From His Point of View
There’s only so many sorries a mind can take
before a person falls down, stumbles and breaks. It isn’t worth all the pain I’ve had, all the things I’ve went through just to get a piece that’s mad. Can’t understand the other side, just wanting to get on a good tide. Wonder at night is this really worth it, then in the day I confirm it. Still the things I put up with are insane, slanders and her wanting me to change. Little by little, I succumb to the wishes, little by little I stop throwing switches. Stuck in love, but can’t find a way out, this is my story of how one man can’t shout. Slowly falling and increasing in speed, never going to tell you the things I need. Physically enjoyable but mentally unstable, I tell myself I’m willing and capable, but some days like today its just too much for me to handle. |
wow, really emotional......felt this....ur vocab needs ta up...and ur structure.....an easy way out to make ur structure look iight is just center it.....lol and this had good concept 7.5/10...not bad......holla at my o/ms in tha sig
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thanks man, uppin this
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http://community.rapverse.com/showt...d=1#post2402210 my link, and UpPiN
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this was good, but purely fiction, lol, emotion was good, flow was very good, structure is getting better, keep it up
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