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Liquor Of Tears Vs. Re$tricted
.::Rules::. 20-30 Lines Max 5 Votez Winz No Crew No Hate No D/R Checks Due By 7/8/04 Spits Due By 7/10/04 Votes Due By 7/13/04 Topic: My Responsibility Good Luck To LOT! ~R~ |
::.::Ch-Check::.:: ~R~ |
check...
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'Ok, Confirmation on our move out to our destination
Keep your eyes peeled, you dont know what evil can hide his face in' As he exits the vehicle, and make sure the ear piece is tightly in place He fixes his sunglasses and makes sure his tie is adjacent to his face Patting the holster on his side, and catching his partner in the eye He opens the door and stands up, a crowd of strangers Head on a swivel, keepin his eye out for dangers He makes sure every move is sequential, no pause in between Because every move is consequential, in sync with his team His hand reaches into the car and motions him out The man signals an ok with a nod, not opening his mouth Hes in a blue suit, red tie, and pokes his head out of the car Crowd goes ecstatic, with cheers so loud they echo to Mars Cameras flashing, Microphones pushed to his direction But the man in the glasses pushes them to their own section The crowd is still potent with the arrival of their leader With signs and screams, the mood starts to teeter In a blink of an eye, You hear nothing from their mouths As the man in the glasses turns sharply around 1...2...3 shots, the moment turns to slow motion His instict pulls him to the floor, but in his heart he knows it He stands up and darts towards his boss, pushing him to the concrete His glasses fall to the ground as the lead and his chest meet Flying back, he hits the podium and slowly slides to the blacktop No spark left, and no way to ignite like a wet matchbox His head slowly tilts to the side, and on his face a grin Eyes look up and catch his boss', as the thread runs thin The leader grabs the man in black, and falls to his knees 'This man lost his life, because i was his responsibility' Standing up, but in a suit of white Now walking down the road of gold, Towards the only street light Letting go of sin, starting his life long sentence realising his responsibility turned to be his own pennance Sorry i went a little over, if you have to go by rules d/q me, but C'mon now its only 3 lines and won't make a difference. |
As Time Twists Into A Metaphorical State Of Confusion.. Illusions Form Into Heaven and Hell Combined In Fusion.. The Evil and Holiness Of The Drifted Souls Restify Death.. I Congress To Bless The Best of The Best Till My Last Breath.. But To Confess My Sins Would Have Corrupted Reality.. Inflict Brutality Inside of Me With Demons To Battle Me.. I Inquire The Testament of God To Demand and Command.. To Replan The Session of Depression and Reform Lands.. Erosion That Has Taken Effect With The Years That Pass.. Blasts From The Last Flash That Shattered Glass Among Class.. Has Twisted The Future That Has Become Present Among Us.. That Stunned Us..We Weren't Ready For The BlackPox Fungus.. God Came To Me In My Dream and Informed Me Of The Scenes.. Human Tragedy..Seems Human Beings Would Fry Of Ray Beams.. He Questioned My After-Life and Said I Would Be Kept In Hate.. So I Debated The Tribulations of Future I Was Told To Incarserate.. Threw Visions I Was Implanted With C4 Covered By Stiched Incisions.. Till The Year 1973 I Grew Up, Then Blew Up, It Was Gods Decision.. I Was Gifted With Immortality But Life Just Eats The Morality.. Confusion Inside Of Me..A Dream or Was This My True Reality.. Why Was I Gifted With This Curse That Slurs My Words When I Speak.. You Say Its Unique..It Wasn't Something Giving To Me I Wanted To Keep.. It Eats My Sanity Hung Up On A Vanity Hollow Like A Canopy.. And I Can Not See..For My Eyes Have Turned Black As Granite See.. So Grant It Be..I'm The Savior Of Earth With Enimes Angled At Me.. I'll Set Ya Free..With Aerobatic Agility and Superhero Abilities.. High-Vocab Artilary..Gun-Sling Mach 4 With Drastic Verb Versatility.. Watch As You Converse At Sight of Me..I Laugh At Your Pety Presence.. Spit In Ya Face Just To Enlight'N Me..I'm Gifted With Many Presents.. I Am The Sourcer Of Earth..Bow To Me..I Control You Filthy Fesiants.. ~R~ |
Whoooooo
Liquor Of Tears-Nice Drop Overall because mainly you had similies and metaphores and Structure was decent and a lil imaginery Restrictied-I think your Vocab Killed it Mayn..you had everything like Lot but Vocab killed it and Overall Drop v/restricted |
hot
hot verses by both.....
both great use of multies and metas...... like meta said restricted had the beta vocab but im gonna go with L.O.T.....jus because i found it easier to follow n overall just enjoyed the verse more i felt it had a lil more depth n imagery no hate,both verses fire....not a lot in it at all.... vote L.O.T |
Wow...BS out the ass...Funny how the mod can come back.
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LoL Sorry My PC Blew Up...and I Had To Work 3 Weeks Straight To Get The Money For A New PC...Get Off MY Nutz...
Uppin Dis Shit ~R~ |
hott verses
lot this was a nice verse and ur flow was pretty much flowin but i believe u went a lil off topic.. and thats what the problem was your verse was nice but you lacked any thing meaning full..it lacked..emotion me reading this felt like you had no emotion at all.. its hard to explain 7/10 restricted your flow was good and your verse had great emotion and good structurei think you won byu having better strucutre actually slightly better strucutre and emotion.. you guys were about even on flow overall 8/10 my vote Restricted |
R
3 Best Bars Threw Visions I Was Implanted With C4 Covered By Stiched Incisions.. Till The Year 1973 I Grew Up, Then Blew Up, It Was Gods Decision.. 9/10 I Was Gifted With Immortality But Life Just Eats The Morality.. Confusion Inside Of Me..A Dream or Was This My True Reality.. 9.2/10 I'll Set Ya Free..With Aerobatic Agility and Superhero Abilities.. High-Vocab Artilary..Gun-Sling Mach 4 With Drastic Verb Versatility.. 9.5/10 LOT He opens the door and stands up, a crowd of strangers Head on a swivel, keepin his eye out for dangers 9/10 Flying back, he hits the podium and slowly slides to the blacktop No spark left, and no way to ignite like a wet matchbox 8.7/10 Cameras flashing, Microphones pushed to his direction But the man in the glasses pushes them to their own section 9/10 Winner-Restricted He Had Some Tight Shit Vocab was tight...Lot Nice but R took this |
ok Im not gonna go into deep detail like polifik did...but...
LOT: good multis....good vocab...structure was also good...good metaphors also...no real flaws from what I can see..maybe a little more emotion in there...but over all well done... R: pretty good structure...good emotion...flowed well...vocab was also well done...it just seemed there was more that you served up...well done... Overall both drops were nice...but since I have to choose which one was better Im gonna have to go with Restricted....like I said he just had more emotion and a slightly better structure... Vote-R |
apparently my vote doesnt count..since I dont have 70 posts..hmm...well whatever good shit both yall...pz
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Yo i thought this was a nice topical battle both did hot verses but i think Re$ got this. He had a better layout and the structure was better than L.O.T also his flowed just better and seemed more realistic. Both had decent imagery and nice wordplay but Re$ rhyme scheme was better and i was liking it more to be honest but 1 thing i would suggest is, is to lose the blue and for L.O.T to not multi colour coz it can be a bit hard to read at times but overall good spit peeps.
V/Re$tricted |
I use multicolor to fit teh mood of what is going on. But since its harder to read, i wont do it. I don't see how mine isn't as realistic, considering it is what has almost happened to body guards of the president int he past, i just made him die...not get paralyzed.
Uppin. |
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