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Suicide Note.
Suicide Note.
I'm feeling like a stranger, Obstacles growed to big for me to climb on & its like the ground isnt mine to walk upon Ne more,... so soon i must leave like the moon as the earth turned its turn& im no longer immune but fragile & weak all those nights i couldnt sleep got affected by this leap of nightmares yes i weep But i guess, this will all ends as i end with this all & i just couldnt imagine,i came so far i cant even fall And so i just locked my actions in the routes of routine & compared to a box its just squared, tight & obscene So i'm sorry if it hurts u , but this hurts me even more but its just this game with my self&need to settle the score If u love me, remind me as this nice smiling young face not this useless wreck thats lately has taking my place But for now this is good bye, hope we will meet up again & if u are a friend when the time is right we will meet up then But noone wil stop me, as i poor out my last breath 'go ahead' Cause the seed wants to live but.... the flower is just dead & For all the times we shared, i will thank u my friends but if i want a new beginning i must start with the end I will miss u all.. Sincerely ..yours..Michael. |
basic rhymes but it conveys a strong message. good piece.
since you are a nirvana fan and all, you should check out Kurt's suicide note...though it isnt a rap....it is still quite interesting. also...read kurt kobain's Journals. its fucking really interesting/tight/crazy/cool. see you in amsterdam. |
Basic lol, ..
I got the journals..up. |
nice piece a suicide note U could have used biger words
but overall a good piece not your best but I can tell you didnt go all out like how u normally do .....but overall good- |
Thnx but people..flow, inners..content.. cmon :p
Vocab fitted this piece in my opinion, O.o Upper the topper |
Shit... I'll come back to reply properly tomorrow...
My eyes hurt from trying to read the small font drunk.... |
LOooooooooool
UP |
deep piece, i like readin shits like this, something that will make you feel something...
tho vocab wasn't the strong point, as you said, your scheme, inners, content made up for it with class.. if there is anything i would have to pick on it would be the length of the piece, i don't know about you, but i think if i was going to commit suicide, and i left a note, it would probably convey more of a reason for the act also... 8/10, good drop if you could check my piece, "Hell", and give some constructive(emphasis on constructive) criticism, it would be most appreciated... Split |
blah at people thinking you need a dictionary for an open mic
fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! anyway this was a nice thought out piece...made me think and that is good...it was emotional and the message between the lines is like whoa.......................... anyway drop some good feed on "Untangible Evil" |
Werd, message counts, with a little wp and come vocab at places i tought, it would fitted, .. = )
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