Freestyle
 

CHORUS
i kno uve had problems in da relationships of da past
pervs alwayz grabbin u wanna piece a dat ass
naww baby u kno me i aint in dat type a class
i get a's 4 bein a gentalmen straight up pass

i lookin back on tha things we used tuh have..
not much but they defanally aint so bad..
we messed up before mayb it was me, jussa tad..
but the shit ive thru after iz making me mad..
let da past b past cuz we r what we iz now..
ill prove u my love like make u shake like wow..
dont need words these lyrics not even a sound..
got me screaming ya name all cross deez towns..
i wish we had what we wanted soo long ago..
fuck deez niggaz tryna call u a hoe..
i want u to love me lik i love u .. even mo..
scream shit like mya cuz r love iz like wo..
and i aint playin dats fo sho..
am i given a lil 2 much..
4 not even a single touch..
and i no u aint a slut..
we aint even need tuh cut..

CHORUS
i kno uve had problems in da relationships of da past
pervs alwayz grabbin u wanna piece a dat ass
naww baby u kno me i aint in dat type a class
i get a's 4 bein a gentalmen straight up pass
i kno uve had problems in da relationships of da past
pervs alwayz grabbin u wanna piece a dat ass
naww baby u kno me i aint in dat type a class
i get a's 4 bein a gentalmen straight up pass

dont need titties ass or even pussy..
that shitz 4 ppl that cant handle love "real wussies"
and for bitches i got short temper.. dont push me..
shed yah blood every where real guushie..
now lets get back 2 da topic
my love shootin off lika bottle rocket..
noo known force can stop it
and the only 1.. u that can top it..
i try 2 do tha right shit
got a real NIGHT STICK
and im tha mc that liks 2 ryme quick
and love beyond tyme.. tick..tick..
love stronger then jackie chan kick .. kick
and i love u more than nething
and ill give up everything
tha good stuff and tha bling bling
and give up all my money ching ching..

CHORUS
i kno uve had problems in da relationships of da past
pervs alwayz grabbin u wanna piece a dat ass
naww baby u kno me i aint in dat type a class
i get a's 4 bein a gentalmen straight up pass

itz not that good
i kno that
but ehh i dont care thats why i want yall to help
you kno

its alright... you need to fix your structure you had some good lines.. fix the flow a bit... and create more imagery..
pz

yeah i think this was ok.....needs worked in places...but once ya fix the scheme n add a bit more creativity...should be decent....jus keep working on it...pZ...

You need to leave 3 links or 3 names of people you left feedback to or this will get closed, Thanks.

But this was ok.....your structure could be better though, try keeping your lines around the same length so its structured good and so it helps out the flow in your piece...you had some alright vocab...had some ok multies, try to make those a bit better though...but this was ok...keep at it.

tyhanx yall

just a question ..

since when did 'freestyles'
have chorus's ? ......

nice subject....need some word play...some vocab...and other shit lol......6/10 keep work'n kid

good peice.. your structure is a little bit off...
you had some decent lines.. but when you read it few times its a good peaice

ohh sorrry i give this a 6/10

Posted back without links...this is Closed...follow rules next time.