My Word...
 

Bare with me on this one. It was part of an improvisation thing with other people. It's kind of out of context in a way. But that's part of the point.



"My word that nigger can fly"
He's won Gold black to white
"Did you hear his mother cry?"

"In my bed dark at night"
Her tears oil my body
"She's quite a desperate sight"
Darkness has it's place with me

"She screams for joy right now"
Ugly bastard bucking shit bints
"What tired deed....."

"Echoing time with my fury"
Rubber toys bring most pain
"A horse to rent n ride.."
Coins of fear work too..
"She's my bitch nothing more"..
So size and forms matter none

“Kill him!” Say the hooded clans
Hypocrites to hollow thoughts
“Can’t be lovin’ no colour”
Pale face coloured rich red
“We’ll beat him black”
Do they forget the blue?
“Now where my shotgun be?”
Shells that bruise indeed

“I don’t love no caramel”
Fear runs melon yellow
“But lightly on my vanilla”
Once savage now so mellow
“Kill THAT monkey boy instead”
Arms shaking covered in sweat
“He does not know his place”

“Foolish boy they are animals”
Filling holes with fleeting logic
“So they run good”

“Put down the frothing animal”
Die sweet ass African candy
“Make his face into nothing”
To ram and enter no more

“Momma what happened”
They talked too loud is what..
“Bodies lying everywhere”

“Their God took them away”...
White evolution need no passengers
“We masters need to be wary”..
Tables turn in savage circles

Hm... it seemed in quite into it's context to me.

I aint say I understood what was happening at first. But around the rubber toys line, I think I figured it all out. Then shit got switched up and it was crazy.

What I found amazing was that sense of rush that was portrayed in this. Like everything was happening in flashes with only bits and peices of things going on at a time and just one right after another so quickly.

I dunno, I thought that took some skill.

~Shalom~

He pretty much summed it up.. The imagery in this is what really caught my attention, as i read i saw a picture in my head, you did a great job with that.. very good read

very very deep......reminded me of a book by richard wright its called native song....you should check it out.....now on to the poem...

Echoing time with my fury"
Rubber toys bring most pain
"A horse to rent n ride.."
Coins of fear work too..
"She's my bitch nothing more"..
So size and forms matter none

i like how descriptive this is......but not only that it also has a lot of historically accuracy......black women have been degraded and thought very low of for a long time.....


“I don’t love no caramel”
Fear runs melon yellow
“But lightly on my vanilla”
Once savage now so mellow
“Kill THAT monkey boy instead”
Arms shaking covered in sweat
“He does not know his place”

my favorite part not only is it deliciously descriptive but it captures the pure animal ignorance and fear that accompanies racial hate...you are killing them with this piece......i need to come back and look at this again and again......

Though references white over black. It's meant to be about humanity. That on the whole, the race is humanity, human nature. Just look at India. Or the 'Orients'. Or west Africa etc.

Hence the end (which is spoken by the black woman to her son).

Comments appreciated. Especially those that are brutal.

..resp....

wow, at first i didnt bother to read all of it couse it looked like garbage. then i did read all of it. man, that thing that makes so much creativity inspires me. great poem, so "awe". i love it, it mixes up feelings, almost to the point of confusing me. it was great in its own way. the vocab was on. the rhymes were good. strange format i must say but still got me with the end of the poem. this is the kind of stuff that books are made of....

this piece takes thinking to understand...the imagery was nice as hell...ish was deep...nice stuff...deserves more than 6 replies...everybody should read this piece...it might increase your mind capcity

It was a 'passing' piece...so not that good.


Comments appreciated.

ironic, u spelt "mind capacity" wrong.

^That kind of pedantry is not needed. Especially in someone elses thread.

I mean i'm all for irony. But come on...hardly the kind to point out in here.