RapVerse.com Community

RapVerse.com Community (http://community.rapverse.com/index.php)
-   Front Lines Battles (http://community.rapverse.com/forumdisplay.php?f=63)
-   -   White Craca vs fine mind (http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=124574)

lyrical distruction 05-16-04 12:11 PM

White Craca vs fine mind
 
10 lines
1 post
no crew votes
check in

lyrical distruction 05-16-04 12:29 PM

ayo this fuckers gonna get demolished, like popa doc in 8 mile/
this bitch was nothing im makin dis worth your while, no need to be in denial
i shoulda grabbed and stabbed you at birth, when you were im your muthas woom/
your like one big baloon, im here to deflate the baloon, stick a pin in it watch it fly/
dieing is the only thing your good at, so im gonna make dis real quick, snapp your neck off/
switch your power lights off like an electric bolt hit you/
flew into you landing you into a trash can when colideing into it in mid air/
i'll pick you up sideways throw you into a dark room, throw away the key/
darkness gives you frights, scareing you when pretending i was a pultaguist/
your not even 10 brain waves from me, couldn't measure brain waves from me, they'll zap you b4 like lazer beams attacking/
the flows come back n stack on you like a stack of draws, lift you away from me crushin you/

White Craca 05-16-04 04:43 PM

let me do some stuff ill spit by tonight

-bODy CoUnT- 05-16-04 04:50 PM

Ay fine mind wassup are you gonna spit in our battle homey... If so its set up jus come and spit homey...1

White Craca 05-16-04 05:48 PM

checkin in

White Craca 05-16-04 06:09 PM

check this

they call u fine mind but u just a deciete/
my punches knock u out and ya face hits the concrete/
u shoulda erased yo verse cuz it cant compete/
dont think ur gonna reimburse this shit cuz u cant take this heat/
i transmit a deadly flow to ya brain making ya retreat/
ur beat blows like hos and ur too high to care from the fuckin cocaine/
u need to stop trying cause the shit u smoke makes u go mentally insane/
i strangle u by the neck with a chain and make ya choke/
u started this shit and u provoked me to attack and i just kicked ass.....

lol lets get the votes flowin baby

White Craca 05-16-04 07:51 PM

uppin for votes come on ppl ill return the fava just set the link

White Craca 05-16-04 10:47 PM

:laugh2: :laugh2: :laugh2: :laugh2: uppin come on people actually vote

White Craca 05-17-04 06:20 PM

uppin.. come on damn :thefinger :thefinger lets get this shit cracking so it can be ova

boaty 05-17-04 06:27 PM

Imma go with craca on this one. I thought he had the better flow

Vote disqualified for inadequate feedback. Please see this thread if you need help on what qualifies as an acceptable explanation.

Know-Gimix 05-17-04 06:33 PM

ayo this fuckers gonna get demolished, like popa doc in 8 mile/
this bitch was nothing im makin dis worth your while, no need to be in denial
weak opener- one similie- no metas, no punchlines, no wordplay, stretched
i shoulda grabbed and stabbed you at birth, when you were im your muthas woom/
your like one big baloon, im here to deflate the baloon, stick a pin in it watch it fly/
This is not good- try not to do this every again- the structure is correct but it doesn't rhyme correctly when flowed out loud, and same problems as the previous
dieing is the only thing your good at, so im gonna make dis real quick, snapp your neck off/
switch your power lights off like an electric bolt hit you/
flew into you landing you into a trash can when colideing into it in mid air/
i'll pick you up sideways throw you into a dark room, throw away the key/
arright see I dunno where this is sposed to rhyme, what happened to the structure, the punchlines are basic and not very good at all--- keep writing but look at some of the better writers on here and try and structure your rhymes better with easily defined punchlines that have some witt to em.
darkness gives you frights, scareing you when pretending i was a pultaguist/
your not even 10 brain waves from me, couldn't measure brain waves from me, they'll zap you b4 like lazer beams attacking/
the flows come back n stack on you like a stack of draws, lift you away from me crushin you/

Weak verse all in all... next

they call u fine mind but u just a deciete/
my punches knock u out and ya face hits the concrete/
This was kind of weak, the punch was basic but at least it flowed o.k
u shoulda erased yo verse cuz it cant compete/
dont think ur gonna reimburse this shit cuz u cant take this heat/
This bar doesn't make sense really-- it flows but its weak and it just takes up space
i transmit a deadly flow to ya brain making ya retreat/
ur beat blows like hos and ur too high to care from the fuckin cocaine/
u need to stop trying cause the shit u smoke makes u go mentally insane/
This is weak here... you abandoned your previous structure- the lines are basic and the punch doesn't hit very hard
i strangle u by the neck with a chain and make ya choke/
u started this shit and u provoked me to attack and i just kicked ass....
This again breaks in the structure you just changed to-- no real punchline, and basic wording.

All in all this was a weak battle, but White Craca definately has a better Idea of what he's trying to accomplish.... I think If you work on your punchlines- by giving them relevancy and work on keeping a solid flowing structure you will improve drastically White Craca.... Vote- White.
please return the favor... http://community.rapbattles.com/showthread.php?t=124761

Metaskriptz 05-17-04 06:38 PM

I have to go with white on this........His was nice and stabled
balance was good...Also with similies metaphores......
Both work on things though...fine mind to long ...Work on that
You passed the line limite.......but this does go to craca

Return the favor http://community.rapbattles.com/showthread.php?t=124400

White Craca 05-17-04 10:00 PM

uppin this shit come on i need 2 more votes or fine mind need 5 come on ppl lets go

XxToXiCXxVeRbZ 05-17-04 10:03 PM

Yo White Craca Got Dis// Becus Of Punches And Personals//

Fine Mind Work On Yo Punches U Gots To Hit Hard Next Time Fam//

White Craca Work On Yo Struture Man// But Nice Flowz And Personals

White Craca 05-18-04 06:52 AM

uppinn hit this up come on


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 12:27 AM.