From His Point of View
 

There’s only so many sorries a mind can take
before a person falls down, stumbles and breaks.
It isn’t worth all the pain I’ve had, all the things
I’ve went through just to get a piece that’s mad.
Can’t understand the other side, just wanting
to get on a good tide.
Wonder at night is this really worth it, then in
the day I confirm it.
Still the things I put up with are insane, slanders
and her wanting me to change.
Little by little, I succumb to the wishes, little
by little I stop throwing switches.
Stuck in love, but can’t find a way out, this
is my story of how one man can’t shout.
Slowly falling and increasing in speed, never
going to tell you the things I need.
Physically enjoyable but mentally unstable,
I tell myself I’m willing and capable, but
some days like today its just too much for me
to handle.

wow, really emotional......felt this....ur vocab needs ta up...and ur structure.....an easy way out to make ur structure look iight is just center it.....lol and this had good concept 7.5/10...not bad......holla at my o/ms in tha sig

thanks man, uppin this

http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post2402210 my link, and UpPiN

this was good, but purely fiction, lol, emotion was good, flow was very good, structure is getting better, keep it up