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This old town.
I left this town..... to start a new life. To make it big........
Each footsteps an eternity as I inch closer towards my hometown, This dead weight I'm dragging grows as I tromp over known ground, An overgrown dirt trail I travel brings flashbacks of my young days, When we shrouded ourself with pine trees to contain the sun rays, But not tonight... The moon is covered and the thunder is deep, No crickets singing. Only pools of rubble cracking under my feet, Everythings so unfamiliar. I catch quick glimpses of town ruins, But this deep fog is a mystery as my silhouette plows through it, I walk across these burnt bridges. The water under at a stand still, My childhood memories distorting and transforming into a landfill, Entering the town limits the moon illuminates and acts as street lamps, Reflecting off of the thousands of raindrops that left the trees damp, Turning onto a graveled road littered with these forgotten memories, Wondering for a fraction of a second if my footprints remember me, Regaining my focus ahead. I continue and the roads getting colder, Suddenly I feel a devilish stare boiling holes into my shoulders, I shake off the glare cause this village is littered with lost souls, Who's purpose serves to clarify all that glitters is not gold, But I tread my path lightly, won't react to these actions, I left this place to define myself and I didn't look back once, Approaching an old rugged cabin. Covered in some dead vines, Tearing away the weeds and leaves that blanketed the address sign, Glancing once at the home. Turning my back and eyes with quick stride, Walking away expressionless on the outside. But die on the inside, Stop and wet my face in a puddle, wondering what I'm becoming. Wait for water to settle to see my reflection. It does... I see nothing. |
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yo nice peice man. you're actually starting to become one of my favorite artists to read in the OM section. Your imagery once again is what sets you apart from many of the others on this site. ive never seen a person bring a vision to life the way you do in a long time. not only does it bring the story to life visually, you can almost hear the narration as the images run across your mind
Turning onto a graveled road littered with these forgotten memories, Wondering for a fraction of a second if my footprints remember me probably the best line ive read in the last couple weeks. good drop man and keep em comin 8.5/10 |
this is honestly the best piece anyone has dropped in a while.
The imagery was the best i've seev in a long ass time...the flow was damn near perfect...and not just the flow as everyone knows it..but the flow from line to line..sequence to sequence..this shit was like a movie..and that is due to your great imagery...and really good syllable count. not to mention..the over-all concept of this shit is fire...very original...very personal as well...i think that's what I loved about this...i know i don't know you too well..but i feel like I know you better then I did before just from reading this. very, very well written topical. good shit kirk. |
All Im gonna say is, you better be signed up for VE. This is tight brother!
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wow ...
this piece is great. i am in a lazy mood right now, and i had no problem reading your whole verse. first off i love the way you ended each line, each rhyme for some reason just fit perfectly to me. Your imagery was on point..you really brought the senses to life with this piece...your vocabulary was good ..i dont think it plays a factor but it was very noticable. Emotion is something you definitley added..i feel you on that...just a well sounded topical...nothing to really knock you on man...keep this shit up..im loving your shit and cant wait for more. |
OM of the month. This piece was great. Love the ending.
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Everythings so unfamiliar. I catch quick glimpses of town ruins,
But this deep fog is a mystery as my silhouette plows through it Turning onto a graveled road littered with these forgotten memories, Wondering for a fraction of a second if my footprints remember me I left this place to define myself and I didn't look back once, Approaching an old rugged cabin. Covered in some dead vines, Tearing away the weeds and leaves that blanketed the address sign, Glancing once at the home. Turning my back and eyes with quick stride, Walking away expressionless on the outside. But die on the inside beeute. |
Did you enter the topical tourney? Cuz this shit is fucking amazing. I don't like topical shit much and I enjoyed this a lot. Nice flow and theme, shit was just smooth. Keep it up man.
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yo man thats a deep peice
good to peep sum thoughtful stuff u paint a picture bro i feels it ~one hunnit~ |
I'm gonna come over your house n pimp slap you if you dont' finish your verse for our collab son. Anyways..
Mr. Imagery is at it again..you actually painted a picture in my head as I read through it which takes some talent. That alone impressed me, it told a decent story..kept me reading. I like the rhyme scheme you use, its perfect for your style.. it caps off each line nicely an you fill them with good vocab an well thought out words to keep the imagery on point. Good shit man, rtf. |
Upping and stuff.
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This was seriously dope on the real
Topic was original and you stuck to it greatly Loved the metaphors used in this and the ending was, pretty much, poetic Flow was nice and diggin the vocab Also, your imagery is vivid, well done on that Stand out lines; But this deep fog is a mystery as my silhouette plows through it Wondering for a fraction of a second if my footprints remember me Stop and wet my face in a puddle, wondering what I'm becoming. Wait for water to settle to see my reflection. It does... I see nothing. |
Upping and stuff.
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dope stuff right here...
i enjoyed the read. |
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