Inpureities
 

As i Walk Freely over dirty terraine,Im gettin stabbed by Used old Needles//
Syringes peel back the skin of my feet,The babies Scream like Culled baby seals//
A system designed to take back what we earn,Is it rbbery,No-its TAX//
Therapists Ask always how we feel, "Im OK!",the governments on ya back//
Wage more for war that we all dissagree,silent night bombs take the homes of peasents//
No home to sleep in they serge for food, their father killed for stealin pheasent//
Laws dont concure to be left un-aided,wre branded thieves wen though shalt not steal//
But how we ment to take on a meal. Come on Tony Blaire, act up. Be real//
These dangerd species we call fine people, are all cut down, shared out to minoritys//
Periodicly were makin moves, to stoppin our nation discriminating stereotypically//
re-animated to be taken for gruanted,these antics crowned are the ones to be given//
if were a problem for Britain my leader,why is it at birth u let us poor ones be living//
my thoughts are strong now for instance im ressurecting,the late,the fallen TuPac//
So i can rebel against comercial Bitches,and i can pop him, and send his ass back//
im not the one who cares all about me, i mean im never the kind for security//
I like to think of my self as an Outkast, the kind who point out his planets Impurities.......

*All diffirent things that we call Impure...
All diffirent things that we can call Clean...
Are devided up into two diffirent Tiers...
One is real life and the other a Dream..*

You need to leave 3 links or 3 names of people you left feedback to or this will get closed, Thanks.

Ur Welcome

Tecnician
Too Easy
Dialekts

Uppin....

Uppin Part 2

That had a very decent flow, and some good meta's and shit. The topic is awesome, and the scheme is good. work on some more complicated rhymes thats all i can say as crit, if it is crit.

lol...Thanx...And its E Z breh...!!

Good Good Flow, And Meta And Rhyme Scheme Were Pretty Sick...Vocabulary Was Good Too...

8.33/10

return the favor....Peep "DRINK LIQUOR FROM A CHALICE"

Aight thanx bro

vocab and ideas in here were strong although some multis wouldve helped the flow of this, the bar length was a little too long as well, although i like the revolutionary raps which people seem to have forgotten about.

a notch above what i usually read i here, good work.


p.s: s.r. if youre gonna rate a rhyme out of ten, why the hell do you keep using decimels? the whole POINT of rating someone out of ten is to use a whole number!

LOL @ decimals....

Im glad some1 relises the bar length..Its not something im trying so hard to do, but i thought about it, and decided to jus chek it out.....The multies and internal rhymin is somethin im sick of doing at the mo....So i decided to have change....Make it just a message verse or whateva... thanx all the same

your alright man,youve got good vocab but your topics are abit too deep for people to relate to and understand, dont get me wrong though it makes sense

Thanx for ur Oppinion Mate..!!

yea this was soild... keep it comin