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Limitation
I can write a billion words, but none would be adequate to describe her.
I should sing a million songs, but not a one would take note of the longing. I could raise a thousand tophats but the morning wouldn't express the truth. I will dance a hundred steps but not one of them will be in the right direction. I can't drink a ounce more, she loves me to the core. Tells me lies as it slides down my throat I emote pride. I won't ever love again, she keeps me in her head. All that keeps me sane when the river starts to bend. |
thats creepy 666 posts lol
anywho the piece short and simple. structure and vocab were simple, but it was nice that way. your imangenary was great thou, a topic of lost love done again, but you kept it interesting and real. it seemed natural and showed its emotion. it was a nice read. ~Tera~ DONT HATE |
lol, Im at 666 posts and your at 420..............dope
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upp'n for feedback
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This was short...but your lines were good.
I liked the emotion in each..and the words you chose to show feeling Basic in some parts but dvanced in others...which made it easy to understand Good drop. I enjoyed it. |
..............gracias
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short.... but i liked the emotion on each line, vocab was pretty simple but the words still helped with the emotion, Structure was good....keep droppin
peace |
I liked The Vocab No Doubt.Structure Was Great You Got Everything On Lock.Emotional Thats Pretty Hard To Poemize About. keep On Poemizing GL.
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short... but sweet, nise structure and it was reel, keep it up
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A Thousnad Hearts Beat 2 Tha Youngbloodz New Debut Nah Lil Suckas It Aint 2002.this Is 2003 And Im Feelin Simply Angry That Shawty B Gave In Her Poem So Soon Hey Ma Give It A Second Go And Dont Think So U Can Be Focused Aighht Yeah I Know Im Tight.
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^wtf?
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^ THATS WHAT IM TRYING TO FIND OUT
but to the point... this piece was short and simple, like said above, it's a topic i've read and written numerous times but i like your style, you kept me interested, keep writing, nice drop |
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