Emoitional verse or two
 

juss cant stop me from likein ya
i kno i wasnt supposed tuh like ya
ima a thug and im not supposed tuh wife ya
i dont know why we started this way
i dont know why we couldnt finish these thangs
we were not supposed tuh b together
mayb thats why we couldn't stay together?
how could a thug like me get wit a girl like u
strange things happen wen ya dealin wit love (tru)
i mean how could i forget, trust me
we juss cant force this, juss love me
and i juss adore ya miss, u must see
i had a girl, and u had him too, i dumped my girl juss for u
u stayed wit him cuz he loves u,
and i kno that its hard but u must
dump him get a man that you trust

cant waist my time with this cheatin ya heard me?
ill juss be rappin' so please be seated ya heard me?
im down in the dumps for good ya heard me?
ill juss bee on this slump for good ya heard me?
and ill still be lovin' her ya heard me? (Be lovin her)
and ill still be thuggin' her ya heard me?(be thuggin her)

dedicated to a girl who ment the world to me
if she came back i would hope she'd be there for me
and if she's not, i might drop, my shit might flop
im hear now with her and im in a tight spot
lights off, tippy toes, sneek in, in the bedroom creepin,
what, huh??, hell nah, what? i aint.. im juss sleepin!?*
i need tuh stop the game before it gets switched ya heard?
im gunna get my heart broken, needs some stitch ya heard?
tired of lookin when the perfect one is right unda ya nose
but i still keep lookin but i find nothing, nothin but hoes
i need to realized before a real man crys and before he see's why
then he'll be fine and he'll stop lies and he'll de-cide (on this girl)
like i said before..
dedicated to a girl who ment the world to me
if she came back i would hope she'd be there for me
wont stop cant stop like the yung gunnaz, still cheatin'
mayb ill realize when i see her on a date with another man eatin'
will be when she ask me over then introduces her boy we meetin'


myposts on open mic are...
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...848#post1067848
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...862#post1067862

flow is off but i juss want to get thru to yall
wit da last verse ya know... nothin fancee
but straight from the heart yah know?

ayyy somone replie..

this was alright Man Ya Did alright.....ya Structure was a bit off but it was still pretty Good...ya Flow was Betta than I thought ya Stayed Pretty Much on Topic.....so yea not bad Ya Vocab wasnt great but ya Wordplay was alright though.....So this was a Decent Piece man......PeacE........

thanx alot
hopin to get more replies

k... ne day now folks

Yeah this wasnt that bad here.....your structure could use some work though, try keeping your lines around the same length so it helps the flow....try adding some multies to this to make it better....but overall this was alright man....keep at it.

uppin...!