everyday as i walk this cruel world of sin no matter the level of noise i hear the sniffles from the tears of the dead Now walking a christian life after i concieve a wonderful son They say the good die quick.... i turned holy and died under the light of gods son As i watch down on my son begining to follow my path which is ahead i realise it was'nt my grandmother........ i was crying and heard my own tears since i am now dead |
I paddle the canoe down the river of life...
...The side to the left...dark...the right so full of light... Where to board..? Where do I dock my veselled soul..? ...One half is a sandy beach...the other an infested hole... I reach rocky rapids...steep decent, a taunting pace... ...I now find myself in a dash on a track I never wanted to race... I turn my head back, to try and seek some kinda rescue... ...All's I hear is a voice..."It's your fault everyone has left you..." All of a sudden the dark side of the shore comes nearer... ...I look down...beer and weed on the left...it comes clearer... On the right side of the boat's floor a...it's a picture... ...My family...my girlfriend...it looks so bright compared to the liquor... I shake my head, and crack a brew...I take a sip of it... ...The dark side of the shore comes zooming...I'm within an inch of it... As I drink the beer and light a joint...I hear the voice once again... ..."Is it worth to piss your life away, in turn losing Jenn..?" I stop and look...I'm riding in the black sand of the darkness... ...I look to the light shore...many memories that could never depart us... I look down to the beer and weed...think of Jenn and my family... ...I've stopped on the black sand...the very sand that damaged me... I tried to push off into the river but the boat was weighed down... ...I threw the beer and weed off and they shattered on banked ground... With every amount of strength, I pushed the boat further... ...The very motive was if Jenn found out, how much it would hurt her... The boat hit the waves, and I floated down and safely away... ...It was my own fault that everybody hated me today.... I reach the other shore for a new start, a new life in the bliss... ...I then realized how much I had really actually come to miss... Happiness was in me...I was in the light to get my memories back... ...From time to time I looked to darkness........and how I wished to go back... It's long...but oh well. If you don't understand it, it represents one's struggle with drugs and alcohol over family and love. |
Mal- It seemed as if you just keyed that up, really didn't try...Was actually quite taken back by it, and not in a good way. It seemed as if you slipped into redundancy, kept saying the same thing...The vocabulary could have been a bit better, and the wording was a bit off...You did have a good take on the topic though...also, work on your form, it was hard for me to get into the piece. I honestly didn't enjoy it that much..
Ennui- I loved the symbolism in this peace...It started out great, really got me into the piece..Your writing style was pretty unique, i personally liked it..Your wording lacked a bit, but you made up for that with great usage of metaphors and vocabulary...Your take on the topic was great, though...I never really thought of going down a "River of Life"....A really enjoyable piece, will keep reading your stuff.. -V- Ennui |
great battle, bothe were written very well..... this was very close and a real hard decisions. I guess it all comes down to which one exerted more feelin and gave u a sense of passion. Its hard for me to say this with confidence, because bothe of them had different styles and I don't want to jus pick the style I liked best. But I will have to go wit E, for his use of symbolism and his flow was a lil more consistant.... Malicious was on point, was basically to the point and didn't leave as much to the imagination as E's did. great wurk to the bothe of ya and look foward to readin more......
winner- Ennui |
Ennui wins 2-0
Ennui (1-0) Malicious (0-1) |
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