Genrally Aimed....critz Plz!!!
 

i read your 'RELIGIOUS~RIGHTS'~i spit 'KNOWLEDGE' and im 'AIMIN'~AT~YOU'//
ill turn you in~to~a 'VEDA'~make~you~confused like a 'HINDU'~spittin'~'HEBREW'//
then 'READ~THRU'~see how much i can understand~of~your~'PHILOSOPHY'//
make~and~'DISIPLIN'~you~through~'MY~TEACHING~OF~HI P-HOPGRAPHY'//
your~lost~in~my~'THESIS'...like~'GEORGE.W.BUSH~TRY ING~TO~READ~A~ENVOROMENTAL~TREATY'//
your 'BELIEF~IN~RHYME~WILL~NEVER~DEFEAT~ME' so~try~and~'FUEL'~your~verse~by~eating~some~'PEATY '//
im 'HEATED'~like~'BIGGIE~AND~PAC~ROCKIN'~IN~A~GUNSMIT HS'//
if~your~'MOUTHS~YOUR~GUN~YOU~SPITTIN'~BLANKS'...yo u better get it 'REPAIRED~QUICK'//
my~'MAGS~HOLDIN'~VERBS~TO~SMASH~ALL~YOU~HERBS'//
an~kids~from~the~suburbs~who~never~had~there~mouth s~to~the~curb//
i leave you 'ST~ST~ST~STUTTERING' in your battle attire~cos'~when~i~blow~i~dont~misfire//
you'll be like "man~this~battle~is~fire" leave you burnt like~'KAYNE~WEST~WITH~A~HOT~WIRE'//
this aint aimed at any 'KATS' specifically~just~all~of~you~in~general//
this~might~make~you~'BLEED'~but~y'all~dont~need~to ~get~all~'MENSTRUAL'//

crits plz

bumpin' up.........................................crits plz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lmao

That was annoying i aint gonna read..

But follow the rules! ..else this will be closed = )

erm............i read the rules was it the one line reply?????
im gonna talk shit for a bit so it aint one line....have a merry christmas and a happy new year!!!

i get cha....the three posts....i read the rules but it aint sayin' every time you start a thread.....never mind...

i cant seem to post the links but...

2 of EnLitend's posts
WORD~PERFECT

This was ok....your structure could use some work, your lines are stretched out, try to shorten them down a bit so its structured good and so it helps the flow out....vocab in this was ok, could be up'd though....but overall this was ok...keep at it.

thanks Masta C....i feel ya.....its ok when i rap it though...cos i write to a beat....but i nah wat ya mean....on paper when you read it it does lack structure and consistency....thanks for tha feedback bro.....peace.